Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 5/31/15

What southern Florida is talking about this week:

... the start of Hurricane season 2015 -- which is *officially* tomorrow, despite the fact that Ana already happened in May.

It may only be the second year that I have a personal stake in the outcome (because I'm now a Floridian, with my stints as Chicagoan and central Pennsylvanian now in the record books), and it may be that these particular environs haven't had anything substantial to discuss since 2005's Wilma (which, by its name, you know hit late in the season [in turn, it was the first major one since 1950 to hit my current 'hood, so there's hope that we might be on a once-every-55-years instead of a once-every-10-years cycle]) ... but it still means that I have to be "in the know" when it comes to storm preparedness.

At a minimum, that means scoping out the list of potential names ... I'm somewhat partial to
Hurricane Fred (it just sounds so basic), but also secretly hopeful that we get to back-to-back named storms Pete(r) and Rose (because I know how much he enjoys his press).  All kidding aside ... here's hoping that it's a calm uneventful season, and that, wherever storms make landfall, folks are prepared.

From me and mine to you and yours ... Happy Hurricane season!

FORECAST IS FOR BELOW NORMAL:
http://www.weather.com/storms/hurricane/news/hurricane-season-forecast-atlantic-2015-noaa-weather-channel-csu

A SUPPLY LIST (YOU KNOW, JUST IN CASE ...):
http://www.al.com/news/mobile/index.ssf/2015/05/hurricane_season_2015_heres_a.html

HURRICANE NAMING FOR DUMMIES:
http://miami.about.com/od/weather/a/2015hurricanes.htm

Random Soapbox for Saturday 5/30/15

I don't mean to go off on a rant here, but ...

... for the nth time, where n = a really really big number, I do NOT need to have a conversation whilst my hairs are being cut.

I know it's impolite to tell the barber to shut up (and potentially dangerous, considering the sharp implements in play), so I communicate in the way that I thought was universally understood ... i.e.  closing my eyes after informing him that "it's a half all the way around, thank you very much" and, you know, pretending that I was asleep -- or at least on my way to being asleep.

This last time, the attempt at conversation included the man with the clippers asking me, in broken English, "you don't like your hair, do you?"  I wasn't sure how to reply -- other than, "I'd like a half all the way around, thank you very much".

I mean I don't get my hair cut because of some hair dysmorphic disorder ... I do it because I don't like to have longer hair on my face than my scalp (and I keep my goatee pretty close to the skin, so as not to totally obfuscate the fact that I have a swell cleft in my chin) AND because, in so doing, I can more easily pretend that I don't have a giant bald spot on the top of my head (conveniently not visible when I look in the mirror, but a part of what everyone can see, apparently) AND because, once the sides get long enough that it stands straight up and out on its way to being all curly and unruly such that I need to dig out a baseball cap that's covered in twenty year old dirt (it's too delicate to wash now) any time I go out in public -- *those* are the reasons that I come to the shop almost every two weeks.

So please, mister barber men -- "I'd like a half all the way around, thank you very much" and let's leave it at that!

NOW *THIS* GUY ... HE *HATES* HIS HAIR:
http://www.psychforums.com/body-dysmorphic-disorder/topic34168.html

NOW *THIS* GUY ... HE AGREES WITH ME:
http://www.abovetopsecret.com/forum/thread441023/pg1

SINCE WE'RE ON THE SUBJECT OF THE HAIR CUTTING BUSINESS:
http://justsomething.co/27-hilarious-kid-haircuts-fails/

Random Flashback for Friday 5/29/15

A May can't go by (at least during the time frame recalling twenty years ago, as is the construct for my Friday flashbacks) without a photo or two from the annual Central Pennsylvania Hugh O'Brian Youth Foundation Leadership Seminar (or HOBY for short).

And for the year being represented herein (1995), counting last week's picture, this now makes two images from that event on the Millersville University campus two decades ago.

This was my group ... 1H, as you can tell ... and clearly I was in my "Larry King look" phase of dressing up!  Oh to be that young again ... although it does make me wonder if I could rock the suspenders now that I'm in my early/mid 40's ...

Random Thought for Thursday 5/28/15

March 20.

Actually, March 21st, if we're being completely accurate, seeing as how it was after midnight when it happened.

That was the last time I touched a drop of alcohol ... UNTIL tonight.

It's not so much that I decided to rebrand myself as a teetotaler.  Let's face it ... I love my Guinness *way* too much.

Instead, it's just the way it worked out.  Instead of bar crawling once of twice a month, that money went to fixing up the back yard.  (As such, I'd like to apologize to my regular bar staff for having neglected them for most of this year.)

The alcohol-fast ENDS tonight, because the ShirlyEd visit STARTS tonight.  Here's to remembering to pace myself over the next few days and to committing to preventative measures with the aspirin and the water AND, of course, to enjoying visiting with family!

