Random Soapbox for Saturday 4/30/11

I don't mean to go off on a rant here, but ...

... and I should probably start with a disclaimer in triplicate: 1) I did live on campus during most of my six and a half-years or so of undergrad studies (I really didn't want to leave) so I can relate to that lifestyle ... 2) I have also been inebriated before at 2 or 3 am ... 3) I really like lasagna and miss it now that my food choices went a touch toward the heart-healthier in 2011 ...

... BUT that doesn't excuse the Doug Neidermyer-esque behavior of Alex Engle, a fraternity boy who refused to leave his house during a fire alarm on campus at Western Illinois University this winter (I sometimes get my news a few months late). And the worst part, when found eating his lasagna, he slurredly said something to the effect of "my parents got money and you took too long and I love lasagna".

The only twist to this story that would have made it sweeter for me is if he had been lovingly slobbering over post-closing-time Chinese food -- because then they could have had a field day with the headlines, re-imagining the concept of a Chinese Fire Drill.

Alex -- next time ... please "stumble away from the lasagna, and save yourself instead!"

IT WASN'T EXACTLY SOPHIE's CHOICE:

http://www.mcdonoughvoice.com/news/x1254723513/Student-chooses-lasagna-over-fire-alarm

WHERE IS DOUG NEIDERMYER NOW?:

http://www.acmewebpages.com/animal/wherenow.htm

THE INTERWEB'S VERSION OF WHERE CHINESE FIRE DRILL COMES FROM:

http://www.todayifoundout.com/index.php/2010/09/origin-of-the-chinese-fire-drill/

Random Flashback for Friday 4/29/11

I'm sure somebody somewhere is still eating their Easter candy and/or living off of the sugar high from last weekend ... So here's a shot of the annual egg hunt that my Aunt Bea (my mother's sister) used to run each holiday -- from twenty years ago in 1991, as is my shtick.

And by the looks on these faces, I'm thinking a countdown was underway or else the rules were being reviewed before the young'uns were released for the hunt ...

On a sadder note, an aunt of mine from the other side of the family (my father's sister) passed away this week. My thoughts are with her children and grandchildren --rest in peace, Aunt Evelyn.

Random Thought for Thursday 4/28/11

Dearest Royals:

I know security is tight.

I'm sure you've checked and double checked and triple checked the venues and the guest lists.

However, could you do me a solid and review it one more time. I would recommend that you remove anyone from Moldavia or from the Moroni crime family (just 'cause of their past bad behaviour). [And if you don't get this reference, then you've never truly Dynasty'd or Days'd.]

Toodles, tea and krumpets (or whatever y'all say) ...

Troy

P.S. If you are attending the shindig (whether in person or parked in front of the telly), and you're concerned about having to stand forever without a potty break (or is that a loo break?), then may I offer you the Lichtenstein fondue (yep, it's my weekly Amazing Race Aside -- and that was a whole pot of plumbing-clogging cheese that the teams had to eat! Miss you already, cowboys ...).

P.P.S. I could be open to the fact that I watch a little too much TV.

SOMEONE WITH TOO MUCH TIME ON HIS or HER HANDS:

http://www.ultimatedynasty.net/statistics.html

NO NO ... SOMEONE ELSE WITH TOO TOO MUCH TIME ON HIS or HER HANDS:

http://hourglass.weebly.com/

HERE's A MORE RESPECTABLE OBSESSION:

http://cliqueclack.com/tv/2011/04/25/amazing-race-not-fond-of-fondue/

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 4/27/11

TV Strikes Back.

Used in a sentence: "It used to be easy in that the message was loud and clear -- "Parents, TV is bad for your Kids" -- but now a subtle campaign is underway as TV strikes back -- "Kids, Parents are bad for you, says the TV".

Exhibit A: Witness that horrible commercial for whooping cough that seems to be messaging that being held by your parent is tantamount to a death trap.

Exhibit B: Witness those omnipresent ads for Temptations Desserts that frighten children with tales of the Choco-beast, etc. so that the old folks can keep their kids' hands out of their sweets.

It was only a matter of time before TV took a more aggressive stance as it marches toward its ultimate destination -- to take over the rearing of our young-uns.

HERE's AN ONLINE COMPLAINT MECHANISM (AND PROOF THAT I AM NOT ALONE):

http://www.complaintnow.com/complaints/board/print/449

PEOPLE ON THE INTERWEBS SHOULD LIKE TO COMPLAIN ALOT:

http://community.discovery.com/eve/forums/a/tpc/f/7841975849/m/63619499501

STRONGER FAMILIES WANTS YOU TO TURN THE TV OFF:

http://www.strongerfamilies.org/can-television-replace-parents/

Random Tune for Tuesday 4/26/11

You never know when you're going to just run around the corner, so to speak, and run smack dab into a song from your past that you hadn't heard in years (because maybe you only had it in on cassette and that cassette broke, and Columbia House never had it as a CD, and then Columbia House got bought out by BMG, and then they closed, and now it just is so much harder to add to your CD collection, and you've never graduated to online music purchases or drank the i-kool-aid -- anyway, you know, hypothetically).

