Random Wordplay for Wednesday 12/28/16

Zion curtain.

Used in a sentence:  "Contrary to what you might think, the Zion curtain is NOT a proposal to address the mess that is the middle east NOR is it a decoration tip for the almost completed holiday season but it IS what you can expect in restaurants in Utah that opened after 2012 -- a minimum seven foot wall shielding innocent eyes from the mixing of alcohol into drinks."

If you're a regular reader, you already know I have a one person crusade against the privacy shields at my local Publix, ostensibly hiding boobie cleavage from young ones (young ones who then go slaughter avatars of each other in their video games ... but I digress), so you can only imagine the frustration I feel at this little legislative gem.

Of course, I know, I know ... religion rules in Utah, and the church/state separation in other parts of the country is nigh unto non-existent there.  But if the geniuses behind 'South Park' proved nothing, it's that it's socially acceptable to mock a Mormon every now and again (see also:  "president"-elect Trump meeting Romney early in his transition).  To that end, it's time to tell folks to stop getting their temple undergarments in a twist, and that real life has to be lived in front of, not behind, the Zion curtain.

Count me among those who say, "Utah legislators, tear down that Zion wall ... I mean curtain!"

COULD IT BE THE NEXT POPULAR PROTESTABLE TREND:
http://www.latimes.com/nation/la-na-utah-zion-curtain-20161111-story.html

MORE ALCOHOL FUN IN UTAH (THAT WOULD MAKE A QUAKER FROM PA UPSET):
http://philadelphiafreepress.com/behind-the-zion-curtain-here-are-utah-liquor-laws-that-would-even-drive-p5666-1.htm

UTAH ISN'T ALONE WHEN IT COMES TO LAUGHABLE LIQUOR LAWS:
http://time.com/money/4048973/states-with-crazy-alcohol-liquor-laws/

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 12/21/16

Over, Done With, Gone.

Used in a sentence:  "Who knew that I'd find the best self-help advice for modern times in the 1983 classic 'Cujo', but I'll be damned if I wasn't drawn to the way that the [spoiler alert ahead] faithless mom and failure of a dad dealt with their overly sensitive boy and his nightmares about the monster in the closet -- repeating, over and over again, the phrase 'Over, Done With, Gone'."

Maybe it's a mantra YOU need to hear right now so that YOU can deal with the monsters in YOUR closet?

Over, Done With, Gone.  Over, Done With, Gone.  Over, Done With, Gone.

FROM THE MOVIE:
http://www.subzin.com/quotes/M8959db9a/Cujo/Over%2C+done+with%2C+gone.

WAIT, WHAT? CUJO IS GETTING REMADE:
http://www.cinemablend.com/new/Cujo-Remake-Title-Isn-t-Going-Sit-With-Some-Fans-72427.html

THIS SONG HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE MOVIE (I THINK):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vpr6tm02L6w

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 12/14/16

Madder than a mosquito in a mannequin factory.

Used in a sentence:  "As overheard in a recent reality competition show, and as apparently attributed to a certain cable company employee named 'Larry', and as corrected by me with regards to the proper then/than choice in the image of the phrase I found on the google, and as applicable to any situation of perturbation in which you find yourself nowadays, please feel free to announce that you are 'madder than a mosquito in a mannequin factory' to whomever about whatever."

Because, once you think about it, that mosquito would be pretty darn mad ... and there's a lot of things in the world today that can get you to advance to *that* particular level.

Wet hens, step aside.  There's a new anger metaphor in town.

CREDITING THE SOURCE:
http://larrythecableguyjokes.blogspot.com/2012/06/larry-cable-guy-jokes_24.html

MORE SAYINGS YOU NEED TO START SAYING NOW!:
https://wanderwisdom.com/travel-destinations/Funny-Southern-Sayings-and-Southern-Expressions

LIKE GRIEF, ANGER HAS STAGES:
http://thoughtcatalog.com/kirsten-chen/2012/07/explaining-the-stages-of-anger/

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 12/7/16

Florida Baptism (Pedestrian Edition)

Used in a sentence:  "Today, I experienced my 'Florida Baptism (Pedestrian Edition)' when that guy in this picture used that car in that photo to hit me as I was in the crosswalk crossing the street."

