Bonus Post: From the Kap-files #1

From the Kap-files #1:

[ReKap:  As of today, my position was eliminated at my job, and so I'm CONCLUDING my countdown looking back through my files, mental or otherwise, representing nearly 11 years with the company ...]

#1:  And so it ends.   Contrary to what this photo might imply, my final selection in this series is NOT going to be about this branded sartorial selection ... exactly.

Instead, each is a stand in for all the people over the years who have worn similar shirts (and it's only a select special few who have that raincoat in the upper left hand corner).  Because if there's a common consistent answer whenever any employee is asked what is best about this job ... it's almost always "the people" as a response.

And that's what I'll take with me ... memories and insight and knowledge from all of the amazing, talented, focused, creative, dedicated and wonderful individuals with whom I had the pleasure to interact.  There are too many to mention by name ... but if you're one of the ex-Kaplan (or one of those still with the organization), then you know that I'm talking about YOU.  Thanks to each of YOU for the role you played in my professional development.

Now ... what's next?!?

Bonus Post: From the Kap-files #2

From the Kap-files #2:

[ReKap:  In 2 calendar days, my position is being eliminated at my job, and so I'm looking back through my files, mental or otherwise, representing nearly 11 years with the company ...]

#2:  Seems only appropriate that I save one of my "prized" work-related possessions for last.  Gifted to me by a departing employee back in the last decade, it's an autographed copy of Stanley H. Kaplan's auto-biography.  I'm not saying that it's worth tons of money on the ebay ... or that it has much value to someone not in the business or the company ... but for me, it's a bittersweet reminder that, when given to me, the comment was made that she wanted to give it to someone who would value it and who would have longevity with the organization.  Now, it will take its place in the "Kaplan" box in my archives.

Bonus Post: From the Kap-files #3

From the Kap-files #3:

[ReKap:  In 3 calendar days, my position is being eliminated at my job, and so I'm looking back through my files, mental or otherwise, representing nearly 11 years with the company ...]

#3:  You know how yesterday, when I mentioned being most fulfilled at work when my creativity was allowed to run free?  Yeah -- plus also this made me feel the same way.

*This* is the newsletter for our division that I was allowed to publish every other week (our team was kind of like 'the Cloud', where all knowledge was stored ... hence the name).  It was truly a team effort to gather all the information (and to edit it ... because, for reasons I still don't understand, the feedback each and every issue was "maybe it could be a little shorter?") ... but the final cut got to be in my voice, and so, for 47 issues between 2011 and 2012 (yep, I've turned them into a binder as a keepsake to go into the archives), the entirety of my skill set converged into accomplishing this task.  Eventually, circumstances changed, rendering the concept outdated and so I shelved it, but for those two years, I was, as they say, "in my element".

Bonus Post: From the Kap-files #4

From the Kap-files #4:

[ReKap:  In 4 calendar days, my position is being eliminated at my job, and so I'm looking back through my files, mental or otherwise, representing nearly 11 years with the company ...]

#4:  In my time with my company, I have felt the most fulfilled any opportunity whereby my creativity was allowed to run free ... and as this countdown approaches its end, I can't not mention one of those creative projects that I got to do back in the summer of 2012.  (Double negative alert ... that means I *am* about to mention it ...)

After having "hosted" Flat Stanley for the first time in Chicago during Thanksgiving of 2011 for a high school friend's child, and knowing that our founder was named Stanley Kaplan (that's his face in the photo there), it was only a matter of time before "Flat Stanley Kaplan" was borne as an idea.  Employees took photos of him all around the country before our occasionally annual Vegas meeting, and I got to create a slide show of all the images.  (Note:  I kept my *other* idea of Adult Flat Stanley images to myself, as that would be on the NSFW side of things.)  Oh and that Olympic torch ... it was the summer of 2012 after all ...

Good (and pretty recent) times!

Bonus Post: From the Kap-files #5

From the Kap-files #5:

[ReKap:  In 5 calendar days, my position is being eliminated at my job, and so I'm looking back through my files, mental or otherwise, representing nearly 11 years with the company ...]