As of this past holiday weekend when I got caught up on my TV watching on the old DVR/OnDemand, the "corner" was the episode of "The Office" when Michael Scott's "movie" was screened in the workplace, and the song was this one below ... which captures the manic side of Billy Joel and his big city livin' (upon retrospection, is this a prequel of sorts to that celebration of psychological mania -- his "Go To Extremes"?).

A COSMOPOLITAN SOPHISTICATE OF CULTURE AND INTELLIGENCE:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7MfOwJLlg8M

Random Memorial for Monday 4/25/11

Gone but not forgotten: our time as Gotham City.

Oh so sad ... for someone like me who's followed Batman from the campy TV show to the latest reboot of a reboot ... who's enjoyed Jokers from Cesar Romero to Jack Nicholson to Heath Ledger ... who drove around Chicago's lower Wacker Drive recognizing recent film scenes. And, now news that the 2012 Batman will NOT be filmed in Chicago.

Irrespective of the supposed consolation prize of being designated as Metropolis for the next Superman reboot (is it soon time to 'retire' that 'reboot' word?), the equation Gotham = Chicago as an accurate statement, you will be missed.

GOTHAM = STEEL CITY:

http://www.wtae.com/r/26867518/detail.html

MAKE YOUR OWN BAT-TOUR WITH THIS INTERACTIVE MAP:

http://www.chicagotribune.com/entertainment/chi-dark-knight-location-map,0,3631449.mapmashup

OUR FAN BOY CONSOLATION PRIZE:

http://www.chicagonow.com/blogs/stump-the-tromp/2011/03/superman-man-of-steel-to-film-in-chicago-this-summer.html

Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 4/24/11

[Since Holy Week is ending today, it seems fitting to be a final day for my Holy Hell Week of posts. Thanks for playing along!]

HOLY (-ier post):

What Chicago is talking about this week:

Well -- at least those that identify as Christians (or lapsed Christians for those who just make it to church once or twice a year) -- they are talking about and potentially singing some old fashioned hymns like "Up from the Grave He Arose!" and "Christ the Lord is Risen Today (A-a-a-a-le-e-lu-u-ia)".

*************************************************************************************

HELL (-ish post):

What Chicago is talking about this week:

After the Burr Oak cemetery scandal last year (people were buried on top of each other or "lost" in unmarked graves and stored in sheds on the property), legislators passed laws to tighten up the restrictions at private sites -- requiring a database of graves and background checks for graveyard employees. Except, now that time has passed, it turns out those same legislators have determined that those additional requirements would be too expensive, so new legislation has been introduced to "soften" those extra rules.

To which I say -- it might have been a much different gospel story had Jesus been buried at Burr Oak (or, [warning: possible sacrilege ahead (avert your eyes if you are so inclined)] maybe that's what actually happened at that Garden tomb near Calvary so long ago)!

*************************************************************************************

I MUST BE LAPSED, AS I ONLY RECALLED TWO OF THESE:

http://www.hymnsite.com/lection/

WE MUST CHANGE THINGS! (JUST NOT TOO MUCH!!):

http://www.chicagobreakingnews.com/news/local/chibrknews-ill-lawmakers-consider-softening-cemetery-law-20110423,0,7884366.story

PROOF THAT YOU MUST BE CAREFUL WHEN YOU GOOGLE SEARCH:

http://www.baseball-reference.com/players/e/eastelu01.shtml

Random Soapbox for Saturday 4/23/11

[Holy Hell Week resumes ... for two more days of doubling up on the posts so you can pick the one that suits your mood. And on a Saturday, that means a rant and a rave!]

HOLY (-ier post):

I don't mean to go off on a rave here, but ...

... what a holiday weekend we got going on. Bookended by Earth Day and Easter, there's also today's celebration of William Shakespeare's birth. Our governor in Illinois even declared today "talk like Shakespeare day", so why not just quote him directly (from Love's Labour Lost):

"He draweth out the thread of his verbosity finer than the staple of his argument."

If I ever need to change the whole concept of my Capricious Cognition thing, this might just fit!

*************************************************************************************

HELL (-ish post):

I don't mean to go off on a rant here, but ...

... what a difference a year makes. Last year at this time, "frat house on the hill" was what they were calling Congressman Eric Massa's office environment where he preyed on his young male interns, forcing them to live with him in DC. [Read up on it -- it's a great modern twist to the sexual harassment debate.]

Now, "frat house on the hill" is the attack cry against those congressfolk who are choosing to save personal funds by living in their offices. And it apparently is across the aisles (it's not just a Red or a Blue or a Black* thing), with critics in an uproar stating that their offices aren't meant to be lived in and that you shouldn't run to represent the people if you can't afford a place in Washington. And some go so far as to say that they should have to pay taxes on the imputed benefit for lodging.

