December 31, 2011

Random Soapbox for Saturday 12/31/11

I don't mean to go off on a rave here, but ...

[yes, another rave ... these holidays are killing my crotchety street cred] ...

... in the spirit of tonight's transition from 2011 to 2012 and in honor of what I posted last New Year's holiday (my favorite of the year) ... here are my 12 raves for 2012 (in alphabetical order) ...

1.) AIR FORCE -- with one nephew graduating from the academy in a year or so and another finishing his training for deployment in Q1 or Q2, I now have allegiance to a very specific branch of our military (and I'm all for flying more drones, if that keeps the boys out of harm's way, or we can just wrap up our warmongering for that matter). But more than anything, I'm just proud of the men that Teddy K and JAC K have become and the service that they provide to our great country.

2.) (C) -- another year, another strange way that 365 days feel so long and so short at the same time. Your stent-ed life is doin' you well! Here's to many more (years, not stents -- maybe it's time to stop smoking again?)

3.) DOT MARIE JONES -- whether on the show, or as a guest judge on a reality competition or two, or in interviews -- she just makes me smile when I see her. It's simple -- be yourself, love yourself. God bless ya!

4.) DREAM-LIFE -- thans goodness there's a place for my craziness to run wild and unhindered ... I don't remember all of them -- and not all of them are happy go lucky dreams -- but a romp through my REM state is like no other. I never know whom I'm going to see (pets that have passed on are regular characters -- and a person or two on the other side as well or where it's going to be (I swear my subconscious has created sets that get pulled out repeatedly for different dreams just like a sop opera) -- but I always know it's going to be an adventure.

5.) FLASHBACK FRIDAYS -- I've been doing this micro-blogging for nearly 1000 days, and it's taken on different flavors over the last 2.5 years (and "micro" is apparently a relative conept) -- but I do think my favorite is the pictorial autobiography one year at a time from twenty years ago that is the post I look forward to the most each week. Reliving my formative years, revisiting places I've been and people I've met -- it's a pleasure.

6.) GOLDEN TEE -- I may be getting older, but I can still crawl a good bar scene -- so long as I start my evening with the traditional games of Golden Tee. And the 2012 edition had the good sense to celebrate its popularity by uploading over two dozen older courses, making the beginning of each night out feel unique.

7.) MARTINA MCBRIDE -- In 2011, Martina released her 11th album entitled "Eleven". And sure enough, it stands up to repeat play over and over again -- each time, providing the ability to find new gems amidst the collection. Everybody knows (should be read with a tinge of Phaedra) that the girl can "sang" ... but it's the stories she tells and the stands she takes with her music that make it all the more endearing.

8.) MAULER -- I found her in the Gretna woods, abandoned by her mother, crying out for attention. She was the tiniest of kittens, and she slept inside my shirt for the first three days I had her. That was some 17 years ago -- and she's slowly and stubbornly fading away. I don't know how much longer she'll be in this world, but she still runs the house, alternatively doling out her love whenever anyone takes a nap and her chastisement when the food doesn't appear quickly enough. She's a cat like no other ... and each day is one more day with her to be treasured.

9.) QUALITY TV -- I'm an addict. I'm not in denial. I'm aware of how it influences my daily existence. But it pays off -- the rush of seeing Officer Oullette and Shane interact in the final episodes of Weeds Season 7, the thrill of the twistedness of Tate on AHS, the actorly skills of Tara or Nurse Jackie, the genius of the stories spun out of Bon Temp, the realness of how to survive a zombie apocalypse as demonstrated by Shane and Rick. My cable company could raise the price threefold, and this junkie would sell his possessions to keep the quality television crack in his life.

10.) REPUBLICAN CANDIDATES -- Probably for the wrong reason, but this batch of individuals are at least making it entertaining. The dance of our political season is to strike the "right" balance (pun fully intended) of appeasing the extremists during the primary but moderating for the masses during the main election. I can appreciate the people as people -- and there's one I'd love to have at every dinner party, or one I'd love to have as a professor , or one I'd love to see banished to work in the historical reenactments at Williamsburg because his whole worldview seems to be of the 1700's -- but I predict that the party won't have the skill to rally around one candidate and that there will be splintering off (regardless of how strategically the VP is picked to balance the ticket) or even an independent candidate or two (Ross Perot redux) that will shape the 2012 race toward a guranteed second term for Obama.

11.) SKYPE -- I didn't use it because Oprah told me to -- but instead we embraced it at work as a strategy for enhancing the work place now that many of us (including me) work from home. We use it to approximate the water cooler and I've risen to the challenge of speaking in symbolic Skype emoticons whenever possible. It's made my work life that much more enjoyable since I started working remotely some 14 months ago.

12.) WARM CLIMATES -- It's my age (and don't get it wrong, I can still appreciate the Snowmageddon that we had on LSD last February), but if I slip away to rest and relax, it's to somewhere warm. The Hollywood/Miami and Palm Desert areas are now regular stops on my vacation itinerary (I just look better after I've sunned and released that 1/16th American Indian background of mine) -- and I can't wait to get there next week. Makes a boy think about early retirement (I can still say that while I'm in my thirties for another few days, right?)!

I hope your life is just as full of things about which you can rave -- after all, we may not be here next year at this time if the Mayans were right -- so it may make sense for all of your glasses to be half full in 2012. May you and the ones you love have the happiest of New Years!

(now ... I'm running late for my golden tee time and my NYE bar crawl ...)

GO FOR THE MUSIC, GO FOR THE GOLDEN TEE, GO FOR THE LOCATION -- JUST GO:
http://tracechicago.com/

MARTINA MARTINA MARTINA:
http://martinamcbride.com/news/43281

IT'S NOT SCIENCE FICTION -- IT'S WHAT THEY DO EVERY DAY:
http://airforce.com/

December 30, 2011

Random Flashback for Friday 12/30/11



Ok ... last picture of the holidays (well, from the holidays some 20 years ago).


This one is of my biological mother out in America's wild west by her Montanian Christmas tree in 1991 (or maybe 1992 -- those two years got mixed up in my photo album somehow).


Speaking of 1992 -- those flashbacks start in earnest in seven days (where I'll wrap up a rocky semester at LVC, say goodbye to my time at Hills Department Store and end up in Uniontown PA)!


Happy New Year! Let's bring on 2012/1992!!

December 29, 2011

Random Thought for Thursday 12/29/11

An open note to all of you who use the heart emoticon in your status updates and other communications ...

... on my smart phone and computers, it shows up like this: <3

... which, because I'm childishly ignorant sometimes, makes me think "breasts" and not "heart" -- like it's some aerial view of some endowed upper parts

... although if I had more occasion to symbolically communicate "breasts" in my texts, I would know that the powers that be have already established that to be (o)(o)

... or ($)($) for those that have been artificially enhanced

... so I guess I should just join modern times and learn to ♥ <3.

10 FUN THINGS YOU DIDN'T KNOW ABOUT EMOTICONS:
http://www.neatorama.com/2009/05/05/10-things-you-didnt-know-about-emoticons/

4 OPTIONS FOR THE HEART EMOTICON:
http://www.sharpened.net/emoticons/smiley/heart

ARTIFICIAL FRENCH BREASTS ARE NO LAUGHING MATTER RIGHT NOW:
http://www.euronews.net/2011/12/20/mass-breast-implant-recall-in-france/

December 28, 2011

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 12/28/11

Izakayas.

Used in a sentence: "I guess it goes to show you how much I happily eat at home as I was completely oblivious but happy to learn a new word when I saw 2011's five hottest dining trends -- one of which was the spread of Izakayas (sake-centric Japanese small-plates eateries)."

It sounds like something to try out (after all, I do enjoy tapas as a meal plan) -- although I've had octopus and miso each only once fixed Japanese-style and didn't like them, so I'm not sure what my selections would be. And sake links to ouzo when my mind plays word association -- to which my only exposure was pretending to have drunk it in excess in the climax of Barefoot in the Park back in my acting heyday at LVC (shout-outs to my drunk acting ouzo partner in crime, Sarah T and my fellow Barefootians Shawn W and Brigette C -- looking forward to the 20th anniversary of that production coming up next year in my Friday flashbacks)!

And, to close the loop on this randomness, we could all toast with Japanese Sapporo (something I do enjoy ...)

YOU MUST BE 21 TO VIEW THIS SITE (IT's ALCOHOL, NOT SEX):
http://www.sapporousa.com/lda/?ref=http://www.sapporousa.com/

TAKING OVER THE WORLD MIGHT BE A TOUCH HYPERBOLIC:
http://www.budgettravel.com/feature/why-you-need-to-know-what-an-iizakayai-is,7131/

AS I PLAN MY BIRTHDAY TRIP, PERHAPS A STOP HERE TO FEEL YOUNG AND HIP?:
http://chowhound.chow.com/topics/796080

December 27, 2011

Random Tune for Tuesday 12/27/11

Admittedly, it's a bit anti-climactic.

When I started this every-other-week selection of a random tune that would follow alphabetically through the nearly 600 cassettes I accumulated in the 90's (a vast majority courtesy of multiple bites of the 12-cassettes-for-1-cent apples offered by the evil Columbia House queen), I just assumed that I would have a tape for every letter. But, as it turns out -- and as this all comes to a close this final Tuesday of 2011 -- I never had an X, Y or Z in my eccentric and eclectic bunch.

But that doesn't mean I can't randomly select a tune from a group that should be in my collection .. and that I can't find one that somehow ties directly into my hometown of the last decade plus ... and that it can't be a tribute to the blues ...

