Random Soapbox for Saturday 7/31/10

I don't mean to go off on a rant here, but ...

... I'm being challenged by an unlikely source to question whether we've all just simply lost our sense of community (and, in the process, wounded our collective humanity). The person leading this charge against my established practices -- John Quinones on the "summer season" of ABC's "What Would You Do". If you haven't caught it, this hidden camera show has been airing on Tu/F with some interesting case studies (hazing, race relations, polygamy). If you can see past the ones that are a little contrived, there are quite a few tidbits to be gleaned about human behavior -- and I have to say that I'm being forced to rethink my big city strategy of "don't make eye contact".

Of course, as with everything, there does have to be a balance (I'd go broke if I gave $1 to every person I see on a weekly basis around town) -- but I have to think that we can reclaim some of what's wrong with our insulated, entitled and selfish culture if we just find some way to reinvigorate our social contract.

[Note: If, over the course of the next few weeks, I get shot down in some scam by some kids pretending to have a seizure at the end of my street, someone should please add a comment to this post warning others. And if that example sounds too specific to be random, I'm going to have to take the 5th.]

WHAT WOULD YOU DO? ACCEPTING SUBMISSIONS:
http://abcnews.go.com/WhatWouldYouDo/

BUT IF YOU CAN'T MAKE EYE CONTACT, JOIN THIS GROUP DISCUSSION:
http://www.experienceproject.com/groups/Dont-Like-To-Make-Eye-Contact/18381

LOST ISN'T THE ONLY PLACE WHERE ROUSSEAU CAN BE REFERENCED:
http://www.experienceproject.com/groups/Dont-Like-To-Make-Eye-Contact/18381

Random Flashback for Friday 7/30/10

Random Flashback for Friday --> On the rocks at Ocean City MD in 1990 -- me and my cousin at dusk looking way too serious for a shore getaway weekend (was the future weighing heavily on our minds?). In addition to capturing that moment in... time with family, my other favorite thing about this pic is my locks of flowing long hair (I do sometimes miss you, surprisingly curly hair -- and you, too, cousin). And, if you look closely, you can "fashion-date" this photo as turn of the decade 80's/90's by spying my docksiders next to me.

Random Thought for Thursday 7/29/10

Sometimes I think that I'm the inspiration for the phrase "too clever for your own good" (part 5).

Take my recent experience in my new (used) Dodge Caliber. I had bought it the new-fangled way (online, sight unseen, from a dealer in Ohio who drove it to Chicago for me), and fought back my skepticism that it was a scam at each turn along the way. I took it on the road for the first time to run errands, loading it up and taking it on the highway. Hitting 70 for the first time, the dashboard monitor suddenly flashed "9 ate", and I immediately started to panic. My first thought was that it was the moment I would learn my new car bought so modernly was a lemon (despite its sunburst orange color). Then my mind immediately went to an image of the tires flying off because I had somehow gotten it to its maximum speed. But at no time could I decipher what my car was trying to tell me. What was 9 -- a reference to a speed? A sector on the car? And what was eaten? Was a belt ready to snap? I drove with trepidation, sure only of the fact that my demise was imminent and that my only salvation was to solve the riddle being provided me.

It took me way too long to figure out that I hadn't closed the hatchback door properly, and that my car was warning me to check the "gate".

DODGE CALIBER SUPPORT GROUP?:
http://www.caliberforumz.com/showthread.php?t=8425

MORE IMPORTANT "9 ATE" WARNING LIGHTS:
http://kansascity.injuryboard.com/mass-transit-accidents/update-cn-railroad-officials-admit-warning-lights-gate-not-working-in-deadly-chicago-train-crash.aspx?googleid=280486

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 7/28/10

What's in a name game?

Used in a sentence: "Sometimes the truth is hiding in plain sight, as I've discovered by playing the what's in a name game?"

For instance, with capitalization added for emphasis, the wiki-leaker who potentially put our troops in danger is named ASSange. And the international track and field star whose gender was called into question was named SEMENya. With those truths self-evident, I'm concerned about the person they chose to replace the top guy at BP -- DUDley.

wiki-leaker julian ASSange:
http://www.npr.org/blogs/thetwo-way/2010/07/28/128822418/julian-assange

not since jamie lee curtis, has there been such a famous one like caster SEMENya:
http://www.nydailynews.com/news/world/2009/09/10/2009-09-10_caster_semenya_.html

here comes robert DUDley:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/finance/newsbysector/energy/oilandgas/7909633/Dudley-poised-to-replace-Tony-Hayward-as-BP-chief.html

Random Tune for Tuesday 7/27/10

Long before the weight-loss spokesperson days ... and years before the fainting on national TV ... but certainly after the variety show that I vaguely recall watching from Nanny's bed (that's my mom's mom), Marie Osmond expanded on her "I'm a little bit country" claims with a fledgling recording career. I guess a few #1 hits signify more than just fledgling, but the one I recall most was from her comeback in the mid-80s. Why was it so memorable? -- 'cause the step-mother (that's wife #4 of 5 for those keeping score) banned the song in the household (which translated to turning it off the radio when it came on) because my mom had recently moved to the state referenced in the title. (Like sands through the hourglass, so were the days of my life ...) The link to "Meet Me in Montana" is below.