Walking two hours a day, six days a week, it was bound to happen (half of those are supposed to be on a bike, but it's always in the shop with a flat tire from all the debris on the side of the road that I have to drive through) ... and I shouldn't go any further without clarifying that I am just fine.  "Hit" was more like "clip" or "swipe" -- a distinction said driver was trying to make with the policeman, who instead correctly focused on the fact that his car made contact with my body.

Long story kind of short -- I had the right of way, was halfway across the street IN the crosswalk with the little flashing white man on the pole egging me on and the driver turned left behind me from the road to right, cutting me off in such a way that his driver's side back door hit my shoulder.  I kept on going on my walk, originally intending to just chalk it up to "damn Florida drivers" ... but it turns out that his contact with me happened in front of a school bus, and the bus driver was a witness.  She got his license plate number and tried to get my attention.  When I didn't respond to her (I had noted his car had turned into the parking lot of the ESOL school, and I assumed him to be some kid, so I was watching to make sure it wasn't waiting for me a block away), she then went to the security guard on the other side of the street at the high school and gave HIM the information and had HIM wait for me to pass by on my way home.

I told the school security guard that I was shocked, but okay, and he said that "right is right" and that I should consider calling it in, especially since it was a high traffic intersection full of school kids many hours of the day.  On a hunch, I went to the parking lot of the ESOL school and matched up the license plate to the car in the picture.  Having not yet decided if I was going to report anything, I took a few pics of the car (including my "smudge" mark on the door where it hit me, what with how much I sweat when I walk), and someone went in the building and alerted the driver.  He came out ... we exchanged some words ... and he wasn't taking accountability for his actions.  When his reply to me was "so what", I knew then I'd be calling the police.

The bus driver witness showed up shortly before the policeman did, and all parties were interviewed.  I insisted I was fine, with just a sore shoulder, but that I wanted to make it official so that he understood he had to change his ways in order to save a future kid from being run over.  The driver's defense was that he didn't hear the act of running into me because he was playing music loudly, that he didn't "hit" me but he just "swiped" me, that he didn't see me (despite the police person saying I was kind of a big guy and despite him having told the security guard that he had "calculated" for me a bit earlier in our conversations), that the light was green (as if he had the right of way) AND that he had driven to school five years without hitting anyone (as if that was something for which he should be congratulated).

Bottom line ... I spent the morning in a way I didn't expect, and he ended his morning with a citation for hitting a pedestrian in a school zone.

Or, in other words, I have now had my Florida Baptism (Pedestrian Edition).  And I lived to tell the tale (for now)!

THE LAST TIME I DISCUSSED FLORIDA BAPTISM:
http://capcognition.blogspot.com/search?q=baptism

IF I WERE THE SUING TYPE:
http://www.justinziegler.net/does-a-pedestrian-hit-by-a-car-in-florida-have-a-case/

IT'S A DANGEROUS WORLD OUT THERE:
http://www.usnews.com/news/politics/articles/2016-03-08/early-data-suggests-pedestrian-deaths-surged-in-2015

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 11/30/16

Bear Dog.

Used in a sentence:  "Just recently found in the fossil drawers of the Field Museum back in my former hometown of Chicago:  cute little bear dog bones."

Without getting too science-y, it appears that there was a misclassification of something found decades ago, and now that wrong has been corrected and the bones were moved to the amphicyonids family.  That being said, the bear dog is not the animal from which all bears and all dogs come ... but it does point to a "common ancestor" farther back.

Or at least that's what we're saying until the next time someone claims an error and reclassifies things again.

THE LATEST NEWS:
http://blogs.discovermagazine.com/deadthings/2016/10/11/found-the-newest-old-unbearably-cute-beardog/#.WD9vsrIrLIU

ALTHOUGH THE BEAR DOG CONCEPT HAS BEEN AROUND AWHILE:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V9G_XoACd2s

WHERE TO GET ALL THE DINOSAUR NEWS:
https://www.sciencedaily.com/news/fossils_ruins/dinosaurs/

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 11/23/16

Beware the Barnacle!

Used in a sentence:  "Those of you who refuse to pay your parking tickets need to beware the barnacle, 'cause it might just be showing up on your windshield next."

Boot no more ... this super-suction cup concept that obstructs your windshield until you pay your fines, after which the cups release via a wifi signal and you have to take it back to the cops (or risk another bigger fine I assume) just wrapped up testing here in the FTL and, coincidentally, also back (near) home in Allentown PA.