Z is for ZZTOP:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jV5ioewi4pk&feature=related

December 26, 2011

Random Memorial for Monday 12/26/11

Gone but not forgotten: the old way of opening a car trunk.

I got to play a little Kinect yesterday (and I do mean "little" ... I did one round of the Wipeout game and then promptly had to nap -- a side effect of my rapid approach to forty I guess), which reminded me that the same technology has been applied to the Ford 2013 Escape SUV.

Namely ... so long as you have the fob in your pocket, you can simply kick your foot under the back bumper, and the motion will release the automatic door for you. Between that and the kids flying the drones as military maneuvers, it appears that video game technology is the new space shuttle technology which, in its time, had replaced Jetson references.

Dropping the groceries while you fumbled for the keys and attempted to balance everything in one arm or leaned it all against the car planning to do the rapid fire switcheroo (like folks do when they flip a stack of quarters off your elbow) ... you will not be missed.

LUCKILY, SAFETY MECHANISM IS INCLUDED FOR WHEN AN ANIMAL RUNS UNDER:
http://caradvice.askpatty.com/ask_patty_/2011/12/2013-ford-escape-you-will-get-a-kick-out-of-this.html

JUST DON'T USE IT WITH THE FISH EYE LENS:
http://123kinect.com/review/wipeout-2-kinect/

BEING SHIRTLESS APPARENTLY HELPS:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W_UFxvOcKNY

December 25, 2011

Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 12/25/11

What South Bend, Mishawaka and Osceola are talking about this week:

Although back in Chicago now, most of the weekend was spent with family in Indiana ... and clearly everyone there was talking about Christmas. [The local paper did, however, have a warning about how the vicious game of "Knockdown King" was spreading throughout the midwest ... but that's really a downer on the holiday spirit, so I'll save that bit o' news for another day (and the link is below, for those who want to be in-the-know regardless).] It was great catching up with all (pics to show up sometime sooner than seven months from now as I did for most of 2011 [except for the traditional shot of Dolly's butt mid-Christmas-cookery, as I've agreed that's now just for family and never to appear on FB -- so if you're family and you want an autographed copy, hit me up privately]).

In all seriousness and in the words of one of my favorite songs of the season (covered by so many great artists):

May the new year be blessed with good tidings ... 'Til the next time I see you again ... If we must say goodbye ... Let the spirit go with you ... And we'll love and we'll laugh ... In the time that we had ... 'Til the season comes 'round again.

Merry Christmas!

THE AMY GRANT VERSION:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p3KZrEn90ao

OR, IF YOUR TASTE IS OTHERWISE, THE KENNY ROGERS VERSION:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p3KZrEn90ao

BEWARE THE GAME OF KNOCKDOWN KING:
http://www.southbendtribune.com/sns-ap-us-thrill-assaults,0,7256486.story

December 24, 2011

Random Soapbox for Saturday 12/24/11

I don't mean to go off on a rave here, but ...

... (of course it's a rave ... it is Christmas Eve after all ... neither Santa nor Jesus would want me to be ranting this close to Christmas) ... and even though my favorite holiday is still New Year's Eve, this weekend's celebration has been a great one so far.

From the tunes on the drive in (could Sugarland's Christmas CD replace the classic ones from Amy Grant as my all time favorite? Do better compilation collections exist than the 2005 and 2006 Bath and BodyWorks double CD sets?) to the fact that everyone is home (Jac's on leave, Teddy and Heather are in our state this year and even Robert's skulking about in the background -- plus it's Trevor's first year with us all) ...

... from the fact that my sister's homemade cookies arrived intact yesterday even though they were mailed to the wrong address (thanks again, neighbor!) to the feast that I know is being prepared for tomorrow (I've suggested a bacon garnish for every dish) ...

... from the annual family game (this year, we perverted The Game of Things as only we can) to the quality time I get to spend with all of the animals while here in Indiana (three dogs, three cats and a turtle) ...

It may be the farthest thing from a silent night when we all get together ... but I wouldn't have it any other way. For 14 years and running in this familial configuration, it is indeed ... a Merry Christmas for me and mine.

Assuming you celebrate, may it be the same for you and yours.

YOU CAN PLAY IT STRAIGHT OR YOU CAN PLAY IT TWISTED ...:
http://www.buy.com/pr/product.aspx?sku=213257030&sellerid=25400168

FROM THE ALBUM "GOLD AND GREEN":
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KFUjDFV9Mog

2 CD SETS 2 YEARS RUNNING IN 2005 and 2006:
http://www.last.fm/music/Various+Artists/Bath+%2526+Body+Works+Holiday+Music+2005%253A+The+Perfect+Christmas+%2528disc+1%253A+Sparkle%2529

December 23, 2011

Random Flashback for Friday 12/23/11





There are 4 easy ways to know -- just at a glance --that this picture is 20 years old (from Cmas 1991).


1 -- the hair (that spot of the back of my skull in the modern day is bare and growing)!


2 -- the giant eyeglasses (I had probably picked up contacts by this time, but hadn't put them in what with the excitement of Cmas morning)!


3 -- the provocative angle of the shot (the Lindsays and the Britneys of the world hadn't yet taught us all to cross our legs when being photographed -- although I'm sure I'm wearing boxers ...)!


4 -- the gift (it is a boombox, after all, just a year or two post Say Anything ...)!


May your boombox dreams (or whatever the 2011 equivalent) come true this holiday season!

December 22, 2011

Random Thought for Thursday 12/22/11

It's a busy time of year, so sometimes things fall by the wayside.

Of course, rest and relaxation are right around the corner, what with Christmas this weekend in South Bend and New Year's weekend back in Chitown and my milestone birthday in sunny Florida (note to Florida, please do be sunny in a fortnight).

But, in the spirit of tying up loose ends ... First, I forgot to mention the other Saturday (12.10) that the countdown to the end of the world was at 375 days. Just, you know, in case that would make you change your lifestyle or start making a list. And second, I forgot to provide my final Amazing Race Aside after the season finale (the down side of watching TV when you want to based on how full the DVR is ...), so here's 3 things I learned in that season final episode:

1.) I still haven't decided if I feel safer or scared-er after watching the flight simulator exercise.
2.) I think I said this previously, but I'm always less than impressed by the half-hearted clapping on display when the winning team(s) run toward the mat past the eliminated players.
3.) I know I said this previously, but I'm always tickled that there is just as much (if not more) of a language barrier issue when the teams are back in America for the final challenges.

FLORIDA WEATHER IN JANUARY:
http://goflorida.about.com/od/allaboutflorida/a/january.htm

ANYONE WHO WAS WITH ME IN MEXICO IN 07 KNOWS I NEED THIS INFO:
http://www.gosunsmart.org/yourskin/yourskin_protection.shtml

TAXI TIPS (although language barrier's are barely addressed):
http://www.poundtaxi.com/taxi-tips/general-tips

December 21, 2011

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 12/21/11

App-cessory.

Used in a sentence: "It's the new holiday toy trend -- the app-cessory!"

Look I don't belong to the i-cult. But I have seen others join (someone close to me recently did, and now every other conversation is about something the i-phone can do). And I do have a smart phone now too (an Android -- sorry Stevie Jobs) but I'm very limited in what I've added to it. And I still compute on a laptop or a desktop instead of a tablet.

That being said, I did find what I thought was the best use of the iPad -- the iCade Arcade Cabinet. It costs just shy of a Benjamin, but you plop your iPad into the interface and you have a desktop arcade game at your fingertips. I feel like my fortitude is strong enough so that this app-cessory won't make me want to pledge my allegiance to all things that start with a little 'i', but it did catch my big eye this holiday season. Must ... resist ... conversion ...

THE iCADE ARCADE SYSTEM:
http://www.google.com/products/catalog?hl=en&q=icade+arcade+cabinet&gbv=2&gs_upl=203l4359l0l4484l20l18l0l4l4l0l281l1717l2.4.4l10l0&um=1&ie=UTF-8&tbm=shop&cid=5661364965351870483#

THAT's APPCESSORIES tm TO YOU:
http://www.bestbuy.com/site/Appcessories/All-Appcessories-Products/pcmcat255100050015.c?id=pcmcat255100050015

MUST ... RESIST ... CONVERSION ...:
https://market.android.com/details?id=apps_topselling_free&hl=en

December 20, 2011

Random Tune for Tuesday 12/20/11

It's time for my second of three postings honoring those who passed in 2011 (my so called annual dead celebrity tune trilogy). And, since the concept of "celebrity" is super-stretched in our society right now, I feel OK about providing a tune on which the late Marion Holmes Defore was featured (along with Art Kassel and his Kassels in the Air). She was 93 when she passed last month (which explains the black and white images in the youtube video at the link below) -- and I settled on this song after not being able to find a copy of her singing "I'm a Little Teapot" (my first choice and her most well known tune).

I DIDN'T WANNA DO IT ... I DIDN'T WANNA DO IT ...:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ogNhw1zSME4

December 19, 2011

Random Memorial for Monday 12/19/11

Gone but not forgotten (the speed round): [What a weekend ... too many options ... so just choose the one that resonates most with you from the list ... ]

Kim Jong Il --> with the possible exception of your closest friends and family, you and your blindness to the world around you will not be missed (unless your son is a chip off the old commie bloc, and then we might all become more familiar with the phrase "the devil you know is better than the one you don't).

Bears playoff chances --> it was just 4 few weeks ago (pre-thumb-wound) when everyone was of the opinion that we had a guaranteered spot at least until late January, so our purported place in the playoffs will be missed (and baseball starts in how many days?).

Havel --> you who proved that the pen can indeed be mightier than the sword, you will be missed.