WELL WE'RE STUCK HERE IN THESE HILLS THAT THEY CALL MOUNTAINS:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cDlgyKkoGa8

Random Memorial for Monday 7/26/10

Gone but not forgotten: putting marks on the deportment chart.

Mr. Schucker, are you still out there teaching sixth graders proverbs and how to enunciate the alphabet one letter at a time? Mrs. Jones, are you still running your tongue over your top teeth as you teach Math and Science? I'm sure, by now, you've both retired -- but can I take a moment this Monday to reminisce about your system of behavior modification that you enforced at Southeast Elementary?

Since that grade was team taught at my school, each of the above teachers kept a list of students on a closet door in the classroom. As we were caught displaying inappropriate deportment (as defined by those in authority, naturally), we were called out and told to go the relevant room and put a mark on the chart next to our name. Those of us for whom it worked felt the sting of the shame during this act of public humiliation. Those of us for whom it didn't (and I was in the first group as I didn't turn so anti-authority until much later in my youth), marked their way up the punishment continuum, which I recall ended in a paddling (since that was allowed back in my day). Looking back, there's something comforting to me now about a system that taught a clear sense of personal accountability and gave the individual the choice to determine how far one would push the envelope.

Elementary system of punishment that laid the seeds for an adult understanding of risk/reward, you are missed.

DEPORTMENT CHART PROPS FROM THE EIGHTIES:
http://eric.ed.gov/ERICWebPortal/search/detailmini.jsp?_nfpb=true&_&ERICExtSearch_SearchValue_0=EJ280874&ERICExtSearch_SearchType_0=no&accno=EJ280874

MY ELEMENTARY SCHOOL (for 5th and 6th grades) ON THE INTERWEBS:
http://www.lebanon.k12.pa.us/southeast/aboutus.php

Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 7/25/10

What Chicago is talking about this week:

The Great Flood of 2010. Mrs. O'Leary's cow wasn't the culprit -- but a series of storms this weekend led to a deluge that wreaked havoc across the area. Mind you, I have no particular frame of reference as Agnes flooded PA before I had even celebrated my first birthday. I did live in Harrisburg the year the pedestrian bridge to City Island was washed away, but the waters never reached my back yard. As it is, I only know about this flood from watching the news: major interstates were closed, 'el' lines were submerged, a nearby suburb was busy rescuing people and there was no swimming in the lake due to sewage back-up. The oddest story -- a highrise downtown was evacuated (you'd think you'd be safe high up, right?) because the Chicago River spilled into the basement, knocking out power and creating a gas leak crisis. If this year is the year I'm exposed to multiple natural disasters, I'd have to say the earthquake in Palm Springs this April was more memorable (although I certainly wish those locally affected a speedy dry-out).

REMEMBERING AGNES:
http://www.agnesinnepa.org/

THE CHICAGO WEATHER BLOG:
http://blog.chicagoweathercenter.com/

OAK PARK WINS THE TOTAL RAINFALL PISSING CONTEST:
http://www.chicagobreakingnews.com/2010/07/tops-in-rainfall-totals-oak-park.html

Random Soapbox for Saturday 7/24/10

I don't mean to go off on a rant here, but ...

... I just have to get this off my e-chest about Facebook. No, it's not about not having a dislike button (I actually fear the mean girls would abuse that), nor is it about privacy concerns (I think I have mine figured out), nor is it about the unpredictability of the import blog posts to notes feature (which seems to happen once a day except for when it's once a week or what now appears to be once a month).

My issue -- the notion that FB should send me a notice about who unfriends me. It sends me notices about everything else -- and as I occasionally notice the number on my list fluctuate, I'd like to know who's dropped me. I know it's not a popularity contest (after all, Lady Gaga and Obama seem to have that pissing contest covered), but I'd still like to know who's leaving.

And, to turn it up a notch, I think politeness dictates that one provides a reason "why" one leaves. Out of respect for the hypothetically departing friend, I'll even make it as easy as possible, providing a list of options from which you can choose (if and when you leave me). Just send me the number below in a FB e-mail as your last act of communication, and I'll (gratefully) understand [my response in brackets]:

1.) It's not you, it's me. [Classic, to the point, and sparing of feelings. After all, you would be the one making the disconnection, so this seems a fair assessment.]

2.) I am a celebrity, someone else manages my account, and it's being taken down for service. [I think my FB friendship with Joe Paterno is one of the few that fits this category.]

3.) My account has been taken over by someone who is pretending I am stuck in a hotel in London and needs you to wire money to the fake me. [On second thought, if you are in this situation, just reconnect with me after you're back in FB legitimately, as I have no spare money to wire the fake you and as I've seen the news reports about this internet scam.]

4.) You're not the Troy I thought you were. [Sorry, but I'm getting closer and closer to 40 and there have been many many chapters in my life. If you don't like me now, just know that you had a role to play in making me this way (since we are the sum total of our experiences and our connections).]