You know what -- if a representative wants to sleep on a couch and shower at the gym in order to be thrifty, I say "more power to him or her"! And you know what else -- that same representative can really impress me once he or she applies that same level of thriftiness to our current financial morass. (Eric Massa -- insert "more ass" joke here.)

[*By the way, what is the color to associate with the Tea Partiers? Black goes with Tea but from what I've seen on TV, that color makes them see red! And since red is the color for anger, maybe they should co-opt Red from the Republicans (like they're trying to take over the party itself.) And then Republicans could affiliate with the color Grey (like an elephant -- or like the increasingly higher average age of its active members.) Or to keep this all flag-friendly, maybe the Tea Party could represent the color White (or is that just all kind of redundant, if you know what I mean).]

*************************************************************************************

FUNNY ENVIRONMENTAL QUOTES FOR EARTH DAY:

http://www.grinningplanet.com/environmental-quotes/funny-environmental-quotes.htm

FRAT HOUSE ON THE HILL as popular in 2010:

http://thehill.com/blogs/blog-briefing-room/news/91899-massas-frat-house-office

FRAT HOUSE ON THE HILL as popular in 2011:

http://www.politico.com/click/stories/1102/crew_dings_frat_house_hill_offices.html

Random Flashback for Friday 4/22/11

Look -- I'm taking a break from my Holy Hell Theme Week.

I guess it's just that I don't have a Hell-ish flashback from the spring of 1991. [Of course, if I was working with a different year -- then maybe ...]

Instead, here's someone dressed up in all her Easter finery from twenty years ago (my niece Ashlyn). To my non-Jewish, non-Muslim, non-Agnostic, non-Wiccan friends, have a Happy Easter.

(And to those Jews, Muslims, Agnostics and Wiccans, I hope you have a great weekend too! Feel free to dress up in finery for your own reasons too if you'd like!!)

Random Thought for Thursday 4/21/11

HOLY (-ier post) & HELL (-ish post).

So my concept for a theme week actually converges tonight. Not because I'm running behind and need to get caught up. Not because I'm tired of writing myself into a corner. But because it turns out that I may have figured out an answer that has vexed many in the religion in which I was brought up. I know not everyone has a heaven and a hell in their upbringing, but for those of us who do -- I think I may have stumbled on their existence.

It's been reported that astronomers have found two gigantic bubbles of energy bracketing our galaxy -- each 25,000 light years from the center of the galaxy's top and bottom. Each bubble has the energy equivalent of 100,000 supernova explosions. Don't look now -- but I think that's the location of heaven and hell. Should I tell anyone -- I mean besides my FB friends and anyone who has stumbled on this blog post?

I'M NOT MAKING IT UP -- IT's IN THE FREAKIN' NEW YORK TIMES:

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/11/10/science/space/10galaxy.html

HERE's A TOPIC FOR DEBATE (I GUESS): IS JUDAS IN HEAVEN OR HELL:

http://religion.blogs.cnn.com/2011/04/21/my-take-is-judas-in-heaven-or-hell-god-only-knows/comment-page-46/

ALSO, BETELGEUSE IS GOING TO EXPLODE SOON!:

http://www.ibtimes.com/articles/104348/20110124/betelgeuse-supernova-could-rival-moon-give-scientists-inside-look.htm

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 4/20/11

[Two late nights at work in a row means I'm posting a little late ... I picked the wrong time to double up on my obligations during Holy Hell week, no?]

HOLY (-ier post)

Amazing Race Word Association (Aside)

Used in a sentence: "After last week's episode, a little Amazing Race Word Association (my Aside for this week) seems in order: Austria ... Schwarzenegger ... California ... therapy ... Freud ... couch ... chimney sweep ... chimchimanee, chimchimanee, chimchimchiree ... Van Dyke ... Julie Andrews ... von trapp ... Sound of Music ... Happy Easter (because that was the traditional holiday movie back in the days when there were so few channels)!

*************************************************************************************

HELL (-ish post)

Gaborish

Used in a sentence: "Those guys make a mockery of marriage -- their behavior is just Gaborish."

It's not a competition, and the heart wants what it wants, but with 18 divorces so far among the Gabor sisters, something does seem a little sibling-rivalry-gone-amuck-ish. Not that I can't personally relate (hey -- not throwing any judgment around as it's made my life rather interesting) -- I'm thinking Gaborish might be in my genes (and maybe it skips a generation)?

*************************************************************************************

WERE THE VON TRAPPS ACTUALLY IN THE SOUND OF MUSIC?:

http://www.eeggs.com/items/17781.html

OF COURSE THERE IS A CHIMNEY SWEEP COMPANY WITH THIS NAME:

http://www.chim-chiminee.com/

SIBLING RIVALRY IN THE EXTREME: TWO SISTERS MARRIED THE SAME GUY:

http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001248/bio

Random Tune for Tuesday 4/19/11

[Sometimes I practically write myself into a corner ... here's a second entry in my new theme of Holy Hell Week that also advances to the next letter of my ongoing series AtoZ Musical Eccentricities: The Cassette Years. Let's see how I get out of this one!]