#5:  When discussing the "revolution" of working from home yesterday, I neglected to include one *major* perk.  Because of that change in late 2010, I was introduced to Skype full on.  (We had tried it in the physical offices a little before ... but it really took off in the home office setting.  And I know that young people and Oprah had been doing it for years.)  Skype became the virtual water cooler for our team of experts spread across the country who hadn't really known each other prior to the formation of the group.

But it wasn't just the communication channel that was special ... it was about the emoticons that got to color our chat.  Great was the day that included a notification that your Skype was being updated, and many a side conversation was conducted over the possibility that the update *might* include new options.  And at least once a month, one of us needed to google "hidden Skype emoticons" to make sure we weren't missing ANY from our daily lives.  (And if I could, I'd punctuate this post with the new pooping sheep for effect.)

Bonus Post: From the Kap-files #6

From the Kap-files #6:

[ReKap:  In 6 calendar days, my position is being eliminated at my job, and so I'm looking back through my files, mental or otherwise, representing nearly 11 years with the company ...]

#6:  As we approach the end of this countdown, we also transition to how I spent these last few years with the company.  After a transformation in strategy and structure in late 2010, I joined a newly created team that was like a help desk for all internal employees with a side of special projects almost like we were consultants for our division.  And the kicker?  This team was part of the remote workforce ... and so, for the last four years, I've experienced the joy of working from home.

Mind you, there was a learning curve.  I'm pretty sure I gained fifteen pounds just from having the fridge and the pantry so close to enable a grazing habit.  It also took a few months to find the right spot to set up shop (back in Chicago, I created a "murphy office" that was nightstand after hours and the laptop area during the day -- just so I could be by a window).  But eventually I came to embrace all of the perks -- like having amazing flexibility, working from wherever I found myself in my travels, rolling out of bed a minute or two before the work day started, and not always wearing clothes.

All kidding aside ... that arrangement is what enabled me to so easily make the big move earlier this year from Chicago to Florida (after all, I could work from anywhere there was internet) ... AND it's what made adopting the two rescue puppies so easy.  I'm not sure what's ahead for me, but if it's not also "work from home", I know I have an adjustment ahead.

Bonus Post: From the Kap-files #7

From the Kap-files #7:

[ReKap:  In 7 calendar days, my position is being eliminated at my job, and so I'm looking back through my files, mental or otherwise, representing nearly 11 years with the company ...]

#7:  For those of you familiar with StrengthsFinders, consider this exhibit A in how context is one of my top 5.

For those of you unfamiliar with StrengthsFinders, consider this exhibit A in how I'm an apprentice hoarder.

Time to make a Kaplan box for my "archives" ...

Bonus Post: From the Kap-files #8

From the Kap-files #8:

[ReKap:  In 8 calendar days, my position is being eliminated at my job, and so I'm looking back through my files, mental or otherwise, representing nearly 11 years with the company ...]

#8:   In my best Count von Count imitation ... 1 ... 2 ... 3 ... 4 ... 5 ... 6 ... 7 ... 8!  Ah-ha-ha!  8 wonderful domestic work trips over the years!  8 times to travel!

I know, I know ... you're probably thinking that there should be more adventures like that over the nearly eleven years I was with the company -- but the fact is that, being based in Chicago as I was for so many of them, everyone always came to *us* when it was about gathering for meetings.  And note I clarified I'm talking about the domestic side of travel, which means the already featured two trips to either side of Mexico aren't making this list.

With 8 "subsidized vacations", as I tended to refer to them, I struggled a bit to find the right picture to accompany tonight's post ... but since I didn't take any photos that one time I went with a delegation to Detroit to help high school kids kick off their program (and came home early alone on a train for reasons I dare not yet disclose ;) ), nor of the two times in 2014 when I went to Orlando to engage in some training, it came down to a choice between the shots of NYC from the two different trips there in 2010 and 2012 (i.e.  the Freedom tower being built, the Rockefeller center Christmas tree, Times Square, summertime in Central Park) OR the many many images of Vegas from the last three summer weeks I spent there (i.e.  the strip, the Grand Canyon, the exorbitantly priced burger I sought out in the suburbs via a taxi as part of my Burger Quest series, etc, etc).