5.) You're not the Troy Neidermyer I thought you were. Forget the psycho-babble, I thought you were the Troy Neidermyer that shows up when I google that name who lives in Gilman, WI and always is complaining in the town minutes. [Yep, even with a name like mine, there's more than one of me out there.]

6.) I am no longer sleeping with you or your family members. [Pretty self-explanatory. Just know that we were only ever friends out of obligation, anyway.]

7.) I am no longer sleeping with you and your family members. [That one's too creepy. Let's hope it's never used.]

8.) My significant other discovered my account and accused me of using it to hook up with past loves and shut me down. [Good luck with that one!]

9.) I don't understand you. Most normal people use status updates and the like to share personal details about themselves. Why are yours hidden in cryptic random comments that are ever-changing? [If it's too easy, then it's not worth having. Unless it's me in the bar at closing time, then I take that back.]

10.) No, really, I don't understand you. You're like Dennis Miller trying to sit in the Monday Night Football booth. That is, if you weren't too clever for your own good. Your ability to combine obscure references into thematic posts might humor you, but it just confuses the hell out of me. [My providing this option should be chalked up to an odd mix of self-awareness and insecurity.]

11.) Your continuous blog references make me feel spammed. And while we're at it, must you list the url address with every post? It makes me feel dirty -- even if you've never monetized your creative output. [Somebody's going to stumble on this and give me a book deal, so let me do my thing!]

12.) I'm over it. Facebook used to be for special people. I'm leaving because now it's too plebeian. I'm on to the next new thing on the internet. [I'm always years behind the curve -- evidenced by my late arrival to FB and the concept of blogging. I'll see you in whatever medium you're off to a few years after it's peaked!]

GILMAN TOWN MINUTES (TROY NEIDERMYER HASN'T COMPLETED MOUND SEWER):
http://www.co.pierce.wi.us/Municipal%20Government/Gilman_Folder/2008%20Minutes.pdf

GILMAN TOWN MINUTES (TROY NEIDERMYER WANTS TREES CUT ON 410th STREET):
http://www.co.pierce.wi.us/Municipal%20Government/Gilman_Folder/2008%20Minutes.pdf

SEE ITEM #11:
http://capcognition.blogspot.com/

HELP ME, I'M STUCK IN LONDON:
http://techcrunch.com/2009/01/20/latest-facebook-scam-phishers-hit-up-friends-for-cash/

Random Flashback for Friday 7/23/10

In honor of the return of Jersey Shore to MTV this upcoming week, here's a twenty year old shot of my summer trip to Ocean City (although, it was probably MD and not NJ). I can guarantee you that I did not have a GTL routine that honored my heritage. After all, what would speak to the Prussian/Native American/English in my background? Is there a beach activity that combines world domination, a communion with nature and a dry British humor? Maybe I could take over other peoples' sand castles, call on the water spirits to destroy them and then attempt to turn it into a Monty Python skit? And, while I'm on a tangent, who's going to be the first to do a mash-up of True Blood and Jersey Shore. Can't you see vampire Bill bellowing for Snooki? Or the new werewolf pack being led by the Situation? Surely HBO would come up with a scene or two featuring J-Wow's bosoms ... but I digress. I'll blame it on Lost, but somehow my flashback became a flashforward of sorts. I'll go to bed before I flash sideways ...

Random Thought for Thursday 7/22/10

Sometimes I think that I'm the inspiration for the phrase "too clever for your own good" (part 4).

Take my insistence on wearing a green long-underwear shirt to Six Flags one warm summer day in my youth in the nineties. My friends told me I would be too warm (the whole group went on this trip -- we were too disorganized to be a gang, too white to be a posse, and too worried about word association to be a clan -- of course, that would have been with a 'C' and not a 'K'). But I insisted that there was always a cool breeze off the ocean, and since we were off to Six Flags NJ, I'd be just fine as I was (thank you very much).

As soon as we hit the noon hour, I was drenched in sweat and was forced to buy clothes at the Six Flags gift shop so that I didn't die of heat stroke. In addition to having to deal with the fact that the green dyes of the long john shirt had now seeped into the pores of my arms, turning them some odd sickly color, I also had to wear the wife-beater I had just purchased with the amusement park logo of that season on it. My friends, only too happy to put me in my place for having to have listened to my stubbornness earlier in the day, would perform a call and response routine for the rest of the day. One would yell "WANT MORE" (on the front of my new purchase) ... and another would holler out what was on the back -- "NEED MORE". Much to my "delight", that exchange will still happen at random times to this very day (some twenty years later).

SEABREEZE IS MORE THAN AN ASTRINGENT:
http://www.srh.noaa.gov/jetstream/ocean/seabreezes.htm

ALTHOUGH THIS SAYS IT IS DISCONTINUED!:
http://www.medshopexpress.com/039541.html

WANT MORE SIX FLAGS HISTORY? NEED MORE SIX FLAGS INFO?:
http://investors.sixflags.com/phoenix.zhtml?c=61629&p=irol-homeprofile

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 7/21/10

Rollercoaster Round-Robin.

