Random Thought for Thursday 10/31/13

So remember a few Saturdays ago when I ranted on my soapbox about the "surprise" doubling in price on the USA Today I purchase daily?  [If you don't, you can see it at the link below.  Or not.  Whatevs.]

Today, while adding that paper on to the pharmacy purchase I was making, the older gentleman (well, older than I am, but clearly not yet retired as he was checking me out [well, ringing up my purchase, not emulating a creepy Catholic priest for Halloween or anything {and, by the way, Happy Halloween to you and yours}]) expressed shock and shared ...

"$2.00!?  I remember when I used to sell this for 7 cents when I was a kid."

Ahhh ...perspective.  Well played, pharmacy man ... well played!

MY ORIGINAL RANT AT THE BEGINNING OF THE MONTH:
http://capcognition.blogspot.com/2013/10/random-soapbox-for-saturday-10513.html

JUSTIFICATION FOR THE NEW PRICING:
http://www.bizjournals.com/washington/news/2013/09/11/usa-today-doubles-newsstand-price-to-2.html

JUSTIFICATION FOR YOU NOT MAKING FUN OF ME ANYMORE FOR READING IT:
http://ajr.org/article.asp?id=878

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 10/30/13

Facebook Ephemera.

Used in a sentence:  "I sometimes struggle with the nomenclature used on the old Facebook, but I think I've finally settled on how I'll refer to things from now on ... I'll call it all the Facebook Ephemera."

Good old Zuckerberg may have been pushing things a bit when he decided that all "connections" in his program would be "friends", because, let's just get truthful and admit that not everyone connected to me deserves that classification.  In addition to "friends", I have family and distant family and family from whom I've distanced myself and colleagues and former co-workers and erstwhile employees and acquaintances and classmates (from almost thirty years of various educational programs, since I fought tooth and nail from having to leave that world) and shells-of-those-whom-I-once-knew-well and people I'm monitoring until I have to report them to the authorities for an overzealous stridency evidenced in some status updates that cross a line (or two ... or five) and maybe even one or two enemies whom I somehow still haven't unfriended and who have not somehow unfriended me.

In a virtual world where creative output is disposable, and comments appear and disappear at the whim of the people, and virtual profiles exist and then get deleted after folks read the current trendy version of the privacy scares that go around, I've just decided to embrace the fact that, as we all become more isolationally insular in an internet-fueled existence, everything and everyone out there is at risk of becoming e-detritus that simply has no permanency and that just ... fades away ... i.e.  Facebook Ephemera.

[And, to end on a slightly more upbeat note, I may consider you and that which you post to be Facebook Ephemera, but hey, you're *my* Facebook Ephemera!]

HOW TO MANAGE YOUR FEED:
http://www.pcworld.com/article/258608/seven_tips_for_spicing_up_your_facebook_news_feed.html

THE GOVERNMENT'S IN THE EPHEMERA BUSINESS:
http://memory.loc.gov/ammem/rbpehtml/

NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH EPHEMERA (THE ROCK BAND) ON FACEBOOK:
https://www.facebook.com/EphemeraMusic

Random Tune for Tuesday 10/29/13

I'll tell you this ... I don't mind driving 12 hours at a time when I have CDs to which I can listen (and with which I could sing along), and my most recent trip just this past weekend was certainly no exception.

Since I was going to see Pearl Jam, I definitely had a mini-concert of theirs, and I did the same thing with Toad the Wet Sprocket (whom I'm seeing in just over two weeks) ... but the first mini-concert of the trip was to play the 3 disc collection of Reba's called "50 Greatest Hits".

Of course, clearly the image accompanying today's post is not of Eddie and the boys NOR of Glen and the boys NOR of Reba ... but it is a surprise cover of Reba's classic "Does He Love You?" (note that it's a cover of the song and not necessarily a cover of the video, so I cannot affirm that Liza and Donna also blew up the philanderer's boat after singing the tune to each other).  Ah ... the things you find in an internet-based world, where the wiki and the youtube and obsessed fans collide.

A VERSION I NEVER KNEW EXISTED:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tlOCvLTJXXQ

Random Memorial for Monday 10/28/13

Gone but not forgotten:  those important to me who left this world in the month of October in years past.

While driving home from my quick trip to Baltimore, I did manage to coordinate a detour through Uniontown, where I could pay my respects to my "surrogate" grandmother JoAnn.  JoAnn, who was preceded in death by her daughter, used to always visit the grave every fall to put down a grave blanket -- not so much because of the "physics" of it all to actually keep the final resting place warmer in the winter, but as a gesture to show that even when loved ones pass, if those who are left behind pause to remember them on occasion, they more vividly live on in the hearts and memories of those who miss them.

Just like I have a tradition for DJ (who also passed in October, now 12 years ago) where I "share" a Swisher Sweet cigar, leaving half behind for him at his gravesite each time to memorialize the late night conversations we used to have on the balcony of our Greentree apartment fraternity house at the end of many days in the mid-90's, so do I now have a tradition for when I visit the final resting place of JoAnn -- I leave behind one rose picked up from the local Giant Eagle (the grocery store where she used to stock up on Mystics and Chicken Noodle Soup for my visits with her through the years -- just a small part of all that she did for me for almost two decades).

Joann (and DJ too) -- not just when the calendar rolls around to the cold dismal month of late October each year, but throughout it as well -- you (both) are truly missed.

Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 10/27/13

What Baltimore is talking about this week:

Pearl Jam!

[Okay, you might be sick of me talking about them, so I'll promise I'll stop ... well, *after* this post ...]

I was privileged (thanks again for the surprise invite from Jon M, my college roommate 20 years ago at LVC in Funk 213 [and, in a moment of kismet related to this "reunion", we realized that our seats were in the 213 section of the arena] to have attended the sold out show in that city (the first time they visited in their 23 year history) on Sunday night, and it did not disappoint (which was expected, of course).  It was nearly three hours for nearly three dozen songs (many from the latest release 'Lightning Bolt', to which I've been counting down for the last ten weeks in my P Jam Jam series [click the link from the labels on the right]), all performed under a set design that, at first glance, seemed to be a good number of bug-zappers, but that really worked in a transforming way once they did their magic and went up and down and changed colors and served as an item from which Eddie could swing out over the crowd.

Of course, that crowd was encouraged to rock along with the band for multiple songs, and most everyone did (except the couples here and there where clearly one party was dragged along by the other and was dealing with the experience on behalf of their partner [I don't know why their love wasn't strong enough that the one should just stay at home and let a real fan buy the seat?]).  One of many memorable moments came when Eddie pulled a fan out of the back of the arena whom he had noticed at the very beginning of the show (when, from the stage, he warned "the guy in the yellow shirt in the back" to "pace himself") and got him to the stage for the finale to play tambourine beside man.

The moment of catharsis that only Pearl Jam can provide came just before that finale, when all the lights came on in the arena, and everyone sang "Alive", one to another.  Because although many of us couldn't personally relate to the specifics in the lyrics of that song, we all could triumphantly admit, that despite whatever trauma we'd been through individually, as a collective body, at exactly that very moment, with the lights up so that we could look into each others' eyes if we so chose, we all, strangers and friends alike, were individuals who were most definitely "still alive (yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah)".  Like the Native American in the classic pollution commercial, it may be that a single tear rolled down my cheek at that moment, although, if asked, I'd have said that it must have just been irritation from the sweet sweet smelling smoke that wafted up through the crowd every so often.