So ... what did I choose to represent those eight trips?  This sandstone fellow who greeted me in the Vegas airport each year (seemed fair, with Vegas counting for 3 of the 8, no?).  I'm going to miss ya, little buddy!

Bonus Post: From the Kap-files #9

From the Kap-files #9:

[ReKap:  In 9 calendar days, my position is being eliminated at my job, and so I'm looking back through my files, mental or otherwise, representing nearly 11 years with the company ...]

#9:  What better day than today (Christmas itself) to feature some of the wonderful gifts that I got at the annual (pre-great-recession) holiday parties for the greater Chicagoland employees.

We competitively played the "white elephant" concept, where you had a number that could get called multiple times, permitting you to steal from others or choose a new gift.  And when I say competitive, I mean competitive, as that Jelly Belly branded candy dispenser was only won by me with some reality- show-level alliance building.  The nightlight bustier and the peppermint Christmas monkey (who still makes an annual appearance at the holidays, despite the fact that he lost his peppermintiness many years ago) were acquired more directly.  [As a bonus, I found photos from that holiday party where the monkey joined my family ...]  

Or, in other words ... Happy Holidays!

Bonus Post: From the Kap-files #10

From the Kap-files #10:

[ReKap:  In 10 calendar days, my position is being eliminated at my job, and so I'm looking back through my files, mental or otherwise, representing nearly 11 years with the company ...]

#10:  All good things must come to an end.  (And no, I don't mean that I'm ending this countdown before it's time ...)  In October of 2010, many quarters into the Great Recession, the Schaumburg center (where I started my career back in 2004) was shuttered. 

BUT ... not before a bunch of us with connections to the suite of classrooms, a video lab, a goldfishbowl front office, a manager's office and a few closets that were otherwise-purposed throughout the years could come together to properly wish it a goodbye.  I was honored to offer up a eulogy ... in which I modified Edgar Allen Poe's "The Raven" to fit the situation.  As this screen shot demonstrates ... a video exists (but only on the Facebook ... and only if you know the secret handshake [i.e.  are friends with she who posted it]).

Not to brag ... but some say it was the perfect way to say goodbye.  In other words ... quoth the Canadian goose that stood in for the raven (for obvious reasons to anyone familiar with the suburb territory there):  "Schaumburg's Nevermore!".

Bonus Post: From the Kap-files #11

From the Kap-files #11:

[I'm past the halfway point of this countdown, so surely you know by now that in 11 calendar days, my position is being eliminated at my job, and so I'm looking back through my files, mental or otherwise, representing nearly 11 years with the company ...]

#11:  Tonight's post is dedicated to those whom we eventually stopped referring to as an acronym out of respect for all that they did for the students.  We also didn't necessarily have to complete these forms that I found from a group training we did ... because we hired the *best* ones who were always unbelievable employees.

I know I'm going to miss a few names from this list ... but here's to our part time team members (some of whom went on to full time roles) over eleven years (well, seven years before the center staffing model went away) who sat in that first seat seen when students (and parents ... and the occasional homeless person ... and people looking for other testing centers ... and people looking for the gym ... and the tanning lady looking for copies) and advised our students (and everyone else) in any number of ways (all of them outstandingly):  Emily A, Courtney B, Jon B, Matt B, Shomari B, Zach B, Mike C, Jack E, Jamechia H, Lauren F, Matty F, Rajesh G, Rupal G, Michael G, Mita G, Eric H, Jay K, Ruby K, Malwina K, Amy L, Adam M, Cody M, John M, Amy R, Hima R, Dana R, Deborah S, "Ethan" S, Jenny S, Magdana S, Tim S and Elena T (who is last and certainly not least and may have even been the best, were we allowed to choose favorites -- which I don't think we are).  One of those people on this list took the phrase "I'm so hard-working, I practically live in the center" to a new level and someone is not on the list because she only worked one shift and then left because she was afraid that the green light from the copier would harm her unborn babies (and she had stuff off the interwebs to back her up).