Easier for everyone than those awkward clunky heavy boots, it's "the future" of rendering scofflaw vehicles inoperable.  And don't worry -- if you choose to just drive away doggie style (as in your head out the window), it's also illegal to drive with such an obstructed view, so you'd just be making a bad situation worse.

In other words ... pay your damn fines people ... or you'll be barnacled!

THE FTL TEST:
http://www.sun-sentinel.com/business/consumer/fl-barnacle-test-drive-20161014-story.html

THE ALLENTOWN TEST:
http://www.mcall.com/business/mc-barnacle-allentown-parking-authority-20161014-story.html

FROM THE MIND OF A MARINE:
https://www.facebook.com/barnacleparking/

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 11/16/16

Breaking the usual format for a post of mine on a Wednesday, tonight there is a call back to what was once upon a time my*original* intent for this type of weekly post ...

... an actual puzzle for you to solve.

In case you can't read the image, here is the item ...

"This is an unusual paragraph.  I'm curious how quickly you can find out what is so unusual about it.  It looks so plain you would think nothing was wrong with it.  In fact, nothing is wrong with it!  It is unusual though.  Study it, and think about it, but you still may not find anything odd.  But if you work at it a bit, you might find out."

No pressure ... but I found it in a list of brain teasers to keep old people sharp in a special senior citizen pullout section of the newspaper back during my trip to western PA (where lots of old people still read the newspaper -- me included).

If you're reading this on the Facebook, maybe don't spoil it for others and just click like when you've figured it out.  I'll comment there 24 hours after posting so you can check yourself.

Good luck staying sharp in *your* old age!

A FEW MORE ANTI-AGING BRAIN GAMES:
http://www.mastersofhealthcare.com/blog/2009/100-awesome-anti-aging-brain-games-online-and-off/

MORE EXERCISES FOR YOUR BRAIN:
https://www.developinghumanbrain.org/brain-exercises-prevent-alzheimers-dementia/

CONTEXT ON THE AGING BRAIN:
http://www.dana.org/Cerebrum/2015/Cognitive_Skills_and_the_Aging_Brain__What_to_Expect/

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 11/9/16

Scrotox.

Used in a sentence:  "What was once an SNL parody is now a reality and the latest trend in plastic surgery for the menfolk:  scrotox."

And yes, that's botox for your scrotum.

Lookit, I'm-a just going to go ahead and go on record now as I approach my mid-life crisis -- if you're going to love me in my advanced age, you're going to have to love me wrinkly balls and all.  Getting all needled down there just for a smoother appearance is not for me.

It's gonna be prunes and not plums ... and I'm okay with that ... and all of you who spend time with my testicles are just going to have to deal.

THE SNL SKIT:
http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/scrotox/n12837

EQUAL RIGHTS FOR DOWN THERE REJUVENATION OPTIONS:
http://www.medicaldaily.com/scrotox-botox-injection-claims-smooth-and-boost-size-wrinkly-male-private-398969

DO NOT REGRET GETTING OLDER AS IT IS A PRIVILEGE DENIED TO MANY:
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/all-grown/201502/obsessing-over-wrinkles-depressed-about-aging

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 11/2/16

No thank you for your service.

Used in a sentence:  "With Veteran's Day just around the corner, it might be as good a time as any to highlight a recent trend which is to think twice before you speak to a veteran, as chances are that they might better appreciate hearing "no thank you for your service" instead of "thank you for your service".

That latter phrase slips out almost on auto-pilot any more, and *that's* part of the problem.  It's perceived as a canned response and, in a world of "volunteer" soldiers (where "volunteer" is sometimes heavily dictated by race and/or socio-economic status), it's often viewed as a cop-out from a public who really has no idea what sacrifices veterans make, and who too quickly assumes that that little phrase is all that needs to be said to bridge the gap.

It's a tricky situation to be sure ... because each veteran's military experience was different and each veteran's sensitivity level is varied.  There may be a bit of a "damned if you do, damned if you don't" feeling after you process this information -- but here's the kicker ... maybe there are no words.  Maybe words are hollow.  Maybe actions are better -- volunteer, donate to a worthy veteran cause, or don't speak and just listen.