As Eddie said from the stage that night referencing the loss of Lou Reed earlier that day, "music heals".  Amen, brother Eddie, amen.

LOCAL REVIEW OF THE BALTIMORE CONCERT I ATTENDED:
http://blogs.citypaper.com/noise/index.php/2013/10/live-review-pearl-jam-at-the-baltimore-arena/

PROFESSIONAL PICS FROM THE BALTIMORE CONCERT:
http://photos.citypaper.com/index.php/pearl-jam-at-the-baltimore-arena-in-photos/#1

NOT OLD ENOUGH TO KNOW THE AD OF WHICH I SPEAK?:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j7OHG7tHrNM

Random Posting for Penn State 10/26/13

Here are 9 Nittany Nuggets for tonight's game!

1.) So let me explain ... I'm watching the game in Cleveland OH at a bar as a Penn State fan, so I decided to come up with a drinking game to accompany my viewing.
2.) Although, to repeat myself, I'm watching the game in Cleveland OH at a bar as a Penn State fan, so if you don't see me posting later tonight or tomorrow, you can assume that something nefarious occurred and you should alert the authorities.
3.) DRINKING GAME RULE: Any time Jen Lewis Roose posts something about how great it is to actually *BE* at the game, chug your beer. [Note, you have to be friends with her on FB in order to execute on this.
4.) DRINKING GAME RULE: Any time the announcemen mention either team's issues with post-season penalties, steal a swig from your neighbor's beer when he's not looking.
5.) DRINKING GAME RULE: Buy me a drink every time FICKEN scores, 'cause he's my favorite player (I'm man enough to admit that, so what?).
6.) DRINKING GAME RULE: Do four shots in succession every time ZWINAK is responsible for converting on fourth down.
7.) DRINKING GAME RULE: Find your beer funnel from college and make it work every time the announcer says "the big arm of HACKENBERG".
8.) DRINKING GAME RULE: Buy a round for the bar when the announcermen correctly say THE Ohio State.
9.) DRINKING GAME RULE: If we win, make everyone in your house take a shot (family, kids [one won't hurt them -- it will aid with the digestion of their dinner], plants, animals), as that will be an UP-SET SON!

In closing, thanks Cleveland for hosting me watching the game tonight ... and the countdown to our next post-season game that may or may not be as late as 2016 stands at no more than 41 more games (but may be a bit less)!

Random Soapbox for Saturday 10/26/13

I don't mean to go off on a (mandated once a month) rave here, but ...

... patience is a virtue and perseverance will be rewarded.

Or, said less cryptically ... remember how last week I was ranting about old age creeping up on me in that I had no idea why I had e-jotted the phrase "I live in CT" in my cell phone app as a possible topic for an upcoming post?  Well -- turns out that the mystery was solved by just keeping it at the forefront of my mind ... and by watching the season finale of "How the States Got Their Shapes" on H2-on-demand.

And it turns out by living in Chicago, I *do* live in Connecticut -- that is I *do* live in erstwhile Connecticut, had it been able to keep its early-US-history western claims (see image).  With that in mind, perhaps I should act a little WASP-ier?

By the way, according to the same series, Pennsylvania and Connecticut once warred (and I grew up in PA, and was educated in PA, and lived for eighteen months in the western PA territory over which they fought, and visited the William Penn-aquin surrounded by multiple stuffed ruffed grouses at the State Museum multiple times, and I never knew that we were battle enemies), and so it looks like I've escaped being a Connecticut-ian twice in my life already.  Who knew?  My mind is blown a little bit with this news.

CHECKING IN ON CT STEREOTYPES SINCE I ALMOST WAS FROM CT (TWICE!):
http://ctboom.com/5-connecticut-stereotypes-that-are-completely-and-utterly-true/

NO ONE EVER TOLD ME ABOUT THIS BRUSH WITH CT WHEN I WAS GROWING UP:
http://www.oocities.org/athens/acropolis/2691/pyw.html

STUFFED RUFFED GROUSES (MAKES ME HOMESICK FOR PA A LITTLE):
http://www.statesymbolsusa.org/Pennsylvania/Bird_Ruffed_Grouse.html

Random Flashback for Friday 10/25/13

Ok ... here's just one more photo taken backstage at LVC's production of "The Night of January 16th" ... one that wasn't in the mini-album I created a week ago.  (And that also explains my old age makeup and fake gray hair at my temples ...)

This is me and Casey Jo, my niece.  Casey is my sister Sharon's child, and ... gasp ... inexplicably, neither one of them appears to be on the old Facebook.

So, for now, this 20 year old picture of her will go untagged, but that doesn't mean that I can't pause and think back to 1993 and marvel about how small all of the nieces or nephews were way back then.

[Of course, my family tree is quite entangled, and I consider many folks to be family that have no actual blood connection to me (which makes me one lucky fella), and what with me being an uncle before I was even born (further illustrating my point, no?), *this* generation of nieces and nephews I'm referencing that was so small back then was actually preceded by an earlier generation of nieces and nephews that are now grandparents in their own right (making me a great-great-uncle already by the age of 40!) and they are being followed by another round of people I consider nieces and nephews who are still in or just barely out of school.]

I think I need to go draw a diagram before my head explodes.  And, let me say again, I'm just blessed to have so many people in my life irrespective of how they got there ...

Random Thought for Thursday 10/24/13

Look, I'm an animal guy more than anything.  I know more 'hood pet names than I do 'hood *people* names.  I've said before that people who walk out in front of a car I'm driving are fair game, and they're only spared if they are walking a dog, as the dog shouldn't pay for that owner's stupidity.

But, courtesy of last month's visit to the Chicago Botanic Gardens (a brief one at that, thanks to a fall thunder boomer), there's now this creature growing near the windowsill.  And it's really growing.  Like every day, I watch it get taller and taller.

I'm telling you -- it's alive, people!  It sits behind me across the room while I work at my desk (I work from home, in case you didn't know) and it clearly grows when I'm not looking at it.  I have to admit, it kind of creeps me out a little.

I want to give it a name.  Maybe if I talk to it, it won't sneak up behind me and strangle me while I'm at my laptop.  I'm thinking Seymour, right?  [Although may I should reconsider that, in case I find it ... well ... suddenly standing beside me ...]

I'M EXPECTING *THIS* BY THE HOLIDAYS:
http://mrbrownthumb.blogspot.com/2011/01/amaryllis-charisma-hippeastrum.html

THANKS CHICAGO BOTANIC GARDEN!:
http://www.chicagobotanic.org/

SUDDENLY STANDING BESIDE ME ...:
http://www.avclub.com/articles/suddenly-seymour-is-a-heartmelting-ballad-made-pos,95995/

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 10/23/13

Octothorping in Triplicate.

Used in a sentence:  "Nothing makes me happier than learning a new word, and little makes me happier than uniquely hashtagging on the Facebook, usually in triplicate to satisfy the mild case of OCD I'm cultivating to make my mid-life experience more interesting ... and so I am now approaching my happiest state possible to understand that I'm actually Octothorping in Triplicate."

Depending on your age bracket, you might have thought that # was a number sign ... or a pound key ... or a hash tag ... and, you know, colloquially, it still is free to be that as you casually converse with your counterparts.