HOLY (-ier post)

Let's take it to church (and "Happy Passover!" -- or does one say "Congratulations on getting Passed Over!" -- to those celebrating?) -- with a little something from a soundtrack (I filed that cassette under H years ago since either her or her mom sang all the songs on it) that is in my collection. 'Tis the season ...

H IS FOR HOUSTON, WHITNEY and CISSY:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ev5_qIoeDrw&feature=related

*************************************************************************************

HELL (-ish post)

Good old Don Henley can channel his bitter observations about the world around him like no one else. So why not highlight this song featuring the "devil [getting] downhearted ... 'cause there's nothing left for him to claim" in our modern world. Although -- note the video on youtube is not the one with Don (he can also channel his legal rights like few others, so those have been yanked) but instead a performance from the Quaker version of the Glee kids performing at music camp. [And the fact that the Quakers are rocking out to this tune just makes it all the more random.]

UNLESS THAT H IS FOR HENLEY, DON:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=73Pjm1Eb3uQ

Random Memorial for Monday 4/18/11

[It's been awhile, so why not another theme week (?) -- welcome to "Holy Hell Week"! Here's how it will work: depending on how you feel, you pick the post that best fits your mood.]

*************************************************************************************

HOLY (-ier post)

Gone but not forgotten: Easter as a rotating holiday.

Announced today, the "mystery" of the Last Supper was solved. Of course, until I saw the headline, I didn't know that Matthew, Mark and Luke contradicted John as to the date of that last meal -- but hey, I'm no biblical scholar. Apparently, with this solution, Easter can now be celebrated every year on April 5.

Assuming this gets accepted by those in authority (are you listening, Pope?) and takes off ...snowy egg hunts, you will be missed.

*************************************************************************************

HELL (-ish post)

Gone but not forgotten: adult only time at the Marriott.

In case you haven't heard, the Marriott chain has "killed" the adult only pay-per-view options from its in house entertainment systems. And, apparently, it's not for any noble reason -- it's just that in modern times, people that are so inclined pack their porn with them on their laptop or iPad. As they prepare to announce their first quarter earnings, they've already provided this guidance -- "growth has been [less] than expected". I have a feeling that many of your older creepier non-technology-oriented male customers might be, ahem ... saying the same thing.

Exclaiming at the front desk the morning after, "but I hit that button on the remote by mistake" ... you will be missed.

*************************************************************************************

I LOVE WHEN THEY SOLVE MYSTERIES THAT I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW ABOUT:

http://ohlundonline.blogspot.com/2011/04/mystery-of-lords-last-supper-solved.html

BLAME IT ON THE iPAD WITH ITS iPORN:

http://consumerist.com/2011/01/marriott-bans-porn-from-new-hotels.html

CONSEQUENCE -- A "LACK OF GROWTH":

http://www.foxbusiness.com/industries/2011/03/28/marriott-sees-weaker-expected-demand-north-america/

Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 4/17/11

What Chicago is talking about this week:

Or ... maybe it's better said ... what aren't we talking about this week? Playoffs for the Bulls and the Blackhawks (with strikingly different results) , sick politicians (both literally with Maggie Daley hospitalized and figuratively with Blago Strikes Back to start this week), shootings and slayings and stabbings (oh my!), another Easter week snow-cast, etc. etc. etc. ... so you have to look hard sometimes to find the uplifting stories.

I'll cut through the columns of crap and give you two -- the Glass Slipper foundation is currently providing gently used prom dresses and accoutrements to low income high school girls in need (Cinderella knows no class limitations!) AND Chicago firefighters rescued a family early this morning (could it be one of the last truly noble professions?). Sometimes you have to look harder, but everyday heroes are here all around us!

MAKING DREAMS COME TRUE:

http://www.glassslipperproject.org/you.htm

AND JUST YESTERDAY, THEY SAVED TWO DOGS (ONE WITH CPR):

http://chicago.cbslocal.com/2011/04/15/firefighters-rescue-revive-2-dogs/

GET WELL MAGGIE DALEY:

http://www.wgntv.com/wgntv-maggie-daley-taken-to-hospital-20110416,0,4019630.story

Random Soapbox for Saturday 4/16/11

I don't mean to go off on a rant here, but ...

... I am sick and tired of the constant arguing and disagreement over every single legislative item -- partisanship ran rampant with talking heads slavishly adhering to sound bites beating the drums during the non-stop news cycle leading to uncertain outcomes about our future. By the way, I'm not talking about the national political cycle that is now 2012 focused (and can I just say I fear for Tampa Bay next year as it hosts the seemingly-always-in-need-of-anger-management-Tea-Partiers at its nominating convention). It's the state of Maine that has me peeved at politics.