Because for you, veteran's day may be just one day in November when you jump on a bandwagon and spout off the obligatory phrase or post a meme or update your social media status with the thing that everybody says ... but for them, *every* day is veteran's day -- because they have that classification because they lived it.

Something to think about it going into next week ...

THE SOURCE FOR THIS PERSPECTIVE:
https://military.id.me/community-news/dont-say-thank-you-for-your-service/

AND THEY DON'T ALL HAVE PTSD EITHER:
http://www.wsj.com/articles/SB10001424052702303980004579576423045207210

THINGS YOU *CAN* DO INSTEAD:
http://www.military.com/veterans-day/8-ways-to-express-appreciation-on-veterans-day.html

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 10/26/16

Won't you be ... please won't you be ... won't you please be ... my landlord?

Used in a sentence:  "It's now official and the sign is up in the yard, so I'm now singing a new tune:  'Won't you be ... please won't you be ... won't you please be ... my landlord?'"

First -- lest you think otherwise, me and mine are NOT homeless.  Nor are we ABOUT to be homeless.  Luckily, we negotiated a two year renewal at the last signing, so we're *allegedly* assured to stay in place until Feb 2018.

Second -- that means that the house is on the market as an *investment* property.  For someone who would rather cash our rent checks than our current landlord.  For you, maybe?  I can confirm that the tenants are THE best -- especially the two puppies who call this place home!

If you want to invest, let me know.  And after I vet you ('cause, you know, I know some of you too well), I'll connect you with the realtor.

WHERE DID 'TO VET' COME FROM?:
http://www.waywordradio.org/discussion/topics/origins-of-the-verb-to-vet-1/

YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO BE MY LANDLORD:
http://www.zillow.com/homedetails/1300-NW-6th-Ave-Fort-Lauderdale-FL-33311/43101185_zpid/

TIME TO STUDY UP!:
https://www.floridabar.org/tfb/TFBConsum.nsf/0a92a6dc28e76ae58525700a005d0d53/e21a25a8c288bed98525740800537588?OpenDocument

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 10/19/16

To Lucille or not to Lucille ... that is the question.

Used in a sentence:  "It's time to make a decision about whether the baseball bat behind the coat stand should be upgraded ... a dilemma best restated as 'to Lucille or not to Lucille ... that is the question'".

Anyone from the old days might remember that bat, which I'm pretty sure was purchased at Hills way back when, and which has been the only security I had at many places I lived -- of course, in modern times, it's been supplanted by pit bulls and actual alarm systems.

It's never been used, although if you zoom in closely there is blood on the handle -- but that blood is mine, from a night twenty years ago when I got a little buzzed, listened to a little sad music, had a little breakdown and used it to smash some random things in the house next to Big Berthas on Walnut Street.  The broken glass from my evening's escapades cut my hands (hence the blood).

[As a reminder, I know better than to own a gun.  I'd use it to help "train" folks in my 'hood when they upset me ...]

Bottom line ... with all things Negan now all the rage, I'm thinking it might just be time for an upgrade to my go-to weapon of choice.

THIS LUCILLE (WARNING:  COMIC BOOK SPOILERS & ADULT LANGUAGE AHEAD):
http://uproxx.com/tv/lucille-negan-origins-the-walking-dead/

I HOPE THEY PLAY THIS WHEN NEGAN DIES:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1GVr1l7Xbko

JUST SAYIN':
http://www.dailykos.com/story/2013/7/15/1223995/-Baseball-Bats-The-Self-Defense-Weapon-of-Choice-for-Men-Comfortable-with-Their-Penis-Size

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 10/12/16

Drive-by hugging.

Used in a sentence:  "During my recent trip back home, I was *almost* the victim of a drive-by hugging."

Mind you, there are worse things of which a person could be a victim, that's for sure.  

As luck (and, to be truthful, determination) would have it, Lissa S was able to arrange things to make the drive to LVC to join up with a bunch of us during the homecoming weekend festivities after all.

However, had she not done so, she did inform me that she would execute a drive-by hugging as I drove home from central PA on to DC and other points south -- meaning that I would have had to stay in touch such that when I was in her neighborhood, I would have been able to hop out of the car and receive (and reciprocate) a hug.