But let it be known, I am determined (in the same way I'm determined to work in "whilst" and "fortnight" into my conversations), to look for opportunities to wiggle in an "octothorpe" in my interactions whenever I can.  First up, a certain system that is in use at my work ... where one must hit the octothorpe sign after entering an access code. Work colleagues of mine, I'll start updating the SOP/IOP/KOG/MACRO/ETC in the morning!

AND IT HAS COMPETING ORIGIN STORIES TOO!:
http://www.worldwidewords.org/weirdwords/ww-oct1.htm

I'VE RANTED ABOUT HASHTAGGING BEFORE:
http://capcognition.blogspot.com/2013/09/random-soapbox-for-saturday-91413.html

ACTUALLY, MORE THAN ONCE:
http://capcognition.blogspot.com/2013/06/random-soapbox-for-saturday-61513.html

Random Tune for Tuesday 10/22/13

What can I say, the picture alone should stand as the post.

But since I have problems with editing myself, and since some of you may not have been cruisin' the 422 loop in Lebanon at the turn of the nineties, when you would have heard this classic tune blaring from the vehicles of the youths engaging in that particular pastime, yes ... tonight's random tune is from the debut album of the performer who brought us 'Baby Got Back' -- the one and only Sir Mix-a-lot.

And I might be mistaken, but I think it was the song that was on when Jarrod S's truck blew up on the way to the rumble that almost started in the East Lebanon Pizza Hut parking lot ... until the security guard made us all get back on the circuit.  [I know, I know, it would have been much more fitting for a rumble to be on the West Side of town, but I'm not taking dramatic license here and I'm just reporting it as I remember it.  Get it?  If not, that's OK -- just move right along.]

KENTUCKY FRIED CHICKEN MAKES THE SUCKERS JUST RIGHT:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wwi6WluusfM

Random Memorial for Monday 10/21/13

Gone but not forgotten:  the side of the new-ish sofa.

I think this is the point where I'm supposed to shake my finger at Murder (the cat) and tell her that "this is why we can't have nice things."

Or maybe I should frame this picture and hang it on the front and back doors to warn possible intruders that an "attack cat" who is fully clawed lives here, like those warnings with snarling dogs that are designed to scare away any criminals.

Although I guess I could also rearrange the furniture in the living room and give her access to the other side for the sake of symmetry.

If only she hadn't struck deep enough to get those strings to show ... I was content to let people just think it was dirty or uniquely designed instead of fully cat-scratched.

Oh well ... sofa before you got ... um ... distressed ... you will be missed.

I THINK I WAS SUPPOSED TO BUY AN INDOOR TREE:
http://www.wayofcats.com/blog/when-cats-are-villains-from-a-james-bond-movie/14871

EQUAL TIME FOR EQUAL CREATURES WHO CAUSE DAMAGE:
http://voices.yahoo.com/how-stop-dogs-destroying-house-while-11144898.html

HAPPILY, THERE'S A PET-FREE BUZZFEED FOR THIS:
http://www.buzzfeed.com/erinlarosa/people-demonstrating-why-we-cant-have-nice-things

Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 10/20/13

What Chicago is talking about this week:

Our town's new baby dolphin.

Look, I know the rest of the country's all focused on the Panda Cam resuming at the national zoo (which, by the way, just makes me think that I'm not sure why that isn't all privatized in this modern day and age -- nothing against cute little pandas or anything, but should the government for which we are all paying really be in the zoo business?) ... but our Chicago's Brookfield Zoo dolphin community has grown by one calf this week, in case you missed the news.

Pandas may be all cuddly but they do get surprised by simple things like sneezing (as the youtube has well documented), and dolphins are hella smart, yo, so Chitown be representin'.  [Ummm ... did I just turn zoological competition into a hip-hop battle?]

BABY DOLPHIN AT THE BROOKFIELD ZOO:
http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/local/breaking/chi-dolphin-calf-born-at-brookfield-zoo-20131017,0,5600197.story

SURELY YOU'VE SEEN THIS BY NOW:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C7O59vdIKUM

I'M SURE THEY ARE SMARTER THAN SOME FOLKS I KNOW:
http://news.sciencemag.org/brain-behavior/2010/02/dolphin-person

Random Soapbox for Saturday 10/19/13

I don't mean to go off on a rant here, but ...

... old age is creeping up on me way too quickly.

The latest incident proving this to be true comes courtesy of my cell, where, in an attempt to be like the younger kids with their smart phones, I've downloaded one of those "app" thingies that approximates a yellow pad for jotting down notes at any time of day.  What with me micro-blogging every day, I use it to capture ideas as they strike me, especially since my brain buffets me with random bon mots on a continuous loop.

Sadly, though, I'm learning that jotting something down (or executing the new-fangled equivalent of that, app-wise) doesn't always mean I'll be able to understand that which I e-jotted.  Specifically, I found this phrase at the top of the list:  "I live in CT", and, upon reflection, I have absolutely no idea why that was important enough for me to remember.  I don't live in Connecticut and I have no plans to move to Connecticut and I'm pretty sure that I've only ever visited Connecticut whilst driving through on the way to visit my surrogate sister when she was in college in the Boston area over 20 years ago.

Of course, there's a chance that auto-correct played a role -- or that maybe CT doesn't stand for Connecticut (I mean, I was watching MTV's Real World Challenge Rivals [another attempt to stave off old age, by viewing what the kids watch] -- but then "I live in CT" would take on a whole different meaning and get all 'Silence of the Lambs' level of creepy).  Before when this has happened (nd yes, it has happened before), I simply turned to the interwebs to google search in hopes that I'll see something that jogs my aging memory, but even that exercise didn't take me anywhere (unless you count the Aerosmith instrumental that has that name from 'Pandora's Box', a collection I own but a song I didn't know was on the box set until today).

Bottom line ... it seems like I'm going need an app to help me translate the notes I put into my app.  Old age sucks.  Ugh!

WELL THIS IS LITERALLY WHAT I FOUND IN MY NOTES:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AF9RDfq-B2k

AND THIS OTHER CT DOESN'T MAKE MUCH SENSE IN CONTEXT:
http://thebatavian.com/timothy-walton/photo-mtv-real-world-reality-star-ct-city-slickers/38664

SO WAS IT ONE OF THESE OTHER CTS:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/CT

Random Flashback for Friday 10/18/2013

Happy 20th anniversary to the cast and crew and "creator" of LVC's fall 1993 Wig and Buckle production of "The Night of January 16th"!  (Where does the time go?)

[Okay, technically, I'm a fortnight late on these wishes, as our show was Oct 1-2-3 of that year twenty years ago.]

As masterfully directed by Rachel M, twenty-one cast members (some of whom are pictured in this audience view of the final bow during one of the three nights of performances) graced the Little Theatre of the Mund College Center (this was before the renovation and the name change) in an experience eerily preminiscient as to the modern day fascination with courtroom proceedings (I'd love to see it again through the eyes of a Nancy Grace, for instance).

Twelve members of the audience voted each night (does anyone recall the record for District Attorney Flint [my character] and that of Defense Attorney Stevens [the indefatigable performer Kimbery H]?) to basically answer Karen Andre's claim [as delivered by the multi-talented Karen H] that "One of us is lying and we both know which one."  (Of course I'm biased, but if you met Larry Regan [as portrayed by the one and only Rich G] in any capacity, well then you already knew the answer.)

[As a bonus (only on FB), I'm creating a quick photo album of a few pics from the show and the cast party and the day after the cast party ...]

Who's up for performing the show again somewhere live for the 25th anniversary in 2018?