No doubt I forgot someone on this list (culled from past group emails and contact sheets I located in my files) ... but even if the name was omitted ... or misspelled ... or whatever ... the fact that they all contributed to my personal success over the years will never be forgotten!

Bonus Post: From the Kap-files #12

From the Kap-files #12:

[I'm at the halfway point of this countdown, so surely you know by now that in 12 calendar days, my position is being eliminated at my job, and so I'm looking back through my files, mental or otherwise, representing nearly 11 years with the company ...]

#12:  As the story goes, a certain employee opened up the office file cabinets to discover this note (the image is a faithful recreation, like in those awful docu-stories on the TV) ... and seeing as how his last name was the second word of that call to action, he was somewhat surprised and concerned.

Ostensibly, the note was a reminder that we were switching background check companies (coincidentally, said employee shared his name with the departing company) and so the applications bundled in the rubber band would need to first have the insert swapped out with the form from the new company ... and that the note meant nothing more.

os.ten.si.bly (adverb):  apparently or purportedly, but perhaps not actually

And, in the wise words of Forrest Gump, "that's all I have to say about that".  (I couldn't *not* say SOMEthing in this retrospective ... but I also couldn't say EVERYthing, so I'll settle for the cryptic.)

Bonus Post: From the Kap-files #13

From the Kap-files #13:

[I'm at the halfway point of this countdown, so surely you know by now that in 13 calendar days, my position is being eliminated at my job, and so I'm looking back through my files, mental or otherwise, representing nearly 11 years with the company ...]

#13:  *This* is a pre-great-recession story.

Once upon a time ... in a far-off organizational structure known as "Central" ... which encompassed many a midwestern state (and often all of Canada) ... throughout all of the land there would be an annual competition to be the best ... at ... well ... everything!  And in the calendar years 2006 and 2007, the "Central"-ians (not to be confused with those who still live in that coal town in PA that has remained on fire for decades) ... were deemed to be the best of the best.

The reward ... for two consecutive years, the "king" packed everyone up for a long four day weekend and celebrated with them in the wilds of Mexico (or, more accurately said, in a all-inclusive resort on each of the Mexican coasts ... first near Puerto Vallarta, and then near Cancun in the Maya Riviera for the second year).  I have many more pictures than the two I'm posting ... and JUST as many stories (probably more) ... but I don't have the time to get releases from everyone, so I'll only include the group shots.  (Note ... I *am* in the one above [actually, just my ear, because Shaun S is standing in front of me] but I missed the one below a year later because I was sleeping off "too much fun" from the night before and self-selected out of what I thought was an optional volleyball game.])

Sadly, our attempts at a three-peat were derailed by the arrival of the Great Recession and all that came after ... but those of us who were lucky to participate will always have Mexico!

Bonus Post: From the Kap-files #14

From the Kap-files #14:

[I'm nearing the halfway point of this countdown, so surely you know by now that in 14 calendar days, my position is being eliminated at my job, and so I'm looking back through my files, mental or otherwise, representing nearly 11 years with the company ...]

#14: From the actual desk of Troy A. Neidermyer ... my writing utensil caddy (if that's what this thing is called?) with the very same messages still affixed to it that stared at me each day I went to work.  The first item regarding the positioning of the instructor was a shout-out to my nurses-to-be.  Back in the center days, we had various customer types, and those studying for the NCLEX were the most ... let's say ... memorable.  For starters, it took WAY too long for me to figure out why every time we had a special class of over three dozen students, the majority of whom were women, we would always run out of toilet paper on the second day of four long days.  That point aside (which did mean frequent trips across the street to the Walgreen's), I recall fondly the early days of finding these students by travelling with Beth A to Rockford or DeKalb (or down the street to Palatine, with regards to my original center) and to DePaul and Loyola and the city schools in my later one ... and of the special characters I met along the way (I'm looking at you Marlene R) ... and to the students, to whom I replied when one of them complained that she didn't even know who her instructor was ... "the instructor is the person in front of the class" (forever memorialized on that label).