DULY NOTED:
http://www.webmd.com/balance/features/how-to-hold-your-liquor

I THINK I *GAINED* WEIGHT DURING THIS CIRCUMSTANTIAL ALCO-FAST:
http://www.webmd.com/balance/features/how-to-hold-your-liquor

I MADE IT 60+ DAYS (AND THAT WAS IT):
http://www.spiritualriver.com/what-are-the-benefits-of-quitting-drinking-and-making-it-to-30-days-sober/

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 5/27/15

Queen of the Hill.

Used in a sentence:  "It is NOT John Boehner in a dress (and yes, you're welcome for *that* image) ... and it is NOT a more modern feminist-friendly update on the classic playground game of 'king of the hill' (but really ... how co-ed was your elementary school playground at that age anyway?) ... but 'Queen of the Hill' IS a way to pass a bill that Schoolhouse Rock somehow omitted in their classy song (as did all of my political science professors along the way, at least as far as I can recall)."

Made famous a month or two back when our Congress was trying to get creative with its gridlocky ways at the same time the Republicans were trying to address the rift in their own party between the various competing "I'm more Republican than you are" factions, I hadn't heard of it and, rather than return my degree to dear old LVC, I went and looked it up on the interwebs, where I learned that it is "a special rule that permits votes on a series of amendments, usually complete substitutes for a measure, but directs that the amendment receiving the greatest number of votes is the winning amendment*".

There you go ... and who says government can't be "fun"!?

*THE SOURCE OF THE ABOVE QUOTE:
http://hobnobblog.com/2012/04/substitute-substitute-amendment-queen-of-the-hill-rule-congressionalglossary-com/

THE SOURCE OF THE PROBLEM BY WHICH I LEARNED OF 'QUEEN OF THE HILL':
http://www.cnn.com/2015/03/24/politics/house-gop-budget-doc-fix-obamacare/

AND MORE CLASSIC PLAYGROUND GAMES:
http://americanprofile.com/articles/top-10-classic-playground-games/

Random Tune for Tuesday 5/26/15

This will be a judgment free zone.

If the teen mall singers phenomenon randomly popped into my head recently (as with most flashbacks to the eighties, it likely happened due to watching an episode of the Goldbergs), and if I actually paused and thought to myself whether, back then, I was more Team Tiffany or Team Debbie, and I realized that I *was* Team Debbie, and that the song I picked for tonight, which happened to come out the same month I ran away (March 1989, for those of you keeping track at home), was the one that I remembered most (what with its uplifting call to action for an electric future) ... well then so be it.

Judgment free zone.

THE FUTURE ONLY BELONGS TO THE FUTURE ITSELF!:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8I_WavHGBdA

Random Memorial for Monday 5/25/15

Gone but not forgotten:  those who sacrificed for us all to be free.

Which, since 2000, is apparently supposed to happen at 3pm on the holiday, a change made to the tradition that I didn't know until looking for Memorial Day related links for today's post.

While I don't want to participate in all the "bbq shaming" that seems to be super prevalent this year on social media, spending 60 seconds in a moment of silence does seem to be the smallest of concessions for those who gave their lives.  And for those who *continue* to give their lives, as Brecht's Mother Courage and those who have read her know all too well, the business of war is ever present ... evidenced in both the continued conflicts in Iraq and Afghanistan AND in the all too high suicide rate for those soldiers returning haunted by what they've seen.

It's a somber moment indeed ... but that's precisely the point.  So to the 1,354,664+ war related US casualties (according to the wonder that is the Wikipedia [and with a heavy emphasis on the +, since war kills more than soldiers]), at least for sixty seconds at 3pm today, you will be missed.

STOP WHAT YOU'RE DOING AT 3pm TO PARTICIPATE:
http://www.forbes.com/sites/causeintegration/2015/05/24/memorial-day-3pm-dont-forget/

THESE CHARTS ARE ONGOING:
http://icasualties.org/

AS ARE THE WAR-RELATED DEATHS:
http://stopsoldiersuicide.org/help-soldiers/

Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 5/24/15

What southern Florida is talking about this week:

Snuggle deliveries (and other dog-related stories to give you a smile this holiday weekend).

First up ... the local human society will now, for a fee of $150, come to your place of employment and allow employees to snuggle with dogs and cats for an hour to relieve stress and to boost company morale.  Sadly, my company is mostly remote and likely won't pay to send them to *my* home for an hour for that fee, but maybe we can work something out?

Second up ... that same humane society runs *another* program, called Wags & Tales, which sends dogs to libraries so little kids who struggle with reading can practice reading out loud to them to build confidence (seeing as how the puppies aren't about to judge or correct them).  I know that there are *all* kinds of therapy animals, but this one sounded like the most creative one yet.