The Republicans and Democrats are fighting there over what should be the state dessert. Whoopie Pies, say Republicans, are sold all over the state! They are lard-laden "frosting delivery vehicles" say the Democrats, who prefer wild blueberry pies. And, adding to the urgency, my birth state of PA (I have the document to prove it!) is taking exception to all of the claims, stating that its Amish communities invented this item. (And I regularly buy them at Green Dragon or whenever I can return to my Roots -- like I'm planning to on May 31 -- so I vote for the Amish/PA connection.)

Could it be that the Supreme Court will have to get involved? Not since the Revolution has there been a greater threat to our union. When will someone step up with proof that the Amish stole the recipe from the Native Americans, thus rendering this dispute moot? And who's going to be able to see through this dessert distraction to actually take on issues like the deficit, and jobs growth and sustaining the recovery we're kind of experiencing?

I say Whoopie Pies for all! As a matter of fact, you can pay me my tax refund in Whoopie Pies! (Just mix them up a little, please -- as I'm fond of the Oatmeal, and the Pumpkin and the Chocolate with Peanut Butter filling, and that Red Velvet one I got from the Amish in Indiana was a nice treat ...)

[And, for perspective, at least we have the luxury to be in a Whoopie Pie fight, instead of having to rely on Cow Patties for our sustenance. Yep, I'm squeezing in one last overdue Amazing Race Aside, hearkening back to the last episode where beauty queen Mallory wore her traditional manure outfit to play with the water buffalo poop in that week's detour. She stopped long enough to reflect on the boat ride down the Ganges about how poor poor really can be. If we only knew how lucky we all are, all things considered. Kind of makes our disputes a little petty, eh?]

LATE-BREAKING NEWS -- THERE WAS A COMPROMISE!:

http://www.wmtw.com/r/27439399/detail.html

THE SHOT HEARD ROUND THE WORLD REDUX:

http://www.boston.com/news/odd/articles/2011/03/26/maine_outdoes_pa_with_massive_whoopie_pie/

OH IT's GONNA BE INTERESTING ...:

http://www.gopconvention2012.com/

Random Flashback for Friday 4/15/11

This is (choose one of the following)...

... skinny me dressed up as the emcee of Cabaret for Halloween (and my sister Sherry)?

... skinny me during my kabuki phase in college (and my sister Sherry)?

... skinny me before/after performing in a show as Tuppy Cumberland* (and my sister Sherry)?

... skinny me (and my sister Sherry) who came to see me in Pajama Game 20 years ago at LVC?

[Here are some hints ... this pic is from April and not October, I don't dance well at all, I've never done drag (*and the name is the combination of my first pet and the street on which I lived -- or at least both that are most vivid in my mind as my early child backstory I've seen in pics but don't recall so well) and I sure have had weeks on end of Pajama Game flashbacks these past few Fridays.]

P.S. Sherry -- it's way past time for you to join Facebook, so that you too can see pictures from two decades ago. The campaign continues ...

Random Thought for Thursday 4/14/11

It's actually a trio of thoughts influenced by my recent TV watching (boy I watch a lot of TV) ...

1.) I've complained about commercials that cross a line before (cartoon bears focused on bowel movement dinkleberries? animated boogers partying in your nose?), but can I just say exactly the opposite about the current ads for Snickers Peanut Butter Squared? I giggle every time the deep voiced shark says to the new test subject -- "eat both squares please".

2.) Between vacation and the week off for the ACMs, I missed my Amazing Race Aside for two episodes ago -- so can I just say, please pick up the special Indian Snapple, if only for Luke's sake (so sad ... but so happy that he listened to his mother and pushed through).

3.) Once upon a time, I thought that How I Met Your Mother was the new Friends, like 2.5 Men was (so sad again ... to use the past tense) the new Odd Couple, or how Conan was the new Jay Leno until Jay Leno was the new Jay Leno. But now I think HIMYM is simply unique -- and the new Happy Endings on ABC Wednesdays is the new Friends. It's so good to see Elisha Cuthbert again (the best thing from Scrubs' final spin-off-y season -- and yes, she was better than Franco's kid brother), to find out that Casey Wilson can redeem herself from that unsatisfying detour on SNL and to discover that the Wayans kind of funny gets passed down from generation to generation. On top of which, it closes out an evening of incomparable chuckles, laughs and guffaws with The Middle ("middle" repeated in a whisper to my chest), Better With You (with its often poignant relationship commentary), Modern Family (now I wonder -- was I sondheimized in college?) and the rotating extra comedy (sorry Cougar Town -- or whatever title you choose for your return next week).

LOVE IT:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6e0Gsn4khss

LOVE IT, LOVE IT:

http://www.snapple.com/amazing-race/?gclid=CM24l_6hnagCFcfsKgodBGBDHw

LOVE IT, LOVE IT, LOVE IT:

http://abc.go.com/shows/happy-endings

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 4/13/11

The Long War.

Used in a sentence: "I hate it when I miss out on a major announcement [like when Pluto gets downgraded or it's announced that the world now has five oceans instead of four (and how embarrassing that I learned that decade old news on an episode of Kate Plus 8 -- thanks for introducing me to the Southern Ocean)] -- and how did I miss this in 2006 when it was decided that we should refer to the bundle of military activities that are starting to sound more and more like this generation's crusades as 'The Long War'".