Random Thought for Thursday 10/17/13

I've [blank]-ed some world class narcissists in my life to date.

[If this were Match Game, the Facebook Ephemera would all reply with "how narcissistic were they?" ... but, considering it is Facebook after all, the so called Ephemera might not even know the excitement of Gene Rayburn and his obscene microphone.]

Upon reflection (and the advice of counsel), I'm going to leave that up to your imagination and decide to fill in that blank with the verb "interact".  [Sorry folks, nothing salacious to see here ... well, at least not tonight, and not until I PUI again {posting-under-the-influence)].

Having been exposed to the best of the best in that class of people, I can recognize when that character trait starts to pop up in my own life.  [Go ahead, those of you who think that this whole blog set-up proves that it popped up thousands of posts ago.]

Which is all the long way to say ... I get special pleasure out of being able to play my own name during a game of Words With Friends.  Makes me all warm and tingly inside.  Just sayin' ...

IT'S QUITE SIMPLY A CLASSIC, OBSCENE MIC AND ALL:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SbakQgMiWAc

GET TESTED, KNOW YOUR STATUS:
http://www.salon.com/2013/08/27/stop_telling_me_youre_a_sensitive_introvert_partner/

WHY I CAN PLAY MY NAME, IN CASE YOU THOUGHT I WAS CHEATING:
http://www.munknee.com/what-do-gold-measurements-troy-ounce-and-karat-really-mean/

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 10/16/13

Concert Quest

Used in a sentence:  "Courtesy of a surprise invite to one venue which will celebrate a milestone personal event, followed by action taken regarding an upcoming getaway for a second venue, and with hopes that long term 2014 plans soon get settled that will allow the choice of a third venue ... I have now embarked on a new quest -- a Concert Quest."

To whit ... SUN OCT 27th in Baltimore MD, I will be extending my P Jam Jam in the best possible jamming way, by attending the 'Lighting Bolt' tour on a sold out night.  I thought all hope was lost, since I had missed the deadline for the fan club raffle (any surprise I'm in the fan club?  and that I'm an analog member due to my old age?  and that I missed a deadline?), and then, out of the blue, my college roommate Jon M invited me to attend.  As you'll see with the Friday flashbacks over the next few weeks/months, it's the 20th anniversary of our time together at LVC, so it's the perfect way to get a reunion out of it, and I couldn't be more grateful at what's going to happen -- a truly unexpected (and amazing) turn of events.  (Of course, as it was a surprise, I am literally driving in for a concert on Sunday night and turning around Monday morning for the return trip to Chicago!).

Then, on THU NOV 14th in Royal Oaks, MI, I will be enjoying the sounds of another band that released their latest album on the same day this week as Pearl Jam did -- when Toad the Wet Sprocket comes to town (well, to the suburbs of Detroit, which is where me and mine will be relocating for the weekend).  My copy of 'Constellation', their new release, is on its way to me (according to the fine folks at Amazon.com), so it will have arrived in plenty of time for me to get up to speed on the latest from this classic band from my college decade.

Now, if only I could figure out how to get the 2014 Cher dates locked down (you know, as in take out a loan, rob a bank, and, most importantly, figure out the best date and location to see her ... well ... any doubt it will be anything other than an ... extravaganza) ...

Concert Quest is officially ON!

BALTIMORE BABY!:
http://pearljam.com/tour

TOAD BABY!:
https://www.songkick.com/artists/49302-toad-the-wet-sprocket/calendar

CHER BABY!:
http://www.ticketmaster.com/Cher-tickets/artist/734742

Random Tune for Tuesday 10/15/13

An afternoon of panic (my local Target, which I checked on my lunch break, was sold out, in a frightening case of over-demanded & under-supplied) turned into an evening of bliss when today's release to which I've been counting down over the last ten weeks was located at a nearby independent retailer and procured by the mine half of "me and mine" and hand delivered to me an hour ago.

[NOTE:  I was informed that a shout-out on the blog was expected, and so now that obligation is discharged -- plus, I'm really really really grateful!].

[SECOND NOTE:  I am aware that the whole album has been available on the iTunes for the last week, but if you can't tell by my use of the word "album", I'm a little old for such new fangled sources by which to consume my media, and, I've also, as a matter of pride, never drank the iKoolAid.]

Of course, that also means I've only been able to give 'Lighting Bolt' a speed-listen so far, and so I've briefly heard the optimistic love song of 'Future Days' and have been flash-attracted to the apocalyptic end-of-times vibe of 'Infallible' (as you may know/recall, I did so *love* marking the days leading up to the Mayan faux-pocalypse last year in my last big [and much longer] countdown series).  I'm a little scared that I might relate a little too much to the nature/nurture debate seemingly underpinning 'My Father's Son' (I'll save any more commentary on that tune for my nonexistent therapy sessions) and I'm not in a mood to be saddened by the withered-love-on-the-vine message of 'Sleeping by Myself'.

So the tune I choose by which I will end this P Jam Jam is the one that might be the opening song of the current concert tour (based on what I've found on the youtube), and the song that I learned by text today is one of the favorites of one of my best friends back home in PA ... the one that captures how life goes on, day in, day out, highs and lows, to and fro ... or, as poet Vedder states ...

"We are here and then we go
My shadow left me long ago
Understand what we don't know
This might pass, this might last, this may grow
Easy come and easy go
Easy left me a long time ago"

And so ends the P Jam Jam!  (Or does it?  Come back tomorrow to see how the Jam will go on ...)

TO AND FRO ... TO AND FRO ...:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4IlucRMk5mM

Random Memorial for Monday 10/14/13

[Soon to be] Gone but not forgotten:  Dominick's in Chicago.

This past weekend, the parent company Safeway announced that they were leaving this local market as they had become a liability/money-loser.  I can't say I'm surprised, as a quick review of my own history of posts foretold this future.

On 1.31.11, I shared the secret that I had cheated in that ... "Instead of the twice a month trips to Jewel, it was Dominick's that took my grocery money [What can I say -- they sent me some really good coupons.]  Ultimately, I wasn't satisfied enough to make a shop-swap, so I'll be back to Jewel soon enough.  But I still have to deal with the fact that I led some cheap food store hussy take me away from the place where my bread normally gets buttered (or margarined nowadays)."

Later that year, on 9.25.11, I was listing out my activities of that day, and included this ... "Finally, it was on to grocery shopping at the new Mariano's Fresh Market.  Somehow, this vendor manages to capture the spirit of the quality of Whole Foods meat and fish counters (without the guilt that comes with the granola lifestyle), while steering away from the lackadaisical attitude of the typical Dominick's employee (I get unions  -- but those union employees at that grocery store don't seem to ever be happy about the protections their group has gotten for them) and with the customer appreciation card savings of a Jewel firmly intact."

And just as recently as 1.23.13, when discussing the food desert phenomenon in Chicago ... "Even here in my 'hood in Chitown, I can easily walk to three Jewels, a Whole Foods, a SuperTarget and a Walmart Express (not to mention being able to quickly drive to Strack and Van Til or -- the one that currently has most-favored-grocer status, Mariano's -- or, only in a pinch when I'm prepared to deal with bad service from folks who really don't want to be working, one of a few Dominick's)."

Last resort grocery shopping location of mine, will you even be missed?