The other message?  Well that came from an honest-to-goodness fortune cookie from the Chinese restaurant next door (shout-out to Yen's!) and was a reminder that my professional development required me to rein in my occasional feistiness and my ... let's say ... creative ... emails for which I was once known.  (Note:  this past behavior in no way influenced my current situation, as I did, indeed, develop professionally through the years [especially after I started this blog to channel my creative energies]).

Bonus Post: From the Kap-files #15

From the Kap-files #15:

[I'm nearing the halfway point of this countdown, so surely you know by now that in 15 calendar days, my position is being eliminated at my job, and so I'm looking back through my files, mental or otherwise, representing nearly 11 years with the company ...]

#15:   It was always about the rally.  Sometimes on a small scale (we used to have regular rally meetings in our center) or for a specific product ... but, in really important times, it was a rally writ large.

And every rally needs a soundtrack ... which is what is seen here from the falls of 2005 and 2007 (not sure why we weren't musically oriented in the year in between).  If you know me, you know that I love a mixed tape almost as much as I love a countdown (well, a mixed CD, as these were created in the sweet spot between cassettes and playlists), so maybe I'll have to promote these on my random Tune for Tuesdays in a few years.  Oh -- and by the way -- as far as I know, since these are limited edition collector's items and were never for sale -- any singers or groups who are reading this and recognize their songs needn't worry about any infringements of any kind.  (And a second "by the way", there should have been an explicit lyrics warning on at least one of these CDs [courtesy of a certain Mr. Mathers {who was NOT an employee, just to be clear}].)

One last point of historical significance ... this was a true TEAM rally seeing as how each location in our geographical area submitted its own song for the collection, as clearly illustrated in the 2005 edition's liner notes, a bonus picture below.  And that folks ... is how you walk down a musical memory lane!

Bonus Post: From the Kap-files #16

From the Kap-files #16:

[If you've been following along, then you already know that in 16 calendar days, my position is being eliminated at my job, and so I'm looking back through my files, mental or otherwise, representing nearly 11 years with the company ...]

#16: How can I say this one carefully?  In a competitive marketplace, it may be that a newer employee might happen to find himself or herself, upon walking home from our location, in the direct path of a similar business' location ... and that curiosity might be such that he or she might poke his or her head in, just to get a sense as to how the course of business was flowing a few blocks away...

... and that that employee may bring back the shocking report that employees of that other location may have created a cheat sheet of photos and descriptions of the people in your own office and that it was laying out where any newer employee with a curious streak might see it.

Which ... of course ... you know ... might just be "par for the competitive course" when you work for the better of the two companies ... or which might just stick in someone's craw nearly a decade later because he was described as short and bald (I'm tall in pacific rim countries AND I *choose* to get my hair cut this short).

Maybe.  Purportedly.  Avowedly.  Professedly.  Allegedly.  

Bonus Post: From the Kap-files #17

From the Kap-files #17:

[If you've been following along, then you already know that in 17 calendar days, my position is being eliminated at my job, and so I'm looking back through my files, mental or otherwise, representing nearly 11 years with the company ...]

#17:  Class starts!

In Jeopardy style:  "What was one of my favorite things to do during the center years of my job?"

Now to the image.  First, I don't want to give away any mid-naught trade secrets, so please know that there was more to the standard class start whiteboard set-up than just what I photo-shopped in.  Second, I don't want to pretend that our whiteboards stayed white for too long (notwithstanding that special citrus-filled magical creme that could be applied to recondition the board if done properly).  Third, I don't want to misrepresent the full selection of markers in the image as if that was the norm on the first day of class (veterans packed their own markers).  Fourth, the image is clearly cropped so that you can't see the assorted handprints that would have been captured on the wall *next* to the whiteboard, left there from an excess of marker dust on the hands of those of us who wanted to appear young and hip and cool and lean against the wall while answering questions.