Used in a amusement park theme week sentence: "I don't pay dues to the club, I'm not a card carrying member, I don't have any favorites as one of my tattoos and I've never bought a picture of me with my hands in the air going past the flash on one of them (has anyone ever seen anyone do anything other than just look at how goofy they are with those shots?) -- but as I age, I do think the best thing about places like Hersheypark and Cedar Point is to simply ignore all others and employ the strategy of doing a rollercoaster round-robin."

So at Hershey -- that means the circuit of Comet-Looper-GreatBear-Sidewinder-StormRunner-Wildcat. (And, since I haven't been there in a few years, apparently I'm missing Fahrenheit!?) And, at Cedar Point, it has to be a multi-day trip to go round to Corkscrew-IronDragon-Magnum-Mantis-Maverick-Magnum-MillenniumForce-Raptor-Magnum-TopThrill-WickedTwister-Magnum (can you tell which one is my favorite there?).

[Warning -- The following people should not do a rollercoaster round-robin: those who are pregnant, those with heart conditions, those with serious back problems, those subject to motion sickness, those with other health problems that may make them more vulnerable to injury and those under the influence of alcohol or drugs. Also, loose articles are not permitted. Cameras, keys, loose shoes, purses, etc. should be held by a non-rider. And ... you must be this tall to ride a rollerscoaster round-robin.]

HERSHEYPARK COASTERS:
http://www.hersheypark.com/rides/results.php?rh=99&pa=99&rt=1

AMERICA's ROLLER COAST:
http://www.cedarpoint.com/public/park/rides/coasters/index.cfm

MAYBE PREGGERS CAN RIDE AFTER ALL:
http://www.helium.com/items/1101482-is-safe-to-ride-rollercoasters-while-pregnant

Random Tune for Tuesday 7/20/10

So I wanted to find Hersheypark Happy ( ... Hersheypark glad ... so many things to see and do ... good times to be had) but alas, I was stymied by you-tube (I think it was the first time I couldn't find what I was looking for -- although I could find that song by U2 or Cher if I wanted to). That would have let me spread the love around multiple amusement parks during this theme week -- but instead I'll have to go back to the Six Flags well and post this clip of the "we like to party" tune that they've used the last few years (this one with shots of various roller coasters from across the country).

OLD MEN LIKE TO DANCE TO THIS, IF SIX FLAGS IS TO BE BELIEVED!:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zCOdPJgeTrw

Random Memorial for Monday 7/19/10

Gone but not forgotten: regular trips to Knoebels from my youth.

My first glimpses of freedom -- when the family unit (this was biological father and wife number four with the his, hers and ours kiddie grouping) would get to Knoebels Grove multiple times each summer for picnics, reunions and the like -- and when we were able to go off on our own and enjoy the family-style amusement park (theme week!) on our own accord.

Top 10 memories:

1) learning new pop songs in the Cosmotron (with the air blower working halfway through)
2) finally being old enough to lean off the outside horse to try to catch the gold ring
3) finally being old enough to ride the Satellite (salt and pepper shakers)
4) going on handstamp night and riding the Phoenix over and over again with little waiting
5) riding the sky slide when I was little and holding on (burning the webbing by my thumb)
6) eating in the little space at the top of the circular stairs of the Wharf
7) being scared by the story of the girl who died from turning her flyer car too hard (and you can still see the ribbon in the tree)
8) swimming in the pool one of the few times we did both park and pool
9) riding the train out into the woods to see the squirrels eating the corn cobs
10) jumping out of my seat every single time in the haunted house running into the engine at the very end

My trips to Elysburg to run around "America's largest free admission park", you are missed.

THAT's THEIR TAG LINE:
http://www.knoebels.com/index.asp

A COMIC VERSION OF YOURS, MINE AND OURS (THE ORIGINAL WITH LUCILLE BALL):
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0063829/

IF WIKIPEDIA IS TO BE BELIEVED, IT WAS ONCE PEGGY's PARK:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Knoebels

Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 7/18/10

What Chicago is talking about this (Amusement Park theme) week:

Let me just say --sometimes this thing just writes itself. Heavily featured in the news this week -- an incident at Six Flags in nearby Gurnee where Porky Pig was attacked and beaten about the Pig Ears 10 to 15 times. The culprits -- employees of the theme park who were there on their day off. The most surprising part of the news (not the jokes about tenderizing the pork that I won't restate here ... not the sign-off used by many news people reporting the story: th-th-th-th-that's all folks ) -- but the fact that mascot attacks happen once or twice a year. And I know I railed against gang violence at theme parks in my soapbox, but I have to admit I might find it hard to resist a chuckle at the cartoonish aspect of it all. And I would even consider it performance art if, instead of the beatdown, they simply would have smashed a giant drum over his(her) head a la the ending of the cartoons from my childhood. Or, alternatively, I might have snapped and intervened, screaming "Bacon is not to be abused!" as I joined the melee.