Saab --> oddly placed ignition that made it seem like we were in a small airplane, you will be missed now that you've been given up on by your corporate daddy.

Kobe's marriage --> as, in my opinion, you should have ended after you were raping and pillaging the hotel help years ago, you will not be missed (except, quite possibly, by your children, to whom you must now explain why you can't keep it in your pants ...).

Jon Bon Jovi --> seeing as how it was a twitter hoax today after all, the headlines that would have been bad puns based on your hit songs (surely they can do something with Wanted Dead or Alive, Never Say Goodbye or Livin' on a Prayer), you will be missed (at least until they come out again some later rainy day when you do pass -- for reals ...).

IF ONLY THE NUKES WEREN'T IN THE MIX:
http://www.reuters.com/article/2011/12/19/us-korea-north-idUSTRE7BI05B20111219

MAYBE A 2% CHANCE LEFT:
http://blogs.suntimes.com/bears/2011/12/hanie_falters_again_in_bears_3.html

CZECH, PLEASE ...:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-16246922

THE BEST THING TO COME OUT OF NEW JERSEY?:
http://80music.about.com/od/artistsae/tp/topbonjovisongs.htm

THE RING DIDN'T MEAN A THING:
http://latino.foxnews.com/latino/entertainment/2011/12/19/kobe-bryants-latina-wife-knew-about-multiple-women/

THE PEOPLE OF TROLLHATTAN ARE HOLDING OUT HOPE:
http://www.usatoday.com/money/autos/story/2011-12-19/saab-bankruptcy/52064104/1

December 18, 2011

Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 12/18/11

What Chicago is talking about this week:

The Greater Chicago Food Depository.

And there's no scandal here. It's just the local county not for profit food bank, which also has a well coordinated volunteer program. I posted pics on Friday, but I just can't say enough about the organization (I joined people from work in a larger group that included a bunch of White Sox fans and Southpaw, apparently the team mascot [sorry, I live within spitting distance of Wrigley], who entertained the crowds before we started [and second sorry, it was probably wrong for me to ask if you guys liked Ozzie because you really did or because you had to as dedicated fans]). Our task was creating bags of goodies for school kids to take home on the weekends if they lived in a suboptimal situation -- called Nourish for Knowledge.

Tour the facility, donate money, volunteer as an individual or in a group ... and that's just a few of the things that can be done -- not just this season, but all year round!

HOW CAN YOU HELP?:
http://www.chicagosfoodbank.org/site/PageServer

NOURISH FOR KNOWLEDGE:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q6Rqh2nRdko

AVAILABLE FOR YOUR PARTY (NOT QUITE THE PHILLIE PHANATIC ...):
http://chicago.whitesox.mlb.com/cws/community/southpaw.jsp

December 17, 2011

Random Soapbox for Saturday 12/17/11

I don't mean to go off on a rant here, but ...

... when did the sports section of the paper get so controversial?

And I'm not talking about the scandals of late (that makes my heart hurt too much), but instead about these gems that are actual stories I've seen in the last few months:

1.) A 16 year old high school football student in Ohio was sentenced to 90 days after he slipped a thumbtack into his glove for the postgame handshake with the rival team.

2.) Turkey decided that soccer teams that had been sanctioned for unruly behavior would no longer be allowed to admit men as spectators -- only women and children could watch.

3.) An Israeli national woman's basketball player was kept out of a game because she wore a tshirt underneath her jersey so that her shoulders would be covered in observance with her Orthodox Jewish modesty rules.

4.) A US sprinter attended the world track and field championships hindered by blistered feet because he wore wet socks into a cryogenic chamber.

5.) Tailgating fans of the Detroit Lions were kicked out of a parking lot "stripper bus" called the "booty lounge" because it was determined to be illegal.

6.) Two kids were kicked off of their high school football team because they failed to meet the residency requirements (they stayed with their mom elsewhere on the weekends, and she complained on facebook that they couldn't clean up their bedrooms even thought they only lived with her on Sat and Sun).

7.) Experts testifying at a Senate committee on concussions and the marketing of sports equipment took major companies to task for jumping on the bandwagon and selling equipment that creates "brain safety space" -- even though there was no scientific evidence backing up the claims.

8.) And my favorite most controversial sports story of the last few months .... Iran cracked down on immoral goal-scoring celebrations and two players were banned after Mohammed was caught squeezing the backside of teammate Sheis after a winning goal was scored. (Although I should probably research that to make sure those two weren't stoned.)

Oh for the old fashioned days when it was just scores that were reported in the daily papers -- when thumbtacks were on a bulletin board, when Turkish men controlled themselves, when shoulders were allowed to be covered, when people knew that wet clothes shouldn't go near things that would freeze them, when strippers stayed off buses, when moms didn't tattle on their sons, when concussions weren't the stuff of a marketing gimmick and when guys could squeeze each other's asses all day long without issue (in a sports kind of way, of course ...)

SORRY BRO ... HAND PRICKING IS NOT COOL:
http://www.sorrybrosports.com/2011/10/thumbtack-handshakes-are-illegal-hs.html

DETROIT STRIPPER BUS ... NOW WITH PICTURES!:
http://bustedcoverage.com/2011/09/28/detroits-booty-lounge-stripper-tailgating-bus-whats-the-problem-30-photos/

THE BUTT SQUEEZE THAT MAY HAVE LED TO 74 LASHES:
http://bustedcoverage.com/2011/09/28/detroits-booty-lounge-stripper-tailgating-bus-whats-the-problem-30-photos/

December 16, 2011

Random Flashback for Friday 12/16/11





I've spent the last few weeks going through pictures of my biological mother's children's young ones. This last one in that series is the one exception, as, in 1991, my sister Sherry hadn't birthed any offspring yet ...


... but she did come to visit me and we went to Hebron Church for the Christmas Eve service (with me in an all too red tie, no?) after first stopping by the family tree for a posed shot. Since I was just about to turn 20, this family tree dates to my time spent with the Woodwards, the family that took me in when I ran away from home in high school.


[As a side note, I can't run through all of my father's children's young ones as there aren't enough weeks this holiday season (nor do I have pictures) of the nearly dozen people he either sired or took care of in a blended family way throughout his many marriages.]


Happy Holidays to you and your loved ones -- whether family by biology or family because of the strong relationships formed with them even though they are not in the blood line.

December 15, 2011

Random Thought for Thursday 12/15/11

My biological father is still alive.

To be clear, he wasn't put on the fast track toward a demise, or anything. He's living out his final days slowly but surely in the local nursing home in PA.

But I did expect my cell phone to ring last night with that news -- mostly because I could not fall asleep and wrestled with his spirit for what seemed like two hours. Maybe it's the accumulation of medicine in my system now that I'm recovering from an illness or maybe it's my impending milestone birthday, but for some reason, I hit the sheets with a very specific memory in my head.

And then, suddenly, all the synapses in my brain started firing and I was flooded with scraps of my interactions with him over the years. It's not like we've ever been extremely close (he was of the generation that let his wives take care of the kiddies in the house -- rest assured, he had one of those at a time -- he's not a polygamist), but I just couldn't keep them from coming. My coping mechanism kicked in, and I started compartmentalizing the bits and pieces of recollections under some kind of timeline just to deal with the onslaught.

Which, in turn, led me to my biggest takeaway of the unsettled time I spent attempting to fall asleep -- the realization that when I came into being at the end of the first week of the year 1972, my father was well on his way to the half century mark in his life. So, other than the stories I've picked up along the way, there are five decades of unknowns when it comes to that man.

But ... he's still alive. I just don't know if I can get anything out of him in the state he's in. And, at least last night, that caused me to lose sleep. To be continued ... ?

MY PERSONAL GENERATION "CANYON" ... APPLIED TO THE BUSINESS ENVIRONMENT:
http://ezinearticles.com/?Companies-Face-a-Generation-Canyon&id=6579455

A POPULAR DREAM TOPIC THIS YEAR:
http://gagascorner.blogspot.com/2011/03/last-night-i-dreamed-my-dad-died-second.html

WHERE HE'S LIVING OUT THE END OF HIS LIFE:
http://www.luthercare.org/

December 14, 2011

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 12/14/11

Smishing.

Used in a sentence: "It's so hard to keep up with the kids and their toys these days -- and even harder to keep up with the people who prey on the kids and their toys these days -- but now on the heels of phishing and pharming and vishing comes smishing, trickery now delivered to you the consumer by way of text message."

Would that it were more like the joy of smushing as brought to us by those Jersey Shore folks, but instead it appears to be the permission we need to get paranoid about every electronic interaction we have. My solution -- I'll be assigning safe words to each of you with whom I electronically interact on a regular basis.

Come to think of it, I guess could employ that same safe word technique as it relates to smushing as well. If you and I fall into that category with regards to our interactions ... well, I'll text you separately.

BEWARE THE SMISH:
http://www.consumeraffairs.com/news04/2006/11/smishing.html

SPLITTING ELECTRONIC ATTACK HAIRS? SEE THE DEFINITIONS HERE:
http://security.intuit.com/phishing.html

IN CASE YOU'RE BEHIND ON YOUR JERSEY SHORE SLANG:
http://remotecontrol.mtv.com/2009/12/17/jersey-slang-part-two-what-it-means-to-go-smush-yourself/

December 13, 2011

Random Tune for Tuesday 12/13/11

So ... I don't have any performers who start with the letter Y in my eccentric and eclectic cassette collection either (I didn't have anyone with an X two weeks ago ... and newsflash a fortnight early ... I don't have anyone with a Z either).