THE FAREWELL ANNOUNCEMENT:
http://articles.chicagotribune.com/2013-10-11/business/chi-dominicks-parent-leaving-chicago-20131010_1_dominick-safeway-inc-chicago-area-stores

INDUSTRY COVERAGE OF THE ANNOUNCEMENT:
http://www.popai.com/2013/10/11/safeway-announces-dominicks-leaving-chicago/

LOCATION WITH MOST-FAVORED-GROCER STATUS CURRENTLY:
http://www.marianos.com/

Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 10/13/13

What Chicago is talking about this week:

The marathon, baby!

What more could you ask for today -- beautiful weather for all the beautiful running people ... a new course record set ... no safety/security issues (Boston strong yo!) ... and no crazy traffic jams on LSD on the way out of town today to go have brunch with the family in Valpo Indiana.

I mean, more power to all of the participants and all of the cheerer-ons by the wayside, but I'm just enjoying the experience vicariously through all of the Facebook updates. And there were many of them.  It seemed like if you were in/from the area and weren't running it (and congrats to Matty F, a former Kaplan employee who worked in the same center as I did, who did it for the 9th time, according to his FB status update), you were supporting someone who was.  (Well, except for me, who was busy in the next state stuffing his face at an all-you-can-eat Sunday buffet ... but I did buy new walking sneakers afterwards for my own exercise routine, if that counts for anything.)

Anyway -- congrats to all for their outstanding achievements and congrats to a city that rallies together for such an outstanding event!

NEW RECORDS!:
http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/local/breaking/chi-chicago-marathon-20131013,0,1559168.story?page=1

MANY WERE NO DOUBT THINKING OF BOSTON TODAY:
http://www.wcvb.com/chronicle/monday-october-14-boston-strong-reunited/-/12523032/22376412/-/tdjneh/-/index.html

TODAY'S RACE CAPTURED IN DOZENS OF PHOTOS:
http://abclocal.go.com/wls/gallery?section=news/local&id=9285159&photo=1

Random Soapbox for Saturday 10/12/13

I don't mean to go off on a rant here, but ...

... I want my Lebanon back.

I'm not saying I want to go back to Lebanon necessarily (although I do love to visit and I'm way overdue for one -- it's just that my life is elsewhere and has been for about fifteen years) ... but I do want to reclaim its popularity from those doofuses on Discovery Channel's 'Amish Mafia' (and yes, doofus does almost rhyme with Stoltzfus, and yes, I am mostly looking at you, Mr. Stolzfus, and your moniker of 'Lebanon' Levi that has tarnished my hometown).

To be clear, I get it.  Amish have been hot in entertainment (again, 'Witness' anyone?) for the last few seasons ('Breaking Amish', 'Amish: Out of Order', Vanilla Ice Goes Amish', etc.).  But as someone who spent many a day at Roots or Green Dragon and for whom Intercourse and Blue Ball and Paradise are actual towns I've driven through on a semi-regular basis, I have to tell you that it seems to be a little too much like a mockery of a faith (or faiths, once you add in the Mennonite and Brethren subplots of late).  Have I heard of crazy barn parties, where a repressed youth sometimes go a little too wild?  Sure I have.  Have I ever been to one?  No, I have not.  Do I think that that local lore should be a jumping off point for plot lines about weed growing in the Amish fields, and mental illness being more prevalent due to inbreeding off of one master blood line, and lonely farmers turning more than a loving eye towards their farm animals?  That's where I think it's all going too far.

Admittedly, who am I to take it so personally?  If a bunch of fools want to get together and "play television", and it employs some locals, well then, that's good for the local economy.  And if the Fredericksburg public library raises funds courtesy of a cast member, then more power to the good cause (my daddy used to run a chicken plant in that town... and my momma used to work there ... so I have a special place in my heart for that place, what with it being so key to my origin story).

But it's just so "cheesily" done.  Actors who swear they aren't actors but who have trouble delivering their basic lines and rising above such awkwardly forced faux-reality show tropes.  And to hear them struggle to say the lines in PA Dutch, oh my.  The last straw for me was the season 2 finale, a just plain awful staged show about how this whole thing isn't a staged show that clearly came off as a more obviously staged show than any of the others.  Ugh.  Ugh.  And another ugh.

Courtesy of that last show, there's clearly no hope for season 3.  Storylines purported to be featured -- a new young gingy Amish named Flip will shake things up all new millennial style at the Amish raves (did I really see hut-slut-wear and a blow up doll being stuffed with a beer funnel?), a subplot about Deliverance-looking Kentucky barefoot Amish with weapons who will wreak havoc in Amish country ('cause they are hard core Amish down there [cue banjo music]), another shot of Perry County Prison (truth be told, everyone is always allowed to make fun of anything referencing Perry County -- the original place where "men are men and sheep are scared") ... and a where-the-Hoffa is the pretty boy Brethren boy who was caught shtupping the Bishop's daughter (who, creepily, looked like he was twelve years old).

Look, I just want my hometown of Lebanon to be known for what it was when I was little -- a place for great uniquely flavored bologna and the birthplace of Sam Bowie.  Hell, I'll even take the "Town Hall that almost killed Arlen Specter" as Lebanon's legacy over this idiotic drivel.

Shame shame shame on you Discovery Channel.  (And shame on me for watching both seasons, and for likely taking on Season 3 -- but to be clear, I'll be "hate-watching" that season [as all the kids do nowadays].)

Give me back my Leb'nun (the way the real natives say it)!

THE HOMETOWN PAPER COVERS HE WHO BEARS MY HOMETOWN'S NAME:
http://www.ldnews.com/ci_22355681/who-is-lebanon-levi-discovery-channels-amish-mafia

THIS IS A REAL SHOW ... NO ... REALLY!:
http://www.nydailynews.com/entertainment/tv-movies/barn-wild-vanilla-ice-heads-amish-country-article-1.1481851

I'LL EVEN TAKE THIS LEGACY:
http://www.npr.org/blogs/itsallpolitics/2013/08/07/209919206/5-memorable-moments-when-town-hall-meetings-turned-to-rage

Random Posting for Penn State 10/12/13

Here are 9 Nittany Nuggets from today's game!

1.)  #OTOTOTOT #nowthatsafootballgame
2.)  Good thing I saw this game live and didn't DVR it for later, as I would have missed the last (and most important) 75 minutes!
3.)  Good thing we have a bye week again next week, as I think this party's gonna last awhile!
4.)  Ballsy move there, O'Brien!  Gotta love it!!
5.)  Atta boys to FICKEN ... and to HACKENBERG ... and to ROBINSON ... and all around!
6.)  And Mr. Announcerman, that was a little dickish of you poking fun of ROBINSON in those last two OT plays and saying "oh, he should have caught those".  Did you forget his awesome catch that got us to OT in the first place?
7.)  And speaking of announcermen, I swear I heard one of them say at the beginning of the game that he HACKENBERG "had a big arm and was a gym rat and was bright, which can sometimes be a detriment in this sport".  [Is that why I never played the game -- is it that I'm too bright as well?]
8.)  I recognize that I'm not the most sophisticated of fan, but does the new bright green line for "field goal range" really help me as a viewer (not that I want them to get rid of the first down line or anything) ...
9.)  Sometimes I forget that HACKENBERG is only 18, but nothing made me remember it more than when they showed the Michigan kicker GIBBONS, who, as a fifth year redshirt, looked to me like he was in his late 30's.