PORKY PIG ATTACKED BY CO-WORKERS:
http://www.thrillnetwork.com/news/3941/porky-pig-attacked-at-great-america.html

MASCOT-ON-MASCOT VIOLENCE - FUNNY OR NOT?:
http://weirdnews.about.com/od/othersports/a/MascotOnMascot.htm

TH-TH-TH-TH-THAT's ALL FOLKS IMAGE:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Thats_all_folks_cl%C3%A0ssic_-Daffy_Comando_1943_-_amb_porky_(2).png

Random Soapbox for Saturday 7/17/10

I don't mean to go off on a rant here, but ...

[And, before I do, theme week alert! For the next few days, Amusement Parks will feature into my posts.]

... with the origin of the word "amusement" springing from the need for any diversion designed to distract medieval folks from warfare, it seems like visiting a theme park nowadays and risking being caught in gang battles seems to eviscerate the true intent of that qualifier. Such parks are the backdrops for key chapters in my life: my older sisters using a day at DorneyPark as a way to try to get our parents back together shortly after their separation (sounds like a Disney/Nick movie idea, no?), frequent visits to Knoebels to escape my youth (more about that on Monday), the tried and true adolescent rites of passage at the ever expanding and mostly sweet smelling Hersheypark (that SuperDooperLooper lagoon being the main exception), and several destination vacations with various groups of friends over the years to Six Flags, Cedar Point and Walt Disney World.

To think that those long waits in line (a problem in its own right, solved creatively with the caste system recently launched at many locations -- let the rich folk pay more to jump in front of the poor masses) become a breeding ground for rival gang factions to flash signs, hoot and holler and break out in violence destroys the chance for others to truly enjoy the experience is disheartening. (I can recall one visit one summer when I learned sign language from the group behind us in line -- a project that I would not dare undertake today for fear I flash a signal unintentionally.)

Courtesy of the internet, follow the links below for stories that are disturbing in how opposite of amusing they are -- and then, let's take back our public social areas! Let's return to the days when cries were from kids who weren't tall enough to ride a certain ride and screams were from children with rot gut from eating too many sweets -- not the sounds of the wounded young-uns proving their affiliation and earning their teardrop tattoos!

THIS IS NOT A NEW PROBLEM (1985):
http://articles.latimes.com/1985-06-22/local/me-2100_1_flags-magic-mountain

ALTHOUGH CALIFORNIA SURE DOES COME UP A LOT:
http://www.knowgangs.com/gangs_news/

AS DOES SIX FLAGS:
http://shoryuken.com/f3/six-flags-selling-its-theme-parks-sad-day-115886/

POLICE BLOG THAT COMPARES PARKS TO FEASTING AT WATERING HOLE:
http://www.policemag.com/Blog/Gangs/Print/Story/2010/03/Gangs-at-the-Amusement-Park-Turning-Fun-Zones-into-Shooting-Galleries.aspx

Random Flashback for Friday 7/16/10

Random Flashback for Friday --> One last pic from Hebron United Methodist Vacation Bible School days ... religious limbo. And that's neither commentary on the apathetic generation's approach to institutionalized worship NOR is it a summary of the sideways season from Lost -- it's just what we did for VBS recess that year (and look, ma -- I got a full head of hair)! [Temple wifebeater courtesy of my sister Sherry, eighties parachute style pants with lots of zippers courtesy of my BMX friends' sartorial influence.]

Random Thought for Thursday 7/15/10

Sometimes I think that I'm the inspiration for the phrase "too clever for your own good" (part 3).

Take my attempts to put together a build-your-own-furniture desk for my home office using the alan wrench that was supplied in the box I brought home from Hills many many years ago. My friends walked in on me when I was almost done, and immediately commented on my bright pink, almost bloody fingertips. Turns out that I never thought to rotate the wrench so that I could apply pressure and turn the long end as I tightened the assorted pieces. I was painfully turning the short end over and over again until I completed the task. After all, if I made it longer it would be more like a screwdriver! [I probably put the square pegs in the round holes in my middle school ASVAB test, too.] Not many gatherings with my friends back home will go by without the telling of this story to put me in my place!

IF ONLY THE INTERNET WAS AROUND BACK IN THE DAY:
http://www.popularmechanics.com/home/reviews/hand-tools/4313471

EVEN THE ASVAB IS ONLINE (NO MORE PEGS IN HOLES?):
http://www.military.com/ASVAB

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 7/14/10

Mammalian Lacteal Secretions.

Used in a choice of sentences, "Got Mammalian Lacteal Secretions?" OR "Mammalian Lacteal Secretions - it does a body good!".

Wordplay in the truest sense. Have you heard the pressure that the milk lobbyists (yep, thanks to our functioning democracy, you can buy a lobbyist for anything) are placing on the FDA to define the word MILK and to block those who drain goats by way of their teats or those who process peanuts into a liquid or those who squeeze hemp really hard from using that word on their products? And what societal ill are these milk folks trying to fix? "The proliferation of bastardized dairy terms". I would posit that the word milk should be in the public domain, and that no one is going to confuse goats or peanuts or hemp for dairy products. But just in case, bring on the MLSshakes and butterMLS biscuits and eight maids a MLSing!