No Yes or Yaz or Yardbirds or Young, Neil made it to my stash back in the day (although Mr. Young does appear on a Pearl Jam mixtape of "Rockin in the Free World" ...)

Which leaves me torn. I could play someone's version of "I Told You So" in honor of the fact the clinic called today to say I do have strep throat after all (they denied it on Sunday) ... but, instead, I'll turn to a holiday tune.

And in the most random of finds, here's a spoof of Young MC's classic "Bust-a-Move" -- done up as a rap battle between Santa and Jack Frost and Frosty. And done up by someone who should never be allowed to parody any rap song ever again as a matter of public policy.

Happy Holidays!

Y is for YOUNG MC (whose song is parodied in this oh-so-bad-it's-good holiday rap battle):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cr4k_LE1xek

December 12, 2011

Random Memorial for Monday 12/12/11

Gone but not forgotten: swallowing without the sensation of there being razor blades in my throat.

I'm on Day 4 of this particular unpleasantness. The pharmacy minute-clinic personnel assured me (after waiting two-score-dozen minutes to see them) that it was a viral sore throat and not strep (unless their results say something otherwise tomorrow). However, I can almost guarantee I'll wake up in the morning with this illness having passed me by. Why? Because I had scheduled this past Friday and Monday off of work to make a long pre-holiday weekend, and I return to work tomorrow. So of course I'll be better in the morn ...

Days of healthy otolaryngological experiences, you are sorely [pun intended] missed.

IT'S THE OLDEST MEDICAL PROFESSION IN THE US (LIKE HOOKING, NO?):
http://www.entnet.org/HealthInformation/otolaryngologist.cfm

I MEANT METAPHORICALLY, NOT LITERALLY:
http://bodyodd.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2010/11/01/5376560-swallow-hard-docs-job-is-to-remove-razor-blades-bedsprings

I'M ONE OF THE "FLOCK":
http://www.boston.com/news/local/massachusetts/articles/2009/03/12/sick_flocking_to_in_store_clinics/?page=full

December 11, 2011

Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 12/11/11

What Chicago is talking about this week:

It's not usually right to delight in the misfortune of others, but I think we all agree that this case can be the exception. I'm referring to the mugging in the last few days on the southwest side perpetrated by one Anthony Miranda. Well -- almost perpetrated. Turns out the guy he went after was cage-fighter trained. And turns out one Anthony Miranda was made to shoot himself in his ankle, was beat up and held down until the cops arrived and was photographed for his mug shot with two black eyes and other facial wounds to go with his wounded pride. Stupid mugger thug wannabe ...

THE MIRANDA MUG SHOT:
http://www.hispanicallyspeakingnews.com/notitas-de-noticias/details/top-tip-for-muggers-make-sure-your-mark-is-not-a-ufc-fighter/12332/

NOT EXCLUSIVELY AN AMERICAN STORY -- HERE'S THE SCOTTISH VERSION IN 2009:
http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/weird-news/2009/11/05/scots-cage-fighter-sends-four-muggers-fleeing-in-terror-86908-21799069/

AND HERE'S THE TRANSVESTITE VERSION AS WELL:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1218651/Thugs-attack-men-dresses--turn-cage-fighters.html

December 10, 2011

Random Soapbox for Saturday 12/10/11

I don't mean to go off on a rant here, but ...

... and maybe I should start with a disclaimer in that I'm sick. Not the "had too much Guinness last night" kind of fogginess, or the "spent most of my day on the new cushioned toilet seat" kind of unpleasantry ... but the "wow I can barely swallow, some thing's about to burst out of my eardrum and my epiglottis is ON FIRE" malady that I've been chasing by mixing any cold medication I can find in the bathroom medicine cabinet (including those alka seltzer cold fizzies that they took off the market because old people were having strokes after ingesting them). Which is just my long way to say ... if I cross a line, here, it's the medicine talking.

Oh right -- the weekly rant. Dear lady neighbors who moved into the 3rd floor apartment above the one I'm in: I sincerely hope that the hour of pounding on the floor the other night was you getting a carpet installed or having the wooden floors refurbished -- because if it's what I think it is, and you're concerned about the fact that you can hear my television, I'm afraid that I'm going to have to call out your behavior as the passive aggressive mess that it was.

If you think that I can't outlast your pounding -- well then you have another proverbial think coming. Because I come from a long line of stubborn Prussian stock (Kaiser Wilhelm learned his obstinacy from my father's peeps back in the day) that will out wait any attempts you make at throwing some kind of temper tantrum to make me change my behavior. We'll talking all kinds of stubbornness as wide as a country mile (which is apparently still just 5280 feet and all, but it comes with a spit and a holler of aw-shucks charm). So -- pound away.

Or -- better yet -- adjust your expectations. I'm not sure what you were thinking moving into a building surrounded by all kinds of bar folk who will drink and hoot and holler all times of day and night (if you didn't see it -- that was an 11am Santa inspired bar crawl I watched go past my sickbed bedroom window today). Not to mention that Wrigley Field is a stone's throw away -- (and, since you moved in on the off-season, please know now that there will be approximately 40,000 alcohol soaked fans milling about all summer long -- although, if tradition holds, that activity will go away as soon as the post-season arrives) and that the elevated tracks go right past the back porch -- so close that I can usually see who's reading what on the red and purple lines.

In addition to the constant ambient noise (did I mention that the tornado warning system is a few houses down, next to one of the most active fire stations in the 'hood?), it's also just as much true that this old building is hear-through, if you know what I mean. I will know when you entertain gentleman callers, and I will know the scope of said entertainment. If you even so much as strain while eliminating your waste, I'm going to hear it. And I'm not a mean person -- I'll be rooting for you to be successful in both of those scenarios.

Finally -- there will be a lot of television noise that you'll be hearing -- because I do so watch a lot of TV. If you were listening last Sunday night, you might have pieced together that it was the penultimate episode of this season's race that I was watching, and then, together, you and I could have learned these three things (it's my Amazing Race Aside for the week):

1.) When a challenge starts at 4am in the morning on the streets of Brussels, your only local assistance is going to be the drunks coming out of the bars.

2.) Neither Charlie Chaplin nor Buster Keaton nor Harold Lloyd is Belgian, but nice try ...

3.) It turns out that the Countess didn't make it up. There's a statue of Ferdinand De Lesseps (in Panama) -- he is royalty after all!

I THINK IT'S META-RACIST ... STUFF WHITE PEOPLE LIKE #30:
http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.com/2008/01/27/30-wrigley-field/

THE COUNT AND HIS ROLE IN THE CANAL (PRE-HOUSEWIVES HISTORY):
http://www.ared.com/history.htm

IT BEGAN AT 8AM and WAS TO HAVE INCLUDED OVER 10000 PEOPLE:
http://chicago.cbslocal.com/2011/12/01/best-holiday-bar-crawl-tbox-2011/

December 9, 2011

Random Flashback for Friday 12/9/11





And here's the last of the photos of my mother's grandchildren that I've featured the last few Friday flashbacks (disclaimer: as of twenty years ago in '91, my sister Sherry's kids hadn't arrived yet, so I'll find some other way to represent her next week).


This is baby Casey Jo (my sister Sharon's daughter) pausing just briefly from scoping out what was underneath the Christmas tree.


For a pictorial representation of how quickly babies grow into fully functional young people, take a look at the post of Casey Jo's "home from the hospital photo" on 2/26/10 and her "baby's first Christmas" pic on 1/7/11.


Soon enough these babies will be having babies of their own -- and then I'll be referring to future flashbacks with my mother in the role of great grandmother instead!


Happy Holidays!! [No -- I'm not taking a stand on the new "greeting crusades" -- just too lazy to list out those that are celebrated by all my friends this time of year]!

December 8, 2011

Random Thought for Thursday 12/8/11

If Biebs is chastely going to wait for "shawty" under the misteltoe, and he's only 5'5" -- how tiny does that girl have to be?

And do those who speak "street" call the gals who play ball at Rutgers "shawty" too -- like in some ironic oxymoronic way?

[Feel free to stop cringing -- I'm not going to Imus myself and refer descriptively to those same players by their hair type, mostly because I've seen Chris Rock's documentary "Good Hair" and know better, but also because I don't think I'm a racist.]

Just wonderin' ...

OF COURSE I CAN FIND A BLOG POST ABOUT JUSTIN'S HEIGHT:
http://www.justbie.com/how-tall-is-justin-bieber/2251/

OF COURSE I CAN RELIVE THE IMUS ISSUE and OTHER INAPPROPRIATE REMARKS:
http://mediamatters.org/research/200704040011

OF COURSE WE'RE ALREADY REMINISCING ABOUT THE 00's:
http://www.inthe00s.com/archive/inthe00s/smf/1205714154.shtml

December 7, 2011

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 12/7/11

Colored Margarine Table-side Ban.

Used in a sentence: "Amidst all of the political discourse leading into next year's presidential election, some folks north of the local border are focused on the right legislative agenda -- overturning the colored margarine table-side ban."

I always get a chuckle about obscure laws still on the books. In case you slip into Wisconsin, just know that if you eat in a restaurant there, you can't get colored margarine unless you make a special request. And if you get in trouble and wind up in a Cheesehead prison -- you're not going to get the healthy stuff unless you're a vegan or someone with a noted health concern (which costs the taxpayers 3x more).

Some are trying to get it overturned (and running into the well organized butter lobby) so it remains to be seen if they are successful. You heard it hear first -- if you're going to Wisconsin this holiday, pack your own Country Crock!