In closing, thanks fans for the visual beauty of a white-out after the sun goes down (except for the pink breast cancer awareness zone ... and those three lonely MI fans in the sea [snow?] of white who clearly wanted to make a statement) ... and the countdown to our next post-season game that may or may not be as late as 2016 stands at no more than 42 more games (but may be a bit less)!

"IMAGINARY BOUNDARIES NOW COME TO LIFE" THE COMPANY SAYS:
http://www.nj.com/mercer/index.ssf/2013/09/hamilton_technology_company_changes_the_way_sports_are_broadcast.html

IS 34 HIS NUMBER OR HIS AGE ... JUST SAYIN':
http://www.mgoblue.com/sports/m-footbl/mtt/brendan_gibbons_470886.html

I THOUGHT WE WERE MAYBE GOING FOR THE OT RECORD:
http://scores.espn.go.com/ncf/recap?gameId=233050096

Random Flashback for Friday 10/11/13

In the last few weeks I've been hanging on to Summer 1993 pics for as long as I could, so it's time (some might say past time), to put something up more representative of fall, since, you know, it is kind of the middle of October and all.

So here's the first of many celebrating the twentieth anniversary of the 93-94 school year at LVC.  Lots and lots of things happened during that time, and, don't worry, I'm not about to reflect on all of them over the next few weeks/months.

But I can start with this photo (I can't disclose the location, as it was a place we all used to go to after dark when it was officially closed, and since I'm not sure about the statute of limitations when it comes to trespassing on government property [oops, I might have already said too much]) and I can assure you that these three were just some of the lives that were all interwoven during that school year (and beyond).  Standing upright are my college roommate Jon M (not my first at LVC, but my best [and therefore my longest]) and (as of that time) acting scene partner Kim H (more to come about that next week -- and about her in a few more flashbacks along the way).  In the middle imitating a bat?  That's Gully (Rich G), who also will appear in quite a few pictures ahead (as he was my LVC little brother, and especially since he's been waiting for these flashbacks for five years since I joined the Facebook, and I told him he had to wait until 2013 to see them).

Rest assured ... we've only just begun ...

Random Thought for Thursday 10/10/13

Warning:  the judgiest of you might find this uncouth, or premature, or selfish, or self-centered, or some other characterization that I haven't named outright  ... but, look, when you run across something so perfectly suited to be a gift for yourself, and with holidays coming in just under 50 days (for my Jewish Thanks-mukkah friends -- what are you doing this year, lighting candles around the turkey?) or 75 days (for my traditional Christians and/or Santa Claus lovers regardless of religion) or 100 days (for my Serbian and other Orthodox folks, which, speaking of gifting, is also the same day as my birthday [I've always shared my personal celebration with the Ukrainian Jesus]), you simply have to put it out there, all Oprah/The Secret style.

I'm not talking about new music (I already have the latest Cher album, I'm going to get Pearl Jam's 'Lightning Bolt' in about 112 hours, I'll surely have found the brand new Toad the Wet Sprocket release coming out the same day but maybe not available at my Target but certainly able to be purchased when they come to town for a concert on 11.16) ... and although I'm looking for 2014 Cher concert tickets, I don't expect anyone out there to get a personal loan to afford those seats (something I'm now considering) ... nor do I need any new socks or underwear or wifebeaters (which, surprise!, is my basic work from home "uniform" when I'm not in meetings on camera) ... and I keep bacon in the apartment at all times (what with it being perishable, it's key to constantly be eating it and then replacing it, and not leaving its supply up to chance) ...

Instead, courtesy of last night's episode of ABC's new comedy "Back in the Game", currently squeezed between insta-classics "The Middle" and "Modern Family", I now have seen a toothpick necklace (what's shown in the picture comes close, but doesn't quite do justice to the prop that was on display last night).

Come on, those of you who know me well , could you think of anything more perfect for me?  PS -- if you check out my 20+ year old pictures on the Facebook, you'll see I prefer(red) gold bling over silver, should you be reaching for your wallets to make said purchase.

Happy upcoming holidays to you and yours!  My wish for you -- beyond good health and general happiness and world peace and what not -- may you get everything so clearly made for you as this item is for me!

THE EPISODE IN WHICH MY PERFECT GIFT WAS PRESENTED:
http://thecelebritycafe.com/feature/2013/10/back-game-recap-play-hard-or-go-home

PLEASE JUST MAKE SURE IT'S FULLY FUNCTIONAL:
http://www.hancholo.com/index.php/shop/new-releases/necklaces/toothpick.html

AND IF YOU'RE LOOKING AHEAD TO WHAT TO GET ME ON VALENTINE'S DAY:
http://thechive.com/2012/03/20/make-your-own-bacon-roses-21-photos/

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 10/9/13

Just do it.

Used in a sentence:  "Okay folks, those of you who have already seen 'Art and Copy' know this, but the next time you provide inspiration to whomever with the phrase 'Just do it', please bear in mind that it's origin story is that it came from an ad company that slightly modified the final words of a serial killer who was being executed by a firing squad in Utah, and said 'Let's do it' before he was shot."

Surprise!  It was not Forrest Gump running across country who coined the phrase as the movies would have you believe -- it's a good old fashioned capital punishment endorsement you're kind of making each time you exclaim the phrase (his was the first death after the Supreme Court reinstated it).

Just do it, indeed!

WHAT THEY PROBABLY DIDN'T WANT YOU TO KNOW:
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/08/20/business/media/20adco.html?_r=0

HOW THEY WOULD RATHER YOU THINK OF IT:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=01HBrud1AHI

JUST DO IT, ALREADY, INDEED:
http://www.biography.com/people/gary-gilmore-11730320

Random Tune for Tuesday 10/8/13

One week from now, I'll have in my hands the latest release from Pearl Jam since the last release from Pearl Jam, which means we are finally to "Backspacer" in my ongoing P Jam Jam count down.

Although I refuse to play favorites, I do love me some "Backspacer", and I can understand why it was nominated for a Grammy as it represents how this group of guys can just get better and better as time passes.  In the multi-dimensional presentation that they've become known for in their advanced releases, we get the fast paced opening addictive duo speaking to addiction of "Gonna See My Friend" and "Got Some" and the out-Coldplaying strength of building soaring chords in "Unthought Known".

Clearly from the accompanying image, it's another song duo (even if the tracks aren't right next to each other) of "Just Breathe" and "The End" that are my picks for tonight.  And, happily, Eddie agrees with me that they are companion songs, as evidenced by the Youtube video I found from Seattle 2009 where he places them back to back in performance.  How can you not get all choked up in the "live in the moment" instructions in the first song that speaks of how life is all too fleeting, foreshadowing the final cries of the loved one leaving in the latter.  Here's to being one of the lucky ones who learns before it is too late to ... just breathe ... and to appreciate the loves in his life before ... the end.

"Oh I'm a lucky man
To count on both hands the ones I love
Some folks just have one
Yeah others they've got none"

LIGHTNING BOLT ARRIVES in JUST 1 WEEK!

PERFECTLY TIMED FOR A P JAM JAM THAT IS WRAPPING UP:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=990mPRb3T50

Random Memorial for Monday 10/7/13

Gone but not forgotten:  the bathroom vent fan.

Look, I'll try to be careful and walk the line here between TMI and sharing my thoughts (although, let's face it, it's not like I haven't crossed that line before [and if double negatives confuse you, that means I most definitely have]), but this old Chicago apartment building is sorely lacking in the fan-in-the-bathroom department.