HERE's THE STORY:
http://www.usatoday.com/news/health/2010-04-29-1Amilkwars29_ST_N.htm

HERE's THE WORD GAME WORD FINDER OF WORDS THAT CONTAIN MILK:
http://www.morewords.com/contains/milk/

DO the HAPPY COWS HAVE AN OPINION?:
http://www.realcaliforniamilk.com/happycows

Random Tune for Tuesday 7/13/10

Beginning to the strains of "Pure Imagination" (heard frequently in a commercial of late), in a boat powered by the Oompa Loompa slaves, sung-song (is that the right tense) by Gene Wilder in one of his seminal roles (by that word's definition, can you actually have more than one?), educational to children everywhere who should know how a chicken is decapitated, useful as a "this is your brain on drugs" message long before the eggs in the frying pan classic ... click through for the link to "there's no earthly way of knowing ... which direction we are going ..." -- just for the randomness of it all!

I'VE GOT A GOLDEN TICKET!:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8X48RiKQmFQ&feature=related

Random Memorial for Monday 7/12/10

Gone but not forgotten: pill-pushing visitors to help us brush our teeth better.

I gotta say I've been pretty lucky with my oral hygiene, possibly because I had a sister who went into the dental field and provided me with a lifetime supply of floss (I'm using one from Hills right now, years and years later because not only does it prevent tooth decay -- it doesn't decay itself!). I can't say how much of my mouth is some kind of laser-hardened amalgamated space shuttle substance (what do kids nowadays use as a technological reference point the way my generation had NASA's reusable space plane?), but other than a slightly chipped tooth up front, my smile still works well. My favorite tooth related memory (admit it, you have one too ...) is from when the people would come visit us in elementary school and we'd all be lined up in tables, brushing our teeth before chewing up the little red pill that would turn our smiles pink based on how badly we actually were at cleaning our mouths. I'm not connected to that age youth any more, but I would guess those little red pills had some kind of dye that causes cancer and that program has probably been abandoned.

Little reddish pink oral hygiene "gotcha" pills, you are missed!

DOES DENTAL FLOSS EXPIRE?:
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20080521164048AA32uKb

WHAT IF THOSE RED PILLS WERE FROM ALICE IN WONDERLAND OR THE MATRIX?:
http://www.whostolethetarts.com/archives/000372.html

Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 7/11/10

What Chicago is talking about this week:

Shut it down! And that's not a reference to the current season of Hell's Kitchen and Gordon Ramsey's frequent dining service halting bellow, but to both the closing of downtown streets to allow for filming of Transformers 3 (where Megan Fox has been transformed to a completely different actress) and to the closing of several beaches due to high e coli readings. It's easy to skip the Loop area on the weekend (after all, I think Shia was much more watchable working the Jew-fro in Holes) ... but I was all set to get to the beach this week as the heat and humidity took its toll. As much as I love Chicago's proximity to the water, I just don't get into swimming in fecal matter (not that there's anything wrong with that if it's your scene ...)!

MICHAEL BAY IS BLOWING UP THE MAG MILE JULY 15-19!:
http://www.superherohype.com/news/articles/102466-transformers-3-filming-this-week-in-chicago

SWIM BAN BLAMED ON SEAGULL DROPPINGS?:
http://www.wgntv.com/news/wgntv-chicago-beach-swim-ban-july11,0,3493187.story

HELL's KITCHEN SEASON (CAN YOU NAME MORE THAN 3 WINNERS?):
http://www.fox.com/hellskitchen/

Random Soapbox for Saturday 7/10/10

I don't mean to go off on a rant here, but ...

... why is it that the place you go when you are most unwell is the place where you are highly likely to pick up some extra infections along the way? Chicago's various medical centers have garnered national recognition of late for their high rates of infections -- and a quick read would seem to imply that it's about a zero tolerance regarding non-adherence to rigorous policies and about changing the culture of politics in the business to allow nurses to be empowered to speak up.

And, look, I want to be a realist. I recognize we've come far from the days of blood-letting and hacksaw amputating and whiskey-as-medicine ingesting (did I mention I recently caught up on HBO's John Adams?). And I certainly don't want hospitals to slide further down the continuum between "Hippocratic healers" and "lawsuit factories" (much like newspapers slipped past the point of no return between "journalism" and "advertising" in my lifetime), but I do want there to be the highest standards of accountability with the professionals involved during a hospital visit to know that every best effort was made to avoid killing me while they were busy healing me.

I grew up in a one-hospital town (unless you were really bad, and then you were moved up to the Hershey med center) and I'm pretty sure if I end up in a hospital in Chicago it's going to be wherever my doctor's insurance rules and regulations tell him to send me -- but to the extent that I can forum shop, let it be known I want to go somewhere where I'll have a fighting chance!