THE OLEO WARS:
http://www.wisconsinhistory.org/wmh/pdf/wmh_autumn01_strey.pdf

FIGHT THE BUTTER POWERS THAT BE:
http://consumerist.com/2011/10/wisconsin-rep-seeks-to-repeal-anti-margarine-law.html

COMPARE AND DECIDE AND RECOMMEND TO YOUR WISCONSIN SENATOR:
http://www.cspinet.org/nah/articles/spreads.html

December 6, 2011

Random Tune for Tuesday 12/6/11

For at least the third year in a row ... it's time to bring back (not because anybody asked ... just because I'm a little odd) ... the Dead Celebrity Tune Trilogy. First up -- a tune from Joseph Brooks, who passed this summer.

And, since I am just as much twisted as I am a little odd, I guess I feel comfortable sharing that it turns out Joseph died from self-inflicted asphyxiation by helium, just before he was headed to trial for allegedly being a serial casting couch assaultist in his older age.

So even though I usually only provide one link ... I'll include both the now dead composer in a clip and the more famous Debby Boone version (who, to be clear, is NOT DEAD -- and, at the rate her daddy Pat is going, has quite a few years to go if the genetic trait was passed on to her), just in case you'd rather have your life lit up by one over the other.

IN THE STUDIO (WITH NO COUCH IN SIGHT):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QQTOcdU88fg

THE ONE ASSOCIATED WITH THIS SONG WHO DIDN'T DIE LAST YEAR:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fQpl_JFHya0

December 5, 2011

Random Memorial for Monday 12/5/11

Gone but not forgotten: about half of the things underneath the Christmas tree.

No -- nothing else was stolen from the apartment, nor did I reduce my friends and family by 50%, and contrary to what you might think, this isn't a recessionary strategy for getting through the 2011 holidays.

It is however, a sad commentary on the weekend, when I pulled out all of the cmas decorations, which had been housed in the special storage space in the building's basement, and discovered that the bottom bin had taken on water during this past summer's flooding (see post on 7.24.11). Since I decorate around the tree with holiday tins collected from year to year, it's also where the ornaments have been stored.

In an odd twist -- those same tins protected almost all of the ornaments (including the hand crocheted ones from my mom and my mom's mom which now have a musty smell -- but so did my mom's mom's place -- it's where I learned what mothballs were, after all) ... but they ended up sacrificing themselves in the process as they turned rusty and nasty.

It was a brief moment of sadness -- but there are those who lose a lot more in other things that truly are disasters -- so a moment of silence and out to the dumpster they went (where they were picked up within the hour by the scrap metal pickers that patrol the city's 'hood).

And tonight ... the tree gets decorated!

Since you can so easily be replaced and re-collected in the years ahead, rusty holiday tins I've discarded that have now been re-purposed by some dumpster diver, you really won't be missed that much.

OUR SUMMER FLOOD (FOUR MONTHS AGO):
http://articles.cnn.com/2010-07-24/us/illinois.chicago.flooding_1_flood-warning-outages-storms?_s=PM:US

TEN THINGS YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT MOLD:
http://www.epa.gov/mold/moldresources.html#Ten_Things

NON-GIFTY SUGGESTIONS FOR UNDER THE TREE DECORATING:
http://voices.yahoo.com/decorate-under-christmas-tree-2281418.html

December 4, 2011

Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 12/4/11

What Chicago is talking about this week:

The YELLOW DOT comes to IDOT!

It kind of reminds me of the stickers you're supposed to put on your window so that the firepeople save your pets -- but the hot new item for the old people in your life (baby boomers aren't getting any younger) is a yellow dot to put on the car. The color is chosen to hearken to the "golden hour" after a crash when the EMTs often make decisions that determine whether you live or die, and the concept is to keep your key medical records in a yellow envelope in the glovebox so that first responders can make informed decisions.

Some nay-sayers say that the yellow dot makes you a target for theft of those same records -- and others say that the true solution is to be able to download your records into an OnStar like device ... but if you have a loved older one who hasn't given up their drivers license yet, you may want to do the research, see if Yellow Dot is in your state, and prepare for the future.

Speaking of older people, like the couple who went home last week on one of my favorite competition reality shows, here's my Amazing Race Aside with three things I learned from last week's episode:

1.) When posing in Speedos, be sure to smile -- it's what the audience wants.
2.) Beersel is apparently very hard to find in Brussels.
3.) Just like the Arch, one can climb inside the Atomium!

JUST ANNOUNCED: YELLOW DOT FROM THE IDOT!:
http://www.dot.state.il.us/press/r112211.html

NOT EVERYONE'S HAPPY ABOUT IT (ALTHOUGH THEY ARE SELLING SOMETHING):
http://yellowdotprogram.com/tag/yellow-dot-program-pa/

I WAS IN BRUSSELS IN 1990, BUT DIDN'T KNOW THEN ABOUT THE ATOMIUM:
http://www.brussels-belgium-travel-guide.com/atomium.html

December 3, 2011

Random Soapbox for Saturday 12/3/11

I don't mean to go off on a rant here, but ...

... it's time to call out a few more television ads that have crossed the line! I do everything I can to optimize my TV viewing (which means fast forwarding through ads as much as possible -- and a special "curses" to you, Rupert Murdoch, for disabling the feature on the FOX on demand shows), but occasionally an advert or two slips through.

And I've railed about companies using cartoons to lessen the load of uncomfortableness (like the Charmin bears so obsessed with a dinkleberry free life), so I wasn't as surprised that Luvs upped the load angle with the poop explosion pageant. If you haven't seen it (I understand now that it came out last January, but I just caught a glimpse of it recently), it's a competition between three racially and gender mixed cartoon babies, with scores being assigned to the one who can fill up his or her diaper with the biggest explosion of excrement. It's cheers all around -- particularly for the winner who gets the perfect score -- but it just sickened me. For those with a fetish, more power to you.

[I'm not a prude. As a matter of fact, I think scatological comedy has its place. Exhibit A: Raising Hope, which the TVLand awards should name as it's Instant Classic show for the next ceremony, recently featured a sweet love story told around the task of sifting through Maw Maw's poo. But it was handled in such a classy way ...]

The other commercial of late doesn't quite offend me in the same manner. And since I don't belong to the i-cult, it's a matter that doesn't affect me directly. But I am disappointed that the new iphone ads featuring Siri include so many exchanges with the automated wonder that do not include please and thank you. We're already a nation becoming unfamiliar with how to have actual human interactions, and I fear the day when we piss off the next Hal-like iteration and "they" take over. Let's keep Siri as happy as we can for as long as possible ...

IT's GONE NOTICED BY OTHERS AS WELL:
http://pocketcyclone.com/2011/10/24/lets-be-nice-to-siri/

BUT THEN AGAIN, SO HAS THIS ONE:
http://www.parenting.com/blogs/show-and-tell/lauren-parentingcom/luvs-poop-commercial-tmi-or-hilarious

AND IT's A SHAME IF YOU'VE NOT YET NOTICED THIS HILARIOUS SHOW:
http://cliqueclack.com/tv/2011/11/09/raising-hope-jimmy-kid/

December 2, 2011

Random Flashback for Friday 12/2/11





I'm going round robin here with my siblings' children as the holidays approach (well, those of my siblings that had children twenty years ago, as that's the whole premise behind my Flashback Fridays).


Last week was Bonnie's kids and next week is Sharon's child (Sherry's progeny came along later ...) ... so Holly's Ashlyn and Nic circa 1991 take the stage today.


Sadly, no amount of photo editing skills will tell me exactly what's just outside of the frame that has Ashlyn's attention ... but I'm sure it was something special!


Happy Holidays to you and yours!


December 1, 2011

Random Thought for Thursday 12/1/11

Well played, McDonalds ... well played. What a clever way to bypass the legislation in San Fran -- no more free Happy Meal Toys, but you can have them for a dime's donation to the Ronald McDonald House. When will folks realize that chubby children are cherubic, even if they might have a slightly earlier expiration date than their slimmer siblings?

And, how about focusing on the real legislation needed in California. Between the Walmart shoppers and the UC Davis rent-a-cops, shouldn't all of our call-a-politician campaign efforts be focused toward the total ban of pepper spray in this state? After all, Chicago bans the sale of spray paint cans and little bottles of alcohol because it knows I couldn't be trusted with access to that combo!

JUST AS WITH THE EUROZONE MELTDOWN, BLAME GREECE:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/national/higher-education/university-chancellor-under-pressure-after-campus-police-pepper-spray-students-at-occupy-camp/2011/11/23/gIQAssqIpN_story.html

HERE'S A DIME -- DOES NO ONE CARE?:
http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/money_co/2011/11/san-francisco-mcdonalds-start-selling-formerly-free-happy-meal-toys.html

CAUSE THE SUPREMES SAY WE CAN:
http://www.nytimes.com/1995/03/04/us/justice-stevens-allows-chicago-to-ban-spray-paint.html

November 30, 2011

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 11/30/11

Food Show Faux Pas.

Used in a sentence: "I love me some competition reality foodie shows, but two recent episodes (one of Top Chef and one of Next Iron Chef) left me with a bad taste in my mouth -- I know I definitely witnessed some Food Show Faux Pas (turns out that phrase is both plural and singular in print [it's pronounced differently if you're reading this out loud to your family] -- thanks, Frenchies!)."

The offensive scenes ...

... on Top Chef (Texas), there was a quick fire challenge using snake meat. The problem -- a snake was in an aquarium in the kitchen having to watch the culinary challenge unfold in front of him -- like sad family members who have to watch in silence as zombies feast on a loved one. (I also like me some post-apocalyptic shows like Walking Dead and Falling Skies and American Horror Story [not sure what apocalypse that's post, but it's in the same family if you ask me], so much show that when Lori peed on a stick and figured out she was pregnant, I had to force myself to cross off a Skitter and the RubberMan as potential fathers).