Fans belong in that room of the house for obvious reasons (for instance, to cover up the smells and sounds of the activities that take place there), but also because of something I may have said before -- when I try to picture the various hellish events that will be part and parcel of the afterlife hanging out with Satan, having to sweat whilst defecating takes the top spot on the list of punishments to which some of us might be subjected.

Fresh circulating noisy air helping me through my toilet time, you are sorely missed.

MAYBE BOB VILLA CAN DO IT FOR ME!:
http://www.thisoldhouse.com/toh/how-to/intro/0,,689843,00.html

MAYBE "SWEATING WHILE POOPING" IS A SERIOUS THING:
http://ehealthforum.com/health/stomach-cramping-and-sweating-while-pooping-t240529.html

BILLY GRAHAM TALKS ABOUT HELL (AND DOESN'T MENTION BOWEL MOVEMENTS):
http://www.billygraham.org/articlepage.asp?articleid=4130

Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 10/6/13

What Chicago is talking about this week:

Eh -- pretty much same old same old.  A government shut down (and bound to get worse before it gets better if we can't get our payday loan type stuff figured out), a few more deaths of the expendable generation (not exactly my characterization per se, but how I'm realizing they must be viewed by community leaders since so little is being done to stop the South Side Slaughter in Chitown), some flooding caused by a surprise heavy storm (at least it's not 40 inches of snow like a few states over on the map).

Looking for a brief escape from all that scandaloso?  Then look no further than my ongoing short story, which today had the entirety of chapter 7 added to the Facebook photo album and the "completed chapters" link on the blog.  Hadn't run across this side project of mine yet?  It's a little creative output I've wanted to do ever since joining the Facebook a few years back -- tell a story a status update at a time.  Of course, while that's fun for me, that might be maddening to those who just get a glimpse of things every so often, so I created the photo album and the completed chapters link as a mechanism to address that scenario.

The story itself -- it's basically a rumination on my answer to that standard party icebreaker question of "if you could have any super power, what would it be"?  The main character, Alan, is a graduating college student who discovers that his burgeoning super skill is to be able to absorb the painful memories of those with whom he comes into actual physical contact.  Truth be told, the story has just started, and on the horizon, Alan will be figuring out the rules attached to his skill, exploring the consequences of being special and what happens to those with whom he's interacted, finding out that there's much more to his "origin story", and eventually getting down to the brass tacks of getting a sidekick (other than his new pit bull puppy that's already been introduced) and discovering the super villain he'll need to battle.

Or, said another way, chapter 7 may finally be finished ... but there's many many more chapters to come, so stay tuned ... or tune in, eh?

THE "PHOTO ALBUM" VERSION OF LOREM IPSUM:
https://www.facebook.com/troy.neidermyer/media_set?set=a.4256647034768.1073741826.1843633569&type=3

THE "COMPLETED CHAPTERS" LINK OF LOREM IPSUM (NOW UP TO CHAP 7):
http://capcognition.blogspot.com/2013/05/lorem-ipsum-aloysius-angelasia-archives_527.html

OR, YOU KNOW, THE NON FICTIONAL STUFF:
http://www.nbcchicago.com/news/local/1-Dead-8-Wounded-in-Overnight-Chicago-Shootings-226583281.html

Random Posting for Penn State 10/5/13

Here are 9 Nittany Nuggets from today's game!

1.)  First, to clear things up, I'm actually posting this almost a week after the actual game (the blog lets me post-date my posts), since it was on the DVR as I was entertaining company last weekend and I've just now watched it.
2.)  I was kind of surprised that I hadn't seen the score on the Facebook ... well, until I watched the game, and then realized why people weren't commenting last weekend.
3.)  Which, in turn, brings me to this shirt, which is cocky to begin with, and which is probably on sale now that the game is over.
4.)  In retrospection, could it be that we were out-nascarred?  And does anyone know if that is how you spell the past tense of "to nascar" on the football field?
5.)  I'm still gonna give an "atta boy" FICKEN ... and blame the snappers.
6.)  And I'm still gonna say "thank you Mr. ROBINSON", as, despite the end result and the 4th Quarter in general, he was doing some nice things out there.
7.)  So until this game, we were doing well always in the red zone with a score ... and both before and after this game, we're not so great at 3rd down conversions (see, I am listening to the announcermen, especially when they throw graphics on the screen).
8.)  I so wanted the mascot for the Hoosiers to be "Hoosier Daddy", although I'm not sure what a DNA testing suit would look like.
9.)  So ... that's not how anyone wanted the start of conference play to start.

In closing, thanks Hoosiers for all the pink on the field during the game that showed your support for breast cancer research ... and the countdown to our next post-season game that may or may not be as late as 2016 stands at no more than 43 more games (but may be a bit less)!

HOW IS THIS STILL FOR SALE ON THE INTERWEBS:
http://www.spreadshirt.com/never-lost-to-indiana-C3376A10595427

MORE ON THE PINK-NESS AT INDIANA U:
http://www.idsnews.com/news/story.aspx?id=94529

WHY CAN'T THEY SPONSOR ALL THE SPORTS PROGRAMS AT IU:
http://www.hoosierdaddybbqsauce.com/

Random Soapbox for Saturday 10/5/13

I don't mean to go off on a rant here, but ...

... USA Today, you threw me for a damn loop this week, what with your unannounced sudden doubling in price.

First things first, to the little girl behind the counter at the 7-11 who told me on Monday that I didn't have enough money to buy the paper because it was $2.00 now instead of $1.00 -- I kind of apologize that I discounted your behind the counter knowledge and gave you a dirty look when you showed me the numbers in the corner.  You see, it's just that I'm always right, and so when someone attempts to prove that I'm not right, it's a bit jarring.  In that situation in which we found ourselves, I would have preferred that you had just nodded your head, and affirmed my truth and either discounted the paper to the dollar that I was expecting to pay or just pitched in and matched my contribution in order to allow me to leave your store with the security of knowing that I was continuing down my path of always being right.  Instead, you told me that "price went up yesterday", which was technically wrong since this publication doesn't have a weekend edition, but whatevs.  I came back ten minutes later after doubling my paper money, and made the purchase from you, my chastener.

Second things second, to you elitists out there who are judging me for purchasing a publication so plebeian, you can just suck it and go back to your Sunday New York Times crossword (where "plebeian" might just be the answer to one of your questions).  I like the pretty colors and the headline based stories and the nuggets of knowledge ... so neener-neener-neener to you and yours.  Besides, in modern times, I consume my news across many different platforms, and the USA Today is the perfect fit for me for some things, in particular keeping up on basic Sports information.  Look, I'll never be *that* guy who gets engaged in statistics and fantasy this or that or who experiences blood flow to his private parts when he watches Sports Center, and I just need to know enough superficial sporty facts to be involved in small talk with strangers.

Third things third, I should have known something like this might happen, although it was the shock of the cost having doubled in one day that caught me off guard.  I mean, I'm used to stamps and petrol creeping up in price, and I expected my daily paper to have the same trajectory.  My mistake was that I put the USA Today in that category of consumables, and I should have compared it to the cost of tipping strippers.  Meaning -- I used to dole out my appreciation of their performances in singles, until I found out that one mocked me for having only given a dollar.  Now, because I'm a conscientious stripper tipper, I always make sure to give two or three dollar bills at once, fanned out as I approach them to make sure that I'm not ridiculed.  For perspective, I don't anticipate that I will ever be the kind to "make it rain", because a)  I am not actively trying to establish any hip hop street cred and b)  I grew up with the cautionary tales told by Billy Joel that warned me about how, if I was too much of a "Big Shot" when out and about, I'd wake up with "my head on fire and my eyes too bloody to see" (note:  it's always why I don't ever go to Sears to buy paintings with anyone with whom I'm in a relationship, because we all know how that ended for Brenda and Eddie).