But if you put all of that aside, for those years where it was one of my main tasks, there was nothing better than greeting a cohort of students on the first day, introducing myself and my center, talking at length about the program on which they were about to embark (I managed to cut it back to 30 minutes ... but sometimes my class starts approached the hour mark back in the day), and then starting everyone on a standardized test (after we broke to sharpen our number two pencils, of course). 

Quite simply ... I *loved* it!

Bonus Post: From the Kap-files # 18

From the Kap-files #18:

[If you've been following along, then you already know that in 18 calendar days, my position is being eliminated at my job, and so I'm looking back through my files, mental or otherwise, representing nearly 11 years with the company ...]

#18:   I know *some* people are still talking about this next item years later.  Seeing as how our office attracted really smart people who had some "down time" on shifts, it didn't take long for someone to figure out that the scanner that was processing grids was connected to a Mac computer that could be programmed to "speak" whenever there was an error (and, with the fact that this equipment was nearing the same age as Methusaleh, there were errors often enough).

And then .. it wasn't too much longer until the Mac was saying things like "I need a hug!" and "Who hired you?" and any number of other fun phrases, catching more than one employee off guard.

Bonus Post: From the Kap-files #19

From the Kap-files #19:

[If you've been following along, then you already know that in 19 calendar days, my position is being eliminated at my job, and so I'm looking back through my files, mental or otherwise, representing nearly 11 years with the company ...]

#19: Every team needs a mascot ... and, as team leader, it fell to me to locate one.  Or, with the emoticon craze of the mid-naughts as my inspiration, to *create* one.

This little guy started showing up at the bottom of our motivational emails -- LP for Lincoln Park, and BoB for Book of Business (the metric around which we most frequently rallied).  Those of you that are "in the know" also recognize that he was fully branded with our company colors.

Oh ... just one more thing ... I can neither confirm nor deny that I used my own countenance as a model on which to base the design (the similarity between LP BoB's big ears and my own is purely a coincidence ... probably ...)

Bonus Post: From the Kap-files #20

From the Kap-files #20:

[Quick reminder about this countdown ... in 20 calendar days, my position is being eliminated at my job, and so I'm looking back through my files, mental or otherwise, representing nearly 11 years with the company ...]

#20: Ever-present on my bulletin board above my desk workspace in the center in Lincoln Park (regardless of which desk), was *this* advertisement.  It was NOT a reminder to get the rug cleaned at our location (although it did always seem like it was in need of a thorough scrubbing, particularly in front of the vending machine that would spit out the sodas at high speed, all but guaranteeing that they'd "explode" upon being opened), but instead its placement was to honor an interaction with a particular instructor.  In true "blind item" fashion, I won't say his name, but only his initials ... JS.

Those two letters, interestingly enough, became self-fulfilling as he once accosted our office staff with pay raise demands, claiming that he had been our "Jonny on the Spot" whenever he was asked to do anything (aka ... he accepted his work assignments when assigned to him).  His prickly personality reappeared in a classic exchange regarding how rude it was for us to require him to complete a training program that only worked on Internet Explorer (as opposed to Java ... or maybe Sun ... or maybe those are the same thing?).  I won't reprint all of that email (you'll have to wait for the book to come out for that), but it did include these two sentences from me to him:

"You shan't be spared from a response that comes phrased in my own style of communication.  [As we don't know each other that well, I lack the ability to temper my words to meet any preconceived expectations of our collegial discussions.]"

AND ...

"To be honest, though, I've never delved into that pit of technical jargon to really have a full and complete appreciation of the sacrifices one is forced to make by not belonging to the Microsoft Majority."

Here's to the memory of all the Jonnys on all the spots out there!