Which got me thinking?  Can we somehow role that concept out as a real thing -- I mean beyond Lissa's suggestion and that little boy recently caught on camera who was an early drive-by hugging pioneer when he was sneaking into a neighbor's garage to hug a dog?  I mean, sure, it might not necessarily be the thing to start in some of the 'hoods in my old hometown of Chicago at first ... but if we choose carefully and get it figured out, then we can ramp it up to all the places it's needed most.  Although, in reality, "all the places it's needed most" equals wherever two or more humans (or a human and an animal) are gathered.

I sense a revolution in the making ...

A DRIVE BY HUGGING PIONEER:
http://anguspost.com/boy-caught-on-tape-drive-by-hugging-a-dog-and-woman-turns-to-facebook-to-help-identify-him/

DO IT FOR THE OXYTOCIN!:
http://health.usnews.com/health-news/health-wellness/articles/2016-02-03/the-health-benefits-of-hugging

THE STATES THAT NEED IT MOST -- CA, TX, FL, IL and WA:
http://www.commondreams.org/newswire/2010/07/21/national-state-state-study-drive-shootings-reveals-data-victims-time-location

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 10/5/16

#8statesin8days

Used in a sentence:  "Coming very soon to a city near you (assuming that you live on a very specific route that I'll be taking up and down the coast):  my #8statesin8days tour."

On the way north, those states will be FL, GA, SC, NC, VA, WV, MD and PA ... and on the way south, those states will be PA, MD, DC, VA, NC, SC, GA and FL -- which means I'm bending the rules and making DC a "state" for purposes of the hashtag.  It's also somewhat misleading because I'll spend the majority of the time in just *one* of those states, seeing as how I was born and raised in PA and have the most catching up to do there.

A few other numbers ... there will also be 5 visits to Kaplan centers, and 2 more stops on the Burger Quest tour ... and innumerable check ins by me along the way filling up the Facebook feeds of those connected with me on the social media.  Plus -- almost every meal has been thoughtfully planned out, 'cause that's the way I roll.

Here's to a whirlwind tour of the southeast coast and an extended stay just above the Mason-Dixon line aka #8statesin8days.

ON DC AND STATEHOOD:
http://dailysignal.com/2015/07/13/225-years-ago-today-washington-d-c-was-founded-heres-why-it-will-never-become-the-51st-state/

BURGER QUEST STOP FOR CHARLOTTE:
https://www.baddaddysburgerbar.com/

BURGER QUEST STOP FOR ORLANDO:
http://bethsburgerbar.com/

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 9/28/16

Okonomiyaki is the new Empanada.

Used in a sentence:  "You heard it here first folks -- just like I predicted back in 2012 that empanadas would be the next food craze (replacing all those extra fro-yo shops with which we were inundated) ... I am prepared to announce in 2016 that 'okonomiyaki is the new empanada'"

Of course, if you find it funny that *I* may be a future trend-spotter (what with my penchant for celebrating / memorializing / honoring / remembering / fetishisizing the past in just about every blog post), then you may have to overcome that observation to believe me.

And if you're not familiar with the modern day okonomiyaki (as expanded in Japan post Hiroshima-bombing when war widows needed an income and the proliferation of okonomiyaki stalls took place), then know that it supposedly translates to "anything you want grilled" and also know that it is basically Japanese layered pancakes.

In a modern world fond of mash-ups, it's got a crepe base, and layers like lasagna and eggs mixed in like an omelette, and now comes with a branded okonomiyaki sauce (think worcestershire) ... and did I mention that you can put whatever you want on the layers (i.e.  bacon, bacon and bacon ... with maybe pork belly too).

I'm telling you ... keep an eye out ... there will be okonomiyaki food trucks driving through your city ... and okonomiyaki counter service places popping up in your neighborhood ... and okonomiyaki stands on your street corners ... because okonomiyaki is the new empanada.

SOME OKONOMIYAKI HISTORY:
https://www.pressreader.com/usa/sun-sentinel-broward-edition/20160911/281565175214446

THE SOURCE OF TODAY'S GRAPHIC IMAGE:
http://en.japantravel.com/tokyo/jyaken-nou-okonomiyaki/15339

THE OFFICIAL OKONOMIYAKI MUSEUM:
https://www.japanhoppers.com/chugoku/hiroshima/kanko/269/

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 9/21/16

Murder's Lament.