2010 HOSPITAL INFECTION RATE TRIBUNE ARTICLE:
http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/watchdog/chi-100516hospital-infections,0,1569833.story

AND WHAT SOME PLACES ARE DOING ABOUT IT:
http://blogs.hcpro.com/osha/2010/05/nine-hospitals-share-their-approach-to-infection-prevention-improvement/?utm_source=icwm&utm_medium=eNL&utm_campaign=20100519

Random Flashback for Friday 7/9/10

Here's another shot from Hebron church in the summer of 1990 -- this time, religious beach volleyball. I'm not sure what makes it religious other than it was in the basement of the church (and maybe because we batted around the whale that swallowed Jonah plus a beach ball)? It's not the strangest picture of beach volleyball I've ever seen, though, as the local paper had shots of a recent charity drag queen vball competition -- notably not in a church basement but on the beaches of Chicago's Lake Michigan (and, at that party, Jonah being swallowed by a whale took on a whole different meaning)!

Random Thought for Thursday 7/8/10

Sometimes I think that I'm the inspiration for the phrase "too clever for your own good" (part 2).

Take my middle school spelling bee experience. All things said, I do pretty OK around the English language when it comes to vocab (maybe not so much on grammar or Strunk and White's style points), and I can wake up and spell supercalifragilisticexpialidocious or antidisestablishmentarianism first thing in the morning. But I was knocked out in the first round of the spelling bee in 7th grade on the word "vault" [what? vault. one more time? vault. that's not a word! vault. I don't know -- v-a-l-t?] and in 8th grade on the word "piano" [easy one - p-a-i-n-o (proving that haste makes Scrippsian waste)]. Always a good memory when a little humility is what the doctor ordered!

OFFICIAL WEBSITE OF THE SCRIPPS BEE:
http://www.spellingbee.com/

VAULT REALLY IS A WORD!:
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/vault?&qsrc=

STRUNK AND WHITE ONLINE:
http://www.bartleby.com/141/

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 7/7/10

Double Dose of Fealty.

Used in a sentence, "Between Bill Compton relinquishing his to his Louisiana Queen and John Adams working the room at the Constitutional Convention to secure baby America's to the Republic, HBO has me processing a double dose of fealty this past week."

I've gushed about True Blood before in my posts, and I have every faith that all the disparate story threads and recent reliance on frequent flashbacks are working their way toward an unbelievable culmination (Sookie's microwave hands powers are rumored to be explained this year), but the political aspects of this season (i.e. fealty) has me guessing as to where they are headed (and I've never had a class in vampiric history, so I hope they fill me in along the way).

I stumbled on the John Adams marathon on HBO for the holiday weekend, and after having dismissed it when it first aired (I don't think I'm overly fond of period pieces), I've made it a third of the way through and am quite entertained. In a clear sign that I'm truly an unusual person, I actually got some goose bumps in the scene where Ben introduced George to John in the Philadelphia courtyard (and that's Franklin, Washington and Adams respectively not a Beatles reference). I gotta say I'm even more pleased that Bosom Buddies was such a success to allow Tom Hanks to expound on the Founding Fathers and the freedoms and fealty to the republic that they espoused.

[Between yesterday and today, I may as well get premium cable channels to sponsor part of this blog if I ever choose to monetize this experience.]

BETCHA A REN FAIRE FANATIC WROTE THIS:
http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:HBkgxErb95oJ:www.sca.org.au/ynys_fawr/as_articles/as_database/as_doc_23.DOC+fealty+as+a+concept&cd=2&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=us

FAN OBSESSION TRANSLATED TO THE WEB (A FANg SITE):
http://www.trueblood-news.com/first-promo-photo-from-season-3-eric-and-sookie

THE OFFICIAL HBO WEBSITE FOR JOHN ADAMS, the miniseries:
http://www.hbo.com/john-adams/index.html

Random Tune for Tuesday 7/6/10

I used the holiday to catch up on the second season of United States of Tara on Showtime, the opening sequence for which is provided in the link below. If you're missing this companion piece to Nurse Jackie on the channel that's all but usurped the buzz once reserved just for HBO, you're missing ... the genius wordsmithing of Diablo Cody, the natural acting workshop presented weekly by John Corbett, the on-spot take on modern high school kids (for better or worse), the touch of absurdity that brings viewers back for the next episode, the bravura performance already recognized with an Emmy for Toni Collette and the all-too-close-to-home reality of loving someone with DID resonating for any who've had such an experience in their past. So, stop missing all of that and get caught up before Season 3 launches next March!

TARA OPENING SEQUENCE:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1zlBBkKyM_g

Random Memorial for Monday 7/5/10

Gone but not forgotten: Hills sponsored fireworks.

What will all the fireworks talk of late, I was reminded repeatedly of those that I saw when I was growing up -- sponsored by Hills Department Store (where I once worked), and clearly visible from the house in which I spent most of my youth.

Back in the day, Coleman's would go first right at dusk (and barely visible from my back alley looking west to that edge of town), followed by Hills (as if someone could defeat the traffic gridlock and get from one to the other -- although now that I'm older, it was probably so that the volunteer fire crews could feasibly cover two "accidents"). And, the grassy hill between the store and the jail and the old folks home would be covered with Lebanon-ites gazing skyward. Eventually, Hills would go through tough financial times, and this display went away a few years before the store itself would.

[And to those back home who were injured in the Palmyra accident last night, my thoughts are with you during your recovery.]