Of course, I would have rather that it all have ended when The Cold War thawed in my youth, and it turns out that Rumsfield's decision to use this phrasing isn't new. (Historically, it's also referred to when the Hapsburgs battled the Ottomans and it's some other academic's suggestion to describe all of the wars of the 20th century.)

As all of these conflagrations has no end in sight, I guess it is all aptly named.

A SLIDESHOW THAT's BEEN DECLASSIFIED?:

http://proceedings.ndia.org/6100/miller.pdf

FROM THIS AGENCY, A LOBBYIST GROUP (WITH THE POTENTIAL FOR BIAS IN THE ABOVE:

http://www.ndia.org/AboutUs/Pages/HistoryofNDIA.aspx

IT WAS ANNOUNCED IN 2006 -- NOTHING LIKE 5 YEAR OLD NEWS!:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2006/feb/15/politics.usa1

Random Tune for Tuesday 4/12/11

I've heard it so many times before -- and I probably heard it first on an old Cher album/cassette/CD [choose your generational point-of-reference poison]. But I heard it most recently at the close of a recent Mr. Sunshine episode (tangent -- Andrea Anders, are you letting the boys from Friends just pass you around? first Joey, now Mr. Sunshine?) as a duet between Allison Janney and James Taylor. A quick glance at the old Wiki showed "famous" covers of it from nearly half a hundred artists ... so I'll break from normal protocol and list multiple youtube versions (again, choose your own musical miasma ...)

THE PRE-CRACKED WHITNEY HOUSTON WELCOMES HOME THE TROOPS WITH IT:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t_UnGxm3OPs&feature=related

THE HALF-BRED VERSION (WARNING -- YOU MAY SEE A BELLY BUTTON!):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HIY0SyyLJ_U

MR. SUNSHINE (WATCH IT SOON BEFORE THEY TAKE THIS AWAY FOR COPYRIGHT):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EXoM223iDWE

THE URBAN VERSION (DMX and BIZZY BONE!):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ydKro5EhIE

YAMIN SINGS IT ON AMERICAN IDOL 5 SEASONS AGO:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OnMtSmKC5Yk

Random Memorial for Monday 4/11/11

Gone but not forgotten: South Bend, Indiana.

I could be slightly ahead of things, but Newsweek did recently rank it number 8 among 10 cities that were "dying". Between 2000 and 2010, it lost 6.1% (which isn't as bad as Detroit), and although the state experienced some growth during that time frame, it's still 82% non-Hispanic white (and statistics show that they don't propagate as rapidly as others in these modern times). I've been to South Bend, and it doesn't seem too bad (they have a hospital and are close enough to Notre Dame for some seasonal excitement), although there was a very strange bar that I went to that seemed a little desperate (and I've been desperate in strange bars before, so I know of what I speak).

What will come of Aunt Shirly's homestead, other than it becoming a place that will be missed?

BLAME THE STUDEBAKER:

http://www.newsweek.com/2011/01/21/america-s-dying-cities/south-bend-indiana.html

AND THE LOCAL RESPONSE:
http://www.wndu.com/hometop/headlines/Mayor__114514474.html

ALL KINDS OF INDIANA NUMBERS (LIKE 19% HAVE A BACHELOR's DEGREE or HIGHER):

http://quickfacts.census.gov/qfd/states/18000.html

Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 4/10/11

What Chicago is talking about this week:

How 'bout those temperatures today -- steadily climbing toward a forecast high of 87? It hasn't been this warm here since September! And anything above 80 triggers the "let's go to the Lake Michigan beach" response for me. Only problem -- the beaches aren't officially open for a few more weeks and I don't think anyone monitors Evanston's fecal matter in the off season to make sure it goes out into the lake and not down the coast to the beaches I've been known to frequent. Maybe I'll just open the windows instead of taking a dip in the lake after all!

THE OTHER SHOE MAY DROP -- STORMS FORECAST FOR TONIGHT:

http://blog.chicagoweathercenter.com/

THEY DON'T OPEN UNTIL MEMORIAL DAY!:

http://www.chicagoparkdistrict.com/resources/beaches/

A LITTLE E COLI LEADS TO A LITTLE RASH AND NAUSEA AND VOMITING:

http://www.mlive.com/news/grand-rapids/index.ssf/2010/08/high_e_coli_levels_reported_al.html

Random Soapbox for Saturday 4/9/11

I don't mean to go off on a rant here, but ...

... let me first say that I can thankfully scrap my diatribe about our almost-shutdown (it would have been #18 in our history, I believe) after simply repeating what I've said before -- compromise and consensus building is demonstrative of leadership in my opinion.