Bottom line -- USA Today, you win the battle against my bottom line, and I will now begin to budget $10 instead of $5 weekly for the pretty colors you introduce into my day.

THE LAST PRICE INCREASE WAS JUST A QUARTER FIVE YEARS AGO:
http://gannettblog.blogspot.com/2013/09/usat-cover-price-said-doubling-to-2-on.html

STRIPPER ETIQUETTE, BECAUSE YOU SHOULD KNOW BEFORE YOU GO:
http://www.thefrisky.com/2010-02-17/girl-talk-strip-club-etiquette-from-a-stripper/

BECAUSE WE ALL SHOULD LEARN FROM WHAT HAPPENED TO BRENDA & EDDIE:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JUz48xw_OiM

Random Flashback for Friday 10/4/13

20 years ago around this time, in 1993, I had left Uniontown and returned to LVC and my undergrad studies.

But, in my weekly Friday series of photos, I've been drawing out the memories of that summer as long as possible, and this week is no exception (although it will be the last photo in this series before I start posting fall 93 LVC photos next week, I promise).

Back then, I interrupted my undergrad studies ostensibly for a theater internship with my uncle's company.  But, my 18 months out in western PA gave me some of that and so much more.  I've previously posted about the jobs I had there (I transferred to the local Hills, I worked at a local haunted house, I ever so briefly had a talent agent in Columbus and auditioned for a McDonald's commercial, I waited tables at a small cafe, I started my own theater company out of spite after a falling out with my cousin, etc. etc.), and the people I met (including the kids from the local high school's graduating class that took me in as a "mascot" of sorts [what with me being a late bloomer and all], and co-workers at all of those jobs that helped a 21 year old boy act like the teenager he hadn't quite been free to be before).

But most importantly in the time I was there, I met the people who ended up being like family to me.  I've made many a reference to my "surrogate" grandmother JoAnn (RIP), and I can't close this chapter without also remembering my "older brother" influence of the time, Darren L, here pictured in late summer 1993 with his wife Dina.  [Interestingly enough, he was about to perform for yet another theater company that had issues with my cousin's business sense -- ah, the drama of those who put on drama.]  Darren taught me many things, and helped turn me into the man I am today courtesy of dozens of conversations over late night card games.

And it's him and those like him that represent how life takes you to unexpected places and doesn't tell you in advance about all of the important things that will happen to you while you're there ... a lesson learned well twenty years ago to embrace change.

Random Thought for Thursday 10/3/13

Yes, I wore my sunglasses today for my 'hood walk, even though it was drizzling.  ['Hood walks are now part of my lunch hour routine, since I'm on a mission to lose 40 lbs between last month and sometime next year when I expect to attend my 25th high school reunion.]

And yes, I had retorts ready were I to be mocked.  To whit:

"So what?  I'm cooler than you."

"Get off my back.  I don't want my contacts to be washed away!"

"Mind your own business -- the shades are little umbrellas for my eyes."

"Look, dude.  I'm an optimist, and I'm hoping the sun might come out after all.  And wow, do you ruin the spirit of everything with which you come into contact?"

And, since, for part of the walk, I was nearby on Broadway, "Nobody - no - NObody ... is gonna RAIN on MY parade."

Of course, no one did mock me as expected (at least not audibly or to my face), and so my retorts ended up all hypothetical.  Oh well ...

THE BOBBY DARIN VERSION OF COURSE:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6nZW7e46sfA

TOO BAD MY 'HOOD WALK WASN'T AT NIGHT:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NvHH6hGWp0g

ONLY WHITE SUNGLASSES MADE THE DOUCHEBAG LIST (AS DID WIFEBEATERS):
http://www.weouthere.net/2012/06/10-things-douchebags-do/

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 10/2/13

Scuppered.

Used in a sentence:  "I learned a new word, and just in time too:  scuppered."

I looove to add words to my vocab (thanks again Mrs. Mills for my 9th AND 12th grade Word Wealth exercises that created a life long love of a large lexicon) ... and when I saw the headline on the Reuters news app on my phone last weekend about how Berlusconi had scuppered the Italian government by pulling out his ministers, I first thought that it was a typo or a malapropism (and that the reporter intended the word scuttled), so I actually went looking on the interwebs to verify what it was and was pleased to find that it was an old Naval term in the vein of "purposefully sinking the ship".

Full circle -- I now get to use the new word I learned -- and not when talking to others about the poor Italian government (especially since that occasion hasn't happened yet), but instead, thankfully, when discussing how our own government got scuppered this week!  Yay!  (Well, "yay" for having an opportunity to use my new word ... not so "yay" for those who are suffering due to the furloughs and the shutdowns courtesy of  leadership that prefers scuppering to leading ...)

THE SOURCE FOR THIS ADDITION TO MY LEXICON:

http://www.reuters.com/article/2013/09/04/us-italy-berlusconi-idUSBRE9830Q320130904

TO SEE THIS IN ACTION, WATCH "RAISING HOPE", FRIDAYS ON FOX:

http://www.fun-with-words.com/malapropisms.html

I WOULD HAVE KNOWN THIS MUCH SOONER HAD I READ THIS BEFORE:

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Scuppers-The-Sailor-Dog/108115719216859

Random Tune for Tuesday 10/1/13

Woo-hoo!

It's October!

I'm eight weeks into my P Jam Jam countdown and therefore very close to the end, what with this week being the 8th studio album release from which I'll choose tonight's tune -- the album that always makes me hungry for homemade guacamole.

And what tune do I pick?  The ones that rage against the war (this was released in 2006, during the Iraq War) or against economic downfall (sadly, "Unemployable" ended up being prescient of times in the Great Recession and beyond)?  Or -- since anyone who knows me and knew me during the end of 2012, knows and knew that I also enjoy counting down to the apocalypse, so "World Wide Suicide" seems like a natural fit for a "random" selection.

But no, the song choices I've made over the last few weeks clearly point to me choosing something more introspective and hyper-emotional (because P Jam delivers it all, yo).  So what?  "Parachutes", "Come Back" or "Inside Job"?   All in the running, but none compare to the feeling I get when driving alone on a road, with everything I came from and everything that made me and everyone I knew in the rearview mirror, quite literally behind me ... and everything ahead of me unknown but fully embraced.  To be clear, I'm grateful for all that came before, and I've got nothing against my past that has brought me to my present (and I sure do love to visit and I'm overdue to return) ... but I'm also ever so inspired by the freedom to pick up and try all things new.

And every time I return, it's always only to leave again, and these words from "Gone" are the ones that speak to me the most ...

The lights of the city, they only look good when I'm speeding
I wanna leave em all behind me because this time I'm gone
Gone, going for it all this time, gone
In the far off distance
As my taillights fade
No one to witness but they will someday
Fell like a question is forming
And the answers
I will be what I could be
Once I get out of this town
Gone, going for it all, this time I'm gone

Introspectively emotional enough for you?

LIGHTING BOLT ARRIVES in JUST 2 WEEKS!