Used in a sentence:  " I present Murder's Lament (the latest entrance in the occasional series of super-short sTROYies)"

THERE IS NOTHING so heavy as the empty pet carrier that you lug into the house when returning from the vet after the passing of a family member.

THERE IS NOTHING so soft as the old sweatshirt that was used to swaddle your loved one to hold against you while waiting for the drugs to kick in before the final procedure -- the same one used in 2010, 2012, 2013 and ... this past Tuesday.

THERE IS NOTHING so difficult as the decision to be made as to the time to take the most unselfish of actions.

THERE IS NOTHING so peaceful as knowing that the pain and the uncomfortableness are gone.

THERE IS NOTHING so tender as the look in your loved one's eyes as they seek someone familiar amidst the fog of the sedative.

THERE IS NOTHING so sweet as the sigh your loved one gives as they lay their heads against your chest to find comfort from the beating of your heart in their final moments.

THERE IS NOTHING so sad as that last breath.

THERE IS NOTHING so empty as the room you enter back at home because you hear the phantom cries of the one who once spent so much time there.

THERE IS NOTHING so full as the minds of the ones left behind with remembrances of seventeen years of cuddle sessions.

THERE IS NOTHING so rewarding as knowing that the empty pet carrier can be donated to a rescue agency that will see to it that it will be used to transport others to their forever homes.

THERE IS NOTHING so lasting as the memories.

THERE IS NOTHING so permanent as the love.

THERE IS NOTHING so heavy as the heart as it grieves.

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 9/14/16

Garbage juice.

Used in a sentence:  "Added to the list of things I learned now that I live in Florida -- all about the very controversial 'garbage juice', or leachate, as it is technically called."

It's kind of exactly what it sounds like -- although think big, as in a landfill sized garbage dump, and the fact that water percolates through waste (you know, like a giant coffee machine) and then drains out ... wherever.

Locally, one of the county landfills wants to deal with the issue of garbage juice in house -- but the fear is that if they have a garbage juice drinker of some kind, then *other* places are going to ship *their* garbage juice to us locally for disposal.  So now it's a classic NIMBY situation (not in my back yard), and NO one wants to drink the garbage juice.  (And also now I want to yell, "drink your garbage juice, Shelby"!)

ON GARBAGE JUICE:
http://ezinearticles.com/?What-is-Leachate?-And-Garbage-Juice-Explained&id=1704331

NO GARBAGE JUICE FOR YOU!:
http://www.sun-sentinel.com/local/broward/fl-garbage-juice-public-meeting-20160901-story.html

SPEAKING OF GARBAGE JUICE:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dRgIhG4t2t4

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 9/7/16

Dirty quadrant.

Used in a sentence:  "Last week on Wednesday, I talked about how my favorite new Florida weather word was 'invest' (the early name for a storm that might turn into a hurricane that needs to be 'investigated') ... but now it's already been quickly replaced by something else I saw on the news during coverage of Hermine hitting upstate Florida ... an emphasis on watching out for the dirty quadrant."

Admittedly, when I heard the phrase, I immediately thought of some of my favorite places to visit when I'm in my new go-to vacation spot in New Orleans ... but it turns out that's not what it meant at all.  Instead, it's the colloquial name for the right front quadrant of a storm -- which has higher winds, higher seas and higher storm surges.  What with hurricane season still running for almost two more months, now I know to be *especially* aware of where the dirty quadrant is going to make landfall.

HURRICANE STUFF, 'CAUSE SCIENCE YO:
http://www.hurricanescience.org/science/science/hurricanestructure/

A REFERENCE TO THE DIRTY QUADRANT:
http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2005/09/0923_050923_rita_prepare_2.html

WHY *WHERE* THE HURRICANE HITS IS ALSO IMPORTANT:
http://www.aoml.noaa.gov/hrd/tcfaq/D6.html

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 8/31/16

Invest:Florida::Derecho:Chicago.

Used in a sentence, "In case you don't know your analogy constructs, Invest:Florida::Derecho:Chicago is to be read as 'invest is to Florida as derecho is to Chicago'".

And I draw that conclusion because I had no idea what a derecho was before moving from central PA to Chicago (it's a special kind of wind storm that is like a city tornado, except it's straight-line winds) ... and I had no idea what an invest was until this past week in Florida as we all watched to see where invest 99L would go.