... and on Next Iron Chef, there was an "ingenuity" challenge using movie theatre snack bar treats. The Chef who drew gummi bears poured them into a pan and began to melt them en masse -- the camera lingered on the group gummi bear immolation, their little faces melting too quickly to yell out for help. All in all, it was a scarring scene of gummi bear genocide.

I'm just sayin' ...

AN IRON CHEF RECAP FOR EACH EPISODE BY A DEDICATED FAN:
http://blog.chron.com/tubular/2011/11/nextironchef-10929/

PADMA DID HAVE THE BEST LINE OF THE EPISODE:
http://articles.nydailynews.com/2011-11-17/news/30412309_1_snake-ty-lor-top-chef

FAUX PAS AS PER THE GRAMMARIST:
http://www.grammarist.com/usage/faux-pas/

November 29, 2011

Random Tune for Tuesday 11/29/11

2011 is rapidly drawing to a close, which brings me to the letter X in my year long series -- except that it turns out I don't have any artists with the letter X in my cassette collection (sorry Kandi Burress -- I just wasn't aware of your former group in the 80's and 90's when I was enrolled with multiple accounts at Columbia House). So now what?

With the holiday season upon us (the tree will be bought in 72 hours!), I'll turn to a 1999 tune that I probably would have added to my cassettes had it been an option back then -- sung by someone who has occasionally modified her first name to start with an X. (And, it's a tune that I once sang when I was a young-un on a cassette tape with my voice cracking at the high notes -- something I can still remember getting teased about so so many years later ...)

Speaking of holidays -- I abbreviate Christmas as Cmas instead of Xmas ... but I also say Happy Holidays all month long without any pangs of guilt ... To that point, and because I found this recent post of a Facebook connection of mine (credit assigned to Timothy Frantz as the author) to be pithy as it relates to the Christmas/Holidays viral debate ... I wanted to reproduce the majority of it here:

"I see a lot of this Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays stuff [...].

Jesus does not care if you say Merry Christmas or Happy Holidays. And neither should any of you. Christ is simply not that petty.

What's more important is that you remember that we live in a country with 4 million homeless, 47 million without health insurance and [millions of] Americans who suffer with HIV/AIDS and that 22% of all American children live in poverty [...]

You can say "Merry Christmas" all day long, but what matters is not the word Christmas. It's your actions and words that show what you stand for. Commit yourself to serving others and making a difference in the lives of those who may not be as fortunate as you. I think that is what Christ wants for all of us. That should be the Christmas/Holiday spirit.

Please don't be a petty paper Christian who gets offended when someone says 'Happy Holidays'. Say thank you -- and then serve others in the name of Christ and do good work."

X is indirectly for (with a bit of a stretch) XTINA (AGUILERA):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3-n3ckur73I&feature=related

November 28, 2011

Random Memorial for Monday 11/28/11

Gone but not forgotten: households with children in them.

I'm not speaking about some "Children of the Corn" or "Torchwood" fantastical situation, but the fact that census numbers now show that the share of households with children in them dropped from 36% in 2000 to 33.5% in 2010 (the static number of 38 million stayed the same, but the population growth changed the percentages). And, according to today's news, even past stalwarts like Hispanic communities are experiencing a plummeting birthrate (some say because of the recession, others say it's the "Americanization" of this particular ethnic group).

Now that there are more households with dogs than with children in them, the kiddies whom Whitney believed were our future ... you are already missed.

SOME SAY THAT's VERY "GREEN" OF US:
http://www.ecosphericblog.com/1245/2010-census-u-s-has-more-dogs-than-kids/

MOST THINK IT's RELATED TO THE RECESSION:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/national/health-science/cdc-report-birth-rates-plummet-for-young-women-as-economy-worries-likely-keep-the-stork-away/2011/11/17/gIQA9qwiUN_story.html

MORE CATS -- BUT FEWER PLACES:
http://www.humanesociety.org/issues/pet_overpopulation/facts/pet_ownership_statistics.html

November 27, 2011

Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 11/27/11

What Chicago is talking about this week:

In the midst of mourning the passing of Maggie Daley (it's still a tragic loss although it was somewhat expected as the family moved up a planned New Year's Eve wedding so that she could attend a few weeks ago -- our thought and prayers are with the Daley family) ... my 'hood just learned of a sneak attack Walmart Express opening this week!

Another planned store eight blocks away is tied up in protests (not everyone wants the "big box" stores in the neighborhoods) and real estate issues ... but surprise ... surprise ... another one at Broadway and Addison flew under the radar and will be open on Wed 11/30. Which means I can now, by virtue of a 15 minute walk, amble to three different Jewel-Oscos, a Whole Foods, a SuperTarget, a Walmart Express, at least two Walgreens, two CVSs, two Starbucks, and about a half dozen 7-11s.

Now if only this plethora of properties to procure provisions would result in some pricing provocations, I'd be pleased as punch at the proliferation of all of these purchasing places. (Who doesn't like a little alliteration on a rainy Sunday?)

WE'RE NEXT ... HERE'S THE CHICAGO WALMART EXPRESS LIST:
http://www.walmartchicago.com/2011/09/21/wal-mart-opens-first-downtown-chicago-store/

REST IN PEACE MAGGIE DALEY ...:
http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/local/breaking/chi-maggie-daley-dies-20111124,0,1510837.story

SHOP PINK FOR THE HOLIDAYS!:
http://www.bcrfcure.org/part_pinkprod.html

November 26, 2011

Random Soapbox for Saturday 11/26/11

I don't mean to go off on a rave here, but ...

... it is that time of month (because once a month, I'm committed to turning my weekly rant inside out to go on and on about something positive instead) in a month where I've been bombarded with what so many of my Facebook friends and acquaintances and others of a more tenuous connection have been thankful for. So ... the official holiday may have ended a few dozen hours ago, but here's my 2011 list of 10 items for which I'm thankful:

1.) An active dream life. I feel sorry for those who can't remember their dreams -- as I enjoy mine (even the unexplainable ones or the ones that tend toward the Tarantino in scope and scale). Often, I run into those I've lost in my life (even pets -- my pit bull Demon makes regular guest appearances), including my father's father last week, who showed up out of nowhere asking for help in understanding why all of the coins looked so different (pennies and nickels and quarters of designs not around when he was alive). Anyone want to analyze that one?

2.) My health. I'll be just about 40 years in 40 days, so there's always room for improvement. But if a windedness from climbing stairs, eyes ready for the lasik-ing, and persistent heartburn controlled by nightly generic meds cover my biggest maladies, then I'm not doing so bad after all. Anyone want to House that one and tell me otherwise?

3.) This creative outlet. I'm not naive to think that most of what I put on the blog and force down the throats of others on Facebook is ever read by anyone but me. But it gives me something to do, and keeps my mind in a good place, so even if I alone enjoy it, it's done for the right reason. (And if you're along for the ride, I'm thankful for that too!)

4.) Facebook connectedness. I so enjoyed Herman Wouk's Winds of War and its sequel because I felt like I was keeping tabs on multiple characters in all levels of situations over the course of time. Facebook is like that for me -- even better now that it's on my smart phone and I can actually systemically filter through the lives of others. I kind of like learning about others' public selves.

5.) Real-life connectedness. Not that Facebook is the be-all and end-all of all interactions, though. It's still the time spent with family (as broadly defined as I do), with friends out in Chicago, with strangers met during my travels ... and all that happens in my life that I choose to keep private and off of Facebook. After all, that for which I'm most thankful won't even make this list [(c)1998-present].

6.) Chapters of my life. Going through my life from twenty years ago each Friday as I post a Friday flashback, I'm constantly reminded that I've lived "in the moment" all of my life. That sometimes translates to enjoying those that are part of my life for the short time that they are there, or travelling on paths that were unexpected and decidedly more challenging than I could have imagined, but each chapter is enjoyed as it starts and ends.

7.) My quests. There's always something around the corner. Getting to put my feet into each and every Great Lake. Visiting each HardRockCafe that I can. Touring the US, one big city at a time (alphabetically). Viewing every modern day Presidential Library. Always more to do ... another opportunity to create ... always living in forward motion ...

8.) Work I enjoy. I was a professional student for more years than I've been a career person -- but I'll hit my eighth year with my current company (recession willing) this March, and I couldn't be happier with the "fit" that it is for me.

9.) My life as it is. All in all, and as much as it pains me to quote a Gosselin (I'll assume that someone wrote the tag line for them), "It's a crazy life ... but it's [my] life." I'm not one for regrets and I am thankful to be right where I am today.

10.) TV. I am addicted. I already know this. And my addiction has now been enabled by the DVR. And by being able to find some shows that I can watch online. But there could be worse addictions, and I do so try to balance the drivel with some quality documentaries. All in all, it's a relatively harmless hobby to have to overtake your life, right?

Speaking of TV, here's three things I learned from the last episode of Amazing Race (yep, my Amazing Race Aside for the week ...)

1.) "To travel is to live", to be read with great feeling and drama.
2.) 50 million Lego pieces are used to make Legoland (I'm not sure if that includes the thousands that I'm sure little kids might eat "by accident").
3.) The pictorial symbol for "barf bag" is indeed universal.