Displays of pyrotechnics that caused my old Dutchified neighbor Mr. Miley to exclaim " ooooh .. dat vas a purdy von ..." over and over again, you are missed.

PALMYRA ACCIDENT CAUGHT ON VIDEO:
http://www.wgal.com/news/24144519/detail.html

SIGN A HILLS DEPARTMENT STORE GUEST BOOK:
http://gb.hillsstores.com/guestbook/

OR VISIT WITH HILLS ON FACEBOOK:
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Hills-Department-Store/92491012242?filter=2

Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 7/4/10

What Chicago is talking about this week:

Change is inevitable, even with holiday traditions. This 4th of July, the city moved its regular July 3rd fireworks show (which it had been doing for 35 years) to three separate simultaneous displays over the lake in the north, central and south parts of the city. The thought -- save money by making three smaller ones instead of one big one -- plus cut back on violence and traffic headaches, particularly as influenced by the Taste. But with the demographics of the city, the effect was practically segregated shows. Thomas Daley Jefferson: "We hold these truths to be self-evident: all fireworks shows are created equal (but all viewing parties may not be)."

CHICAGO AS MOST RACIALLY DIVIDED CITY:
http://blogs.bet.com/news/newsyoushouldknow/tag/racially-divided/

SOUTH SIDE POST FIREWORKS VIOLENCE -- JUST ANOTHER CRIME FILLED NIGHT:
http://cbs2chicago.com/local/violence.south.side.2.1788557.html

Random Soapbox for Saturday 7/3/10

I don't mean to go off on a rant here, but ...

... whatever happened to old fashioned fist fights as a way for kids to settle their disputes?

This past week, family came in to town to visit and made it to the Taste for lunch -- getting out before the violence started later that night. As these stories now seem to all start: a group of kids ran into a different group of kids, and one of them was a backstabber -- of the literal kind, as the accosted youth lie in the crowded streets with a knife in his back -- when the two groups of teens just couldn't get along.

So whatever happened to the art of fisticuffs (as opposed to this knife-ticuffs or gun-ticuffs)? Admittedly, my experiences being bullied in any way were from grade school when it was harmlessly hurtful and I certainly never had to come home from school to put a frozen steak on my eye (even that image seems all black and white television-y). The closest thing I had to an injury was that one time in Mr. Schweingruber's seventh grade science class when I was kicked in the testicles by the girl in our grade with anger issues who was lashing out at men in general (and why does that memory stay with me years later?).

Even as I aged and got a bit more of a mouth on me, I still usually just confused any aggressors -- plus I did wear the kind of spectacles that would cause any potential pugilist to think twice before striking for fear that all of the breaking glass might slice a tendon or two in his fist. I can still recall DJ (he was like a brother to me), shaking his head and saying how much I needed to be beaten, but still allowing me to say things to him that no one else could get away with. (Could it be that even when I'm angry and hateful, I'm adorable?)

And, as always, I'm advocating for moderation and balance. I'm not saying that all youth should explore, embrace and embellish their ultimate fighter instincts ... but I would rather have a rite of passage be the occasional beat down instead of the shopping trip to replace your funeral suit from having worn it out prior to graduation!

YOUTH STABBED AFTER LEAVING TASTE:
http://www.cltv.com/news/wgntv-taste-stabbing-july1,0,48557.story

THE RULES OF FIGHTCLUB:
http://www.angelfire.com/ny2/russkafin/fcrules.html

NEVER BRING A KNIFE TO A FISTFIGHT:
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/NeverBringAKnifeToAFistFight

Random Flashback for Friday 7/2/10

I wish I could say I knew exactly what this was. I know that a Hebron church activity was involved but this one sure does highlight the fuzziness of a 20 year old memory. At first, I would think of Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat -- but since it's more like Troy in a Burlap Sack with a two toned Super-hero Cape-ish Blanket and a Bedouin Headdress (with another cameo of family cat Tuppy), I'm going to have to conclude that the Joseph look was not the look I was going for. Instead, it might have been some acting-out of Little Pilgrim's Progress that summer at church camp. Maybe? It certainly was not for an evening out (mostly because I wasn't old enough to drink and had barely discovered the wild side of me). And -- where the hell (or heck, since this is a church related post) did I get a burlap sack anyway?

Random Thought for Thursday 7/1/10

[I'm going to celebrate July with a new series for the next five Thursdays!]

Sometimes I think that I'm the inspiration for the phrase "too clever for your own good".

Take my first days of driving in the early nineties. For quite some time I stopped at the gas stations to fill up my tank in my first car and was convinced that my choices of petrol (87, 89, 91) were the years they were processed (you know, just like wine). Feeding this fallacy in my head was that, the older the gasoline, the cheaper it was because it had started to "spoil". But then, as I aged, they never seemed to offer the "latest vintage", and eventually someone educated me on that the 87, 89 and 91 were octanes and not markings of the year of production.

SEARCHING IN URBAN DICTIONARY FOR THIS PHRASE LEADS TO THIS!:
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=too+clever+for+your+own+good

PEOPLE COMPLAIN ABOUT ANYTHING ONLINE:
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20100525081058AAHY8eH