First, it turned out that invest 99L missed us in southern Florida completely and then hung out in the Gulf before turning into Tropical Storm Hermine, which will be headed north and threatening Tampa and most of the East Coast over the upcoming holiday weekend.  Second, it turns out that invest is short for investigation, and it is quite literally a disturbance that the Hurricane Center wants to investigate closer -- and the L stands for the Atlantic (E is used in the Pacific) -- and they only go from 90-99, and then they start over again at 90 (which seems odd, but ... whatever).

Who knew -- besides meteorologists, that is?  And now -- me!  And also now -- you!

MY (NEW) FAVORITE FLORIDA WEATHER WORD:
https://weather.com/storms/hurricane/news/what-is-an-invest-20120815

MY FAVORITE CHICAGO WEATHER WORD:
http://www.spc.noaa.gov/misc/AbtDerechos/derechofacts.htm

BEWARE THE HERMINE!:
https://weather.com/storms/hurricane/news/tropical-storm-hermine-things-to-know-florida

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 8/24/16

Sharrows.

Used in a sentence:  "We need more sharrows in this town!"

Now that I'm back to biking again (twice a week currently ... about to be four times a week soon ... with a goal of six times a week this fall), I'm much more keenly aware of the concept of sharrows.

Turns out that not all roadways have lanes big enough for a separate bike lane, so these signs painted on certain streets are the way to inform car-driving folks that, so long as that arrow is visible, the space should be *shared* between cars AND bikes.

With Florida being the absolute deadliest state in which to ride a bike ("luckily", other towns in Florida than mine are in the ten worst cities list), the more sharrows we have, the safer I'm going to feel.

MORE SHARROWS PLEASE:
http://luxurylivingfortlauderdale.com/fort-lauderdale-sharrows-bicyclists/

THE LAW OF THE SHARROW:
http://flbikelaw.org/2013/07/sharrows-and-bmufl-signs/

FLORIDA GETS TOP HONORS ... FOR DEADLIEST STATE IN WHICH TO BIKE:
http://www.attorneybrianwhite.com/cyclists-beware-10-statistically-fatal-bicycling-routes-in-the-u-s.php

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 8/17/16

75,000 and counting!

Used in a sentence:  "Earlier this week, the visitor tally at www.capcognition.blogspot.com rolled over to be 75,000 and counting!"

To anyone who has ever stopped by, THANKS!

(To anyone who sees this image and flashes back to my naked gardening day photo from this past May, SORRY!)

To anyone who thinks I should have millions of visitors by now, just know that I'm happy having a permanent place for most of my randomness should the Facebook ever close its doors!

To anyone who hasn't stopped by recently, here are just some of the changes to the blog this year:

• Thought Thursdays have been turned over to local restaurant reviews -- the 50 Tastes of Florida.
• Flashback Fridays now include, every other week, the photos I inherited from my father when he passed.
• The  L V C || C L 150 Memories bonus series is heading toward its finish this October -- so if I knew you in college and you haven't been remembered yet, your turn is coming up.
• The *last* day of every month is for a new short story concept (only updated once a month) set decades in the future:  2 0 8 4. 
• The *first* day of every month is dedicated to what will one day be my foundation (as soon as I win the lottery) called: Just One More ... with different monthly challenges to effectuate change.
• My once-short-now-long superhero origin story ('The Lorem Ipsum Archives') has been moved to its own blog (see link below) and has made it to Chapter 31 ... with many more adventures planned.

Speaking of which, a few initiatives for 2017 are also coming in the new year ... including the renewal of a second set of "50 Tastes of Florida" with new index features AND a brand new surprising short story concept weekly on what will be called TNT Tuesdays.

That's all the long way to say that there are more and more reasons to take a few moments to explore everything on the site (which is super easy to do with the list of labels on the right hand side).

So again ... many THANKS!  I'll see you on the interwebs!

THE 2 0 8 4 SERIES SO FAR (NEW THIS YEAR):
http://capcognition.blogspot.com/search/label/2%200%208%204

THE JUST ONE MORE SERIES SO FAR (NEW THIS YEAR):
http://capcognition.blogspot.com/search/label/just%20one%20more%20...

THE 50 TASTES OF FLORIDA SO FAR (NEW THIS YEAR):
http://capcognition.blogspot.com/search/label/Series%3A%20%2050%20Tastes%20of%20Florida