CHECK SICKSAVER ON THIS LIST (& THEN PAUSE & ASK, "WHY IS THERE THIS LIST?"):
http://www.sicksack.com/g-nonair.htm

ITEM #3 ABOVE:
http://capcognition.blogspot.com/

WHAT THE INTERWEBS SAY ABOUT YOUR DREAMS:
http://www.dreammoods.com/dreamdictionary/p2.htm

Random Posting for Penn State 11/26/11

1.) Question: Can someone hurry up and book Jerry VanDyke (whom I just saw this week on The Middle) to play Jerry Sandusky in the inevitable movie? [Disclaimer: I'm not making light of the abuse scandal ... just stating the obvious. I know there's nothing to laugh about regarding the victims.]

2.) Commentator comment that made me groan: Not the commentator so much as the crowd, but every time they cheer for the Badger player named Toon, I think that they're booing their own team -- kind of like what happens upon occasion at a Pearl Jam concert (I'm thinking of you, organist Boom Gaspar).

3.) Commentator comment that made me giggle: All the talk about Badger Montee Ball, which, every time, sparks the word association in my head of "Let's Make a Deal!" ...

4.) Stat of the day: 1 of 2. As in, if we had just 1 of those 2 TDs we practically gave Wisconsin, we'd have been tied at halftime.

5.) Final thought: I'm just 144 miles away from Madison, so I can attest that it's a miserable dark dismal rainy afternoon -- which may explain why those Badger uniforms seem to be so slippery as we attempt (and fail) to tackle those wearing them -- but turnovers, penalties and interceptions, OH MY!

IT JUST FEELS RIGHT TO ALWAYS INCLUDE THIS LINK:
http://rainn.org/

SEE FIRST LINK FIRST PLEASE ... BUT THEN SEE THIS NEW PARLOR GAME:
http://villanova.rivals.com/showmsg.asp?fid=1159&tid=149758195&mid=149758195&sid=1000&style=2

HAPPY 20th BDAY PJAM:
http://www.pj20.com/countdown/

November 25, 2011

Random Flashback for Friday 11/25/11



It's the holidays.


Time for decorating (my tree goes up next weekend).


Time for the music (that started already on the way back from Indiana yesterday).


Time for the family photo ops -- like this one of my sister Bonnie's family (another family member with whom I've reconnected thanks to the workings of the Facebook) some twenty years ago (it nicely bookends the one posted last December --12/17/10 -- although in that one, it was the older Ryan who seemed a little too excited to be photographed and this year, it's the younger Tyler). Of course the shot is still sans youngest family member Kristin, who was added to this family's portraits a few years later ...


Finally, it's time for a shout-out to nephews Ryan (Hey!) and Tyler (What up!) ...

November 24, 2011

Random Thought for Thursday 11/24/11

Curious at all about the science behind the breeding of the turkey you ate today? (Or, at least, the majority of you, as studies show that the US leads the world in per person turkey consumption, and as 31% of that turkey is eaten around the holidays ...) Take a look at these facts from a recent turkey science article I came across:

Turkey growers have specifically bred turkeys to the demands of the consumer, taking the giant turkeys of pre-World-War-I and slimming them down to fit in the smaller ovens of the smaller families in the 30's. And those bronze feathered turkeys seen so frequently in the first Thanksgiving images were jettisoned in favor of the white feathered ones since the purchaser wasn't fond of pigment splotches that would be left over on the meat.

Then came the 60's and the demand for more white meat -- which led to Tom Turkeys with 62% of their usable meat on the breast. And my favorite factoid, this breeding characteristic was such a dramatic change, that the Toms can no longer breed naturally -- "They're anatomically such that you can't get things to match up!", says the gentleman quoted in the article below. Which, in turn, led to another scientific development -- the Poultry Semen Extender, a solution that allows 1 male to get to 20-30 females, artificially.

By all means -- I hope you enjoyed your meal (I know I did mine -- it didn't top the bacon turkey of a few years back, but this year's rosemary lemon style was sure tasty). But maybe, next year, a little more sympathy for the genetically altered beast on your table who has never experienced the joy of mating might just be in order ...

Oh yeah ... Happy Thanksgiving!

MY FAVORITE HOLIDAY READING IN QUITE SOME TIME:
http://www.usatoday.com/tech/science/2010-11-24-turkeytalk24_ST_N.htm

A SLIGHTLY ANGRIER TAKE ON THE STATE OF THE MODERN TURKEY:
http://motherboard.tv/2011/11/23/despite-their-giant-breasts-messed-up-modern-turkeys-can-t-mate

THE PRESIDENTIAL PARDON OF THE TURKEY THROUGH THE YEARS:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/arts-post/post/thanksgiving-turkey-pardon-5-theatrical-moments-for-presidential-birds/2011/11/23/gIQAhgHXoN_blog.html

November 23, 2011

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 11/23/11

Indiana Ho!

Used in an extra long sentence overburdened with unnecessary parenthetical: "That's not a person from Indiana of loose morals (although I was in Indy this past fall and can attest that they exist), nor is it a special implement for farming only used by Hoosiers (although it wouldn't surprise me if the content from the last set of parentheses couldn't just be repeated here) -- but it is the exhortation I'm about to proclaim in a few moments after loading up the car (a la Westward Ho!) and beginning my trip towards a family celebration in and around South Bend: Indiana Ho!"

A Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours!

HOOSIER PIE, AS FEATURED ON FOOD FLOOZIE:
http://foodfloozie.blogspot.com/2011/10/indiana-cream-pie-for-purdue-game.html

CONTRACTORS IN INDIANA THAT DEAL WITH HOOSIER HOES:
http://www.findcontractor.org/farm-equipment-state/IN-farm-equipment.htm

WESTWARD HO IS QUITE THE INNOCENT CONCEPT:
http://teacher.scholastic.com/products/instructor/westwardho.htm

November 22, 2011

Random Tune for Tuesday 11/22/11

Her latest album ELEVEN has been playing in the car CD player non-stop since being released on Oct 11, 2011, and since I think you can never get enough Martina, here's her "seasonal" song (more Halloween, I realize) that I think still carries a powerful message for Thursday's holiday (particularly for those of you've who've been wounded, jaded, wonderin', searchin', readin', writin', prayin', fightin' and who, like me, just sometimes need a perspective adjustment):

I've been searchin', wonderin', thinkin', lost and lookin' all my life.
I've been wounded, jaded, loved and hated,
I've wrestled wrong and right...

I've been readin', writin', prayin', fightin' --
I guess I would be still ...

YEAH, THAT WAS UNTIL ... I MET GOD's WILL:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YCRrrP0EhPc&ob=av2e

November 21, 2011

Random Memorial for Monday 11/21/11

Gone but not forgotten: my "shadow blog".

FB, which is run by the subset of our generation that fully embraces its adult ADHD diagnoses, has announced that it will no longer automatically import blog posts to one's notes section.

Since I started this side project/creative outlet years ago (time sure does fly when you have a daily posting regimen), my nephew had this option turned on to automatically take the full blog post (which almost always includes random links to the interwebs as a bonus content feature to the randomness of the day) and to send it to Facebook notes as a different way to view that which was on my mind. It was kind of like I was getting multiple bites at the blog apple, if you will.

That which once was standard in my little bloggy world, you will be missed.

BECAUSE AUTOMATION ISN'T PERSONAL, SAYS ONE:
http://sociableboost.com/facebook-no-longer-going-to-import-blog-posts/

BUT REALLY THEY WANT YOU BLOGGING ON FB INSTEAD:
http://www.facebook.com/help/?faq=206051139465982#My-blog-isn't-importing-to-Facebook.

FUN FOR ME ... FEEL FREE TO SNOOP AROUND:
http://capcognition.blogspot.com/

November 20, 2011

Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 11/20/11

What Chicago is talking about this week:

It's ward redistricting time.

Which in and of itself is a standard political process to adjust for population changes.

But in Chicago -- it's a racially tinged conversation pitting groups against each other in an attempt to wield aldermanic power. With the burden of being one of the top three segregated cities as of a 2011 report (trailing NYC and Milwaukee), we're now in the midst of fighting over how to redraw maps that account for a loss of 181,000 African Americans in the last 10 years (there are currently 19 predominantly African American wards) and a growth of 25,000 Hispanics (who now have 10 predominantly Latino wards and suggest that they should have closer to 14). The map is due December 1st ... so an unhappy Thanksgiving is ahead for all of those with "skin in the game" -- skin of any color.

For a purportedly race-blind take on the issue, see the Pro Bono Thinking Society's suggested solution (that's a foundation that offers free thinking to those in need -- I kid you not -- that's my new dream job)!

FREE THINKING FOR THOSE IN NEED:
http://www.probonothinking.org/new-wards-of-chicago/

THE BURDEN WE BEAR IN THIS CITY:
http://legallysociable.com/2011/04/04/chicago-named-3rd-most-segregated-city-in-the-country/

DRAMA DUE THIS DECEMBER:
http://timeoutchicago.com/things-to-do/this-week-in-chicago/15023005/chicago-ward-remap-drama

November 19, 2011

Random Soapbox for Saturday 11/19/11

I don't mean to go off on a rant here, but ...

... I need the assistance of my friends who are actors or play some other role in the entertainment world, as I've noticed a disturbing trend on both the small and big screens that I'd like to see reversed.

If you are interacting with a coffee cup as a prop -- particularly one that is in a to-go container, -- could you please do me a favor and "act" like there's a hot liquid in said prop? I'm not saying you have to get all method and create a sense memory and go burn your privates like that poor old lady did at McDonalds (well I guess she was once poor, but I'm pretty sure she's a millionaire now), but I also don't want to be taken out of the moment as a viewer when you take what is clearly something that is empty and toss it around negligently in the scene.