And, having said that, then let me mention how frustrated I am with Jennifer Hudson. All in all -- she has a powerful story and has overcome obstacles that no one should have to face -- but must the chorus of her new song really be a repetition of "where you at?" multiple times? I tried to sing along and change the refrain to "where are you?" and I think it worked just fine. I guess "where you at?" sounds a little angrier than the more winsome and pensive "where are you?" -- which was probably R Kelly's point (he produced it between exploring his sexuality as it relates to water sports and underage girls) -- but must we give up on grammar like this?

I'm flashing back to the problem I had with Fergie a few years back when "a child misses their blanket" should have been when "children miss their blankets" or "a child misses his or her blanket". I ended up banning that song from the car radio and I feel the same may happen to J Hud soon.

Or maybe it could be that I'm just too old and unhip!

WHERE YOU AT? WHERE YOU AT? WHERE YOU AT?:

http://www.chicagonow.com/blogs/gowhere-hip-hop/2011/01/jennifer-hudson-where-you-at-prod-r-kelly-leads-new-videos.html

THERE REALLY IS A FACEBOOK PAGE FOR EVERYTHING:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Im-gonna-miss-you-Like-a-chiLd-misses-their-bLanket/294303194541

NO, NO -- NOW THERE REALLY IS A FACEBOOK PAGE FOR EVERYTHING:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/I-Mentally-Correct-Ungrammatical-Song-Lyrics/118133554878518

Random Flashback for Friday 4/8/11

Scandaloso!

Actually, it was more in a Doris Day/Rock Hudson demure kind of way in how those old fashioned movies used to have to get away with implying things more than showing it all.

So a finale/curtain call to LVC's Pajama Game in 1991 (could it be that I'm finally done with pics from this show?) included this "couple" sharing a single pair of pajamas.

And can I just say -- I have to think I'm like 100 pounds heavier than I was 20 years ago. Assuming that same rate of growth (5 lbs a year?), I'll be 370 by the time I retire (assuming people from my generation will actually be allowed to retire -- government shutdown anyone?)!

[By the way -- what is that shadow at the bottom of the picture? Someone's hat or was Cindy Lou Who in the audience that night?]

Random Thought for Thursday 4/7/11

Facebook -- it really is everywhere!!

So here is one more in the Facebook Ubiquitousness series, and this one is to be retro-paired with the post from 3/10/11 that mentioned how it (FB) was railed against from a NJ pulpit for destroying marriages. In the spirit of being fair and balanced (literally -- not in some Murdochian way served up with a double dose of irony), some pastors are actually embracing the digital mediums to reach the younger generation.

One interesting twist, a quote pulled from the article in the first link below -- "Social networking tends to have a democratizing influence [in that] everyone gets a say, and that's not usually how religion works."

What if Christ announces his return through a twitterfeed? Are you a follower??

PROFESSOR DELL DeCHANT CREDITED WITH THE ABOVE QUOTED COMMENT:

http://www.usatoday.com/news/religion/2010-12-17-facebookfaith17_ST_N.htm

THE FEATURE FROM MY 3/10/11 POST:

http://content.usatoday.com/communities/ondeadline/post/2010/11/anti-facebook-pastor-taking-time-off-/1

JUDGE FOR YOURSELF -- MURDOCH ADMITS TO MANIPULATING THE NEWS:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0K2pLo8JV5Y

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 4/6/11

Parkour on G4.

Used in a sentence: "I have discovered too late in life what would have been my passion if I had been any kind of athletic in high school -- courtesy of an eight episode series featuring Parkour on G4."

I remember when I first saw this sport of free-running (in a Madonna video of all places) and I just stopped in my tracks mesmerized by the guys moving constantly and flying through the air over and around obstacles (and, by the way they moved, "obstacles" was no longer able to be the word used to describe the things in their path).

Now that I've seen the tournament (called Jump City:Seattle), I think it to be a touch of diving without the water, a dash of gymnastics without the uniforms, a dose of fearlessness and preparedness for an occasional broken bone, a dollop of break-dancing, a smidge of oneupsmanship and an inspiration of striving to just take flight -- with a lot of inside language and names for moves that go over my head.

Alas and alack, I'm no longer anything close to fit. And even when I had a fighting chance, I wasn't really anything close to fit then either (my Presidential fitness scores dragged down my academic performance) and so my choices for high school gym electives leaned toward the golf and the archery (because, at least there if I was bad, I only made myself look the fool and didn't hurt a team). Who knows, if they could have covered the insurance and offered it, maybe I would have chosen to be a student of the parkour?!

JUMP CITY SEATTLE ON G4:

http://www.g4tv.com/jumpcity

MADONNA's JUMP VIDEO ON YOUTUBE:

http://www.g4tv.com/jumpcity

"ALL THE BEST" PARKOUR VIDEOS:

http://parkour-videos.com/videos/blane/

Random Tune for Tuesday 4/5/11

Looking through the cassettes for today's post, I decided to settle on an album from Phil and Mike (and the other Mechanics?) from 1991 for the next in my alphabetical series of AtoZ Musical Eccentricities (the cassette years). In particular, the first song on that album's playlist always hit home for me, as it is about a boy who leaves his childhood behind a little early when he runs away. That being said, don't read too much into my connection to it though, as the scenario in the lyrics doesn't quite fit my past -- except for the first two stanzas which are spot on!