Maybe it's obvious, but I feel like it needed to be said. If I had more time and money on my hands, I'd consider making that my raison d'etre.

And speaking of obvious things that need to be said (and having just the right amount of time on my hands), that's also the theme for the first item listed in my Amazing Race Aside for last week's episode. Here are three things I learned from the most recent leg of the journey:

1.) If you are in a race and you notice that everyone else is not around you, it is probably not the best idea to consider that as "down time" and just take a nap instead of trying to figure out what happened. And if you do decide that you've been left behind and just have to wait it out for the next opportunity, and if you're in Amsterdam, I would think that there's more to do outside of the airport (including the purchase of items that might just be a "sleep aid" ... or a "munchie aid", if you get my drift).

2.) Silly boy, it's pronounced /koh-puhn-hey-guhn/ or /koh-puhn-hah-guhn/, but it is most certainly not pronounced /koh-ping-en/.

3.) I never knew that Denmark actually consisted of 450 islands. It always seemed like one land mass on the maps when I was young. Thanks, Phil, for rocking my world view!

PRONUNCIATION GUIDE FOR COPENHAGEN:
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/copenhagen

THE OFFICIAL SITE OF THE PLACE OF 450 ISLANDS:
http://www.denmark.dk/en

WAIT A MINUTE -- THIS IS ACTING 101?!:
http://www.heyheymicky.com/?p=287

Random Posting for Penn State 11/19/11

1.) Question: Why do all referees sound exactly the same -- is it because they all say the same thing into those booming mikes, so the base voice underneath it all doesn't matter?

2.) Commentator comment that made me groan: said after returning from a commercial with shots of the Columbus Zoo playing in the background --> "It was kind of a zoo on that last snap." If you're going to be an announcer, you have to go to segue school -- and, as a side note, you also must never take inspiration from Whoopi Goldberg as she's another regular forced-segue-offender on The View.

3.) Commentator comment that made me giggle: it wasn't exactly what the commentator said, but it was the image of the Chick-Fil-A cows that pop up as the graphic (since they're a sponsor). I don't have the room, but they do make me want to have a cow or two as pets.

4.) Stat of the day: 11. As in the number of years since Adam Taliaferro was injured at the Horseshoe (the Ohio State stadium -- not the stripper bar down the street). Motivational symbolism that the human spirit can survive the darkest days ... for the team, for the institution, and for Jerry's Kids (the Sandusky victims, not the MDA poster children).

5.) Final thought: it may be "treatable", but it won't be easy -- particularly when exacerbated by the stresses of the unfolding scandal. Our thoughts and prayers are with JoePa and his family as he faces this battle at the same time he deals with all things Sanduskian.

ANOTHER BAD SEGUE:
http://www.aoltv.com/2010/12/10/cnn-introduces-bowel-disease-story-with-diarrhea-scene-from-dum/

EAT MOR CHIKIN:
http://www.chick-fil-a.com/Cows/Gallery

AS FEATURED ON THE CHRISTOPHER REEVE WEBSITE:
http://www.christopherreeve.org/site/c.ddJFKRNoFiG/b.4466179/k.3ED8/Continuously_Raising_the_Bar__Adam_Taliaferro.htm

November 18, 2011

Random Flashback for Friday 11/18/11





Maybe it's being a child of divorce (a few times over) -- or maybe it's the rules for fair coverage of political candidates this time of year, but I feel like I have to give equal time to both sides of the family tree.


Since I spoke earlier this week about my biological father (by the way, his surgery went fine and he is returning to the nursing home tomorrow), I figured it only fair to include this picture today.


This is my biological mother's late partner Skip. And I have to include two disclaimers ...


1) tonight when I pulled this out of my 1991 photo album, I saw on the back of it that it said Christmas 1992, so tonight's memory may only be 19 years old instead of twenty ... and ...


2) that same notation said that the significance of this jar o honey was to remind Skip of his brush with death -- a story I don't know, so I'll have to tag someone else in to complete this memory! Holly -- I think you can best fill in the "bee" blanks here, no?

November 17, 2011

Random Thought for Thursday 11/17/11

I know this may come across as contradictory to my stated plans to lose some weight before turning 40 in Florida in a few more weeks (and don't worry, I'm not packing any old man speedos -- but I do so love a wifebeater ... and don't worry about that, as I mean the undershirt and not the Drew Peterson/OJ Simpson ilk) ... but if there's anything that's going to accelerate my end game of one day appearing like the blobs in Wall-E, that would be my TV watching schedule on Wednesday nights this season.

I watch the ABC comedies (except for the new Suburgatory -- sorry Sisto, I prefer you dark and brooding), DVR ANTM (yes, I just said that, I'm a fan of those who can smize), catch the X Factor and Up All Night and Extreme Couponing on demand (how's that for a collection of randomness), flip to Top Chef: Texas (for some Emmy winning competition reality), schedule Work of Art for the weekend (for some exposure to those who are "touched" and express it through odd challenges), bemoan the fact that I have to skip Blue Mountain State this season (I'm just out of room on my storage device!) and end my night with the twisted marvelousness that is American Horror Story (now that's an amusement park attraction just waiting to be made).

I am open to the suggestion that I may have an addiction (but at least it's a well rounded one)!

I DO SO LOVE A MIND MORE TWISTED THAN I:
http://www.fxnetworks.com/shows/originals/ahs/

I DO SO LOVE TO BE ABOVE AVERAGE:
http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m0NAH/is_1_33/ai_95909852/

I DO SO LOVE THAT THE INTERWEBS HAVE A LIST OF CELEBRITY WIFE BEATERS:
http://www.moviezadda.com/world-famous-wife-beaters.html

November 16, 2011

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 11/16/11

Pacemaker Installation or Implantation.

Used in a sentence: "I could tell when I typed it in an email to my family that it seemed like the wrong choice of word -- but I just couldn't decide if it was a Pacemaker Installation or Implantation."

Either way, my biological father is currently out of his usual spot in Lebanon's nursing home and in the Ephrata Community Hospital (via the VA) to have a pacemaker installed (or implanted ... or imbued -- must ... look ... away ... from ... the ... thesaurus ...).

Apparently, it's an easy surgery ... I'm assuming it's also easy for an 88 year old who's had lots of previous cardiac attention ... therefore I'm thinking that all should return to normal soon enough. But for those of you whom I've seen take requests, feel free to say a prayer or send "recovery" thoughts his way.

If only I was finding out this news 48 hours ago, then I could have ended the post with: Ralph's chances of ever riding on a rollercoaster ever again, you will be missed.

I DON'T THINK HE'S EVER BEEN ON THE INTERNET, SO HE'S MISSING THIS:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_th92X3BE5M

IF YOUR HEART CAN'T TAKE IT, SKIP THE COASTERS:
http://www.webmd.com/heart-disease/news/20051116/roller-coasters-safe-for-heart

ROOM 200, BUT DON'T MAKE ANY PRANK CALLS 'CAUSE HE'S SUPER-OLD:
http://www.webmd.com/heart-disease/news/20051116/roller-coasters-safe-for-heart

November 15, 2011

Random Tune for Tuesday 11/15/11

Sometimes the snow comes down in June. Sometimes the sun goes round the moon.

Sometimes you are Miss America and make some bad decisions and take some interesting photos and lose your crown and end up with a music career to show off your amazing voice.

And then sometimes you show up in my eccentric and eclectic cassette collection and sometimes you're chosen to represent the letter 'w' in that ongoing series.

And speaking of sun going round the moon, sometimes (like today, 11/15) it's exactly 400 days until the end of the Mayan calendar, so sometimes you might need encouragement to go find the "best" that was being saved for "the last" just in case our collective times are running out! (Isn't this world a crazy place?)

And this "Save the Best for Last" is not the Adele version (she wasn't even born twenty years ago when I was collecting cassettes, was she?) ... but the one from Vanessa.

W is for WILLIAMS, VANESSA L.:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5EdmHSTwmWY&ob=av3e

November 14, 2011

Random Memorial for Monday 11/14/11

Gone but not forgotten: my favorite toothpicks.

It's not just part of my social uniform (if you see me out, chances are there's a toothpick in my mouth -- and before you crack a joke at my expense about an oral fixation, just know that I've been doing it for years -- and I've finally graduated from erasers to pencils to pens to picks over my lifetime). My affinity to pick my teeth is part of my dental hygiene process, and my new dentist (new as in she took over the office I used to go to and new as in she's just out of dental school and took her NBDEs not that long ago) approves. (She also told me how bad she was at flossing in an ill-fated attempt to establish rapport and tried to match the color of my last filling to the natural discoloration that was going on in my mouth, so maybe it's time to find a veteran dentist.)

But now that my brand is no longer made (Dolly supplied the last box from the Walmart a few months ago), I'm stuck with some approximation of a sturdy plastic toothpick with a tickler on the end of it that doesn't hold up to the rigor of my cleaning activities.

[Although it's still better than the wooden toothpicks, which used to splinter in a way that I then needed another toothpick to pick the toothpick out of my teeth.]

Plastic implement that used to satisfy me, you are sorely missed.

AND DON'T GET ME STARTED ON THE "THROWPICKS":
http://www.garyspeer.com/800/when-does-a-toothpick-become-a-throwpick/

THESE JUST AREN'T GOOD ENOUGH:
http://www.walmart.com/ip/The-Doctor-S-Interdental-Toothpicks-Brushpicks-250-CT/10997207

WHAT OTHERS DO WITH TOOTHPICKS (more power to them):
http://www.thisiscolossal.com/2011/04/one-man-100000-toothpicks-and-35-years-scott-weavers-rolling-through-the-bay/