G IS FOR GENESIS ...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SSwpW_QKz_I

Random Memorial for Monday 4/4/11

Gone but not forgotten: Maggie Simpson's speaking part.

When I grew up, Liz Taylor was someone who adopted Michael Jackson, sold White Diamonds and raised awareness and major funds for charities and organizations long before it was hip to do so. I can barely recall the curse she put on Luke and Laura, and I have Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf on the old DVR to watch some upcoming weekend, but I knew of her much more as a personality more than an actress.

For her courage to take a stand, for her fierce independent streak, for the fact that she's now made Maggie Simpson a mute, Liz Taylor -- you will be missed.

OF COURSE, SHE HASN'T "REALLY" SPOKEN SINCE 1992 ANYWAY:

http://www.four.co.nz/Maggie-Simpsons-one-word/tabid/1699/articleID/69643/Default.aspx

SHE PUT HER MONEY WHERE HER MOUTH WAS:

http://www.looktothestars.org/news/6006-elizabeth-taylors-charity-legacy

THE WEDDING AND IT's SOAP OPERA AFTERMATH:

http://generalhospital.about.com/od/topmomentsinghhistory/a/LandLWedding.htm

Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 4/3/11

What the Palm Desert area is talking about this week (I'm midway through a vacation of sorts on the Left Coast):

Between the shootings last evening at parties gone wrong in nearby Cathedral City, the hole in the Southwest plane that caused an emergency landing after a "nose dive" and the government shut-down looming by week's end ... I have to now get through two more nights of being social at bar clubs in the area (does every angry drunk have a gun nowadays?) before I find out if my flight out with Southwest (on Tuesday originally ...) is on track (and not caught up in the 600 or so cancelled flights this weekend that have to be reworked into the system on planes that don't have sky-light options). Regardless, I need to get back home to Chicago before the FAA and the rest of the government gets furloughed during the partisan squabble.

Me thinks adventure might lie ahead ...

A COACHELLA HOUSE PARTY WITH 100 FLEEING TEENS:

http://www.kpsplocal2.com/Content/Top-Stories/story/Three-Teens-Shot-in-Coachella/qoPC1bRa8Uihf7mbVMDpqg.cspx

THE "SKYLIGHT" FEATURE, COURTESY OF TWITPICS!:

http://news.cnet.com/8301-17852_3-20050000-71.html

IF THEY SHUT DOWN AROUND TAX TIME, CAN I GET ALL MY MONEY BACK?:

http://news.yahoo.com/s/csm/370533

Random Soapbox for Saturday 4/2/11

I don't mean to go off on a rant here, but ...

... for goodness sakes, boys and girls -- let's all keep our alcohol fueled activities in check.

On the alcoholic continuum (ranging from practicing Muslim on one end to Charlie Sheen on the other), I fall somewhere near the middle, comfortably positioned between social drinker and occasional binger. I will schedule my evenings of debauchery (and, as I age, the day or two for recovery thereafter) and I do look back frequently to marvel about how quickly one Guinness can become eight or ten -- but I still have found a way to minimize any extremely unsafe situations (it helps that I'm mostly a happy individual when under the influence).

As the generation behind me launches into spring break, I am troubled with the faster!more!now! atmosphere that has advanced insta-buzz tricks beyond the beer funnels or jello shots of my youth to the latest (and increasingly more dangerous) trend of "eyeballing vodka". I imagine some accident akin to "you've got peanut butter in my chocolate/chocolate in my peanut butter" is to blame, but the hard core partiers looking for instant inebriation are now taking shots of pure vodka directly through the eyeball.

I'm sure the alcohol IV is right around the corner ... but please save those kinds of stunts for Jackass 4-ever (or whatever version the oft testicularly tortured Johnny Knoxville is on now). Can't we all just draw the line at drinking through a straw when it comes to "accelerating my buzz" innovations?

IT's ALL THE RAGE IN ENGLAND:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1278583/Young-people-drinking-neat-vodka-EYE-quick-buzz.html

YOU CAN ALWAYS GO THIS ROUTE--GUINNESS HAS MORE BUZZ PER UNIT:

http://www.guinness.com/

JUST IN CASE YOU FALL TO THE EDGE OF THE CONTINUUM:

http://www.aa.org/?Media=PlayFlash

Random Flashback for Friday 4/1/11

It was a picnic, but not in the William Inge kind of way. A celebration, but without Kool and the Gang origins. A union-like sponsored gathering, but not with overtones like those in the hallways of government buildings in Madison.

It was ... the group scene in LVC's production of The Pajama Game from 1991 ... I believe to the lyrics of something like "this is my once a year day".

Good times. Breaking in the new scrim. Fighting management to get the workers' a raise. Isn't it funny how some things don't really change!