Third up ... not from this county, but from the other coast in Florida ... and not so much a feel good story as a cautionary tale ... but Tampa says that the dog flu is on the rise this year ... so consider you and your furry friends forewarned.

And with that ... from me and mine to you and yours ... go have a happy holiday!

NOW AVAILABLE TO VISIT A WORKPLACE NEAR YOU (IN THIS COUNTY):
http://www.fortlauderdaleconnex.com/pets/29256-snuggle-delivery-now-available-from-the-humane-society-of-broward-county.html

YET ANOTHER PROGRAM OF INTEREST (IN THIS COUNTY):
https://humanebroward.com/programs/teachers/wags-n-tales/

WARNING!  BEWARE THE DOG FLU (HOPEFULLY NOT YET IN THIS COUNTY):
https://humanebroward.com/programs/teachers/wags-n-tales/

Random Soapbox for Saturday 5/23/15

I don't mean to go off on a rave here, but ...

[remember, the doctor said one rave a month instead of always ranting is best for my health so I'm not angry all the time ...]

... there's no wonder why The Amazing Race is as Emmy-loved as it is, what with season 26 just wrapping up yet another ... well ... amazing race.

Once upon a time, I used to comment on this blog on every single leg along the way, and then along came on-demand and binge watching, which meant I was more likely to catch up on the show at a later time and often with multiple episodes at once. Of course, as the popularity of the show has waned, so has the likelihood that I'd stumble on a spoiler via social media or the like so the viewing urgency faded away as well (as yet another example of that, I was able to watch the American Idol finale more than a week after it aired, and I still didn't know how it ended so I was surprised... which would have been impossible a few seasons ago).

I can't say that I've watched every season of the Race from the start (truth be told, it was actually my affinity for all things Bonnie Hunt and *her* linking up with the show promotionally during her eponymous talk show [speaking of which, where has *she* been?] that got me interested) ... but I have been a faithful and loyal viewer once I got started.

So three cheers to this season, which introduced the blind date concept (and which created a first for me ... where I found myself hoping that half of one of those paired teams would go home yet wanting the other half to stay [yes, Blair and Hayley, I'm talking about you!]) and which continued its ways of proving that karma exists AND which provided the ongoing service of travelling-vicariously to those of us who just don't get out of the United States so much any more *AND* which demonstrated a truism first made widely known on this show ... namely, that it all comes down to the luck of the draw of your cabbie (and that the language barrier here at home in those scenarios is often *worse* than when in a foreign country).

Here's looking ahead to next year's races!

THE CAST OF THE SEASON JUST ENDED:
http://www.cbs.com/shows/amazing_race/season/26/cast/

YES IT'S COMING BACK!:
http://www.cbs.com/shows/cbs-fall-previews-2015/news/1004211/check-out-cbs-s-2015-2016-new-primetime-lineup/

I MISS BONNIE:
http://www.biography.com/people/bonnie-hunt-9542048

Random Flashback for Friday 5/22/15

In light of the retirement of David Letterman this week, it seemed only fitting for tonight that I choose the one time I know of where *I* appeared on a top ten list ... twenty years ago when this picture was taken.

Of course, maybe I shouldn't really be blog-bragging since I was only item number seven on the list, but it was still an honor all the same.

The occasion?  My annual (for a few years, anyway) participation in the central PA Hugh O'Brian Youth Foundation leadership seminar (which I attended first as a sophomore representing my high school way back in 1987). This particular image was presented during the annual talent show ... by the alumni association ... which I was advising at the time ... so they may have been a little biased towards liking me.

It is hard to imagine that two decades have passed since my heyday with this group, but I'll always have the memories.  And unless you've been through the experience, it's hard to put it into words ... other than ... of course (for those in the know) ... it was ... OUTSTANDING!

Random Thought for Thursday 5/21/15

Congratulations to all those who executed the "tunnel to towers" climb last weekend, nearly 2000 stairs (the winner, in much better health than I am, apparently did it in just sixteen minutes).  Participants included a local (to southern Florida) woman who did so in honor of her brother, a fire captain who died during the events of  9.11.

Adding to the goodness around the day ... funds were raised to build "smart" homes for disabled vets during this first ever charity event in the new building.

[The blue angels also did a fly-by ... which made for a nice picture found on the google but undoubtedly gave cause for pause to a lot of New Yorkers  ...]

Here's to the memory of all those who perished on that day ... and to the survivors who rally around those memories for a great cause.

THE LOCAL STAIR CLIMBER:
http://www.sun-sentinel.com/news/michael-mayo-blog/sfl-mayo-wtc-climb-20150518-story.html

THE NATIONAL COVERAGE:
http://www.cnn.com/2015/05/17/us/new-york-freedom-tower-stair-climb/

*THIS* CLIMB WAS *NOT* AUTHORIZED:
http://abcnews.go.com/US/nj-teen-sneaks-past-security-climbs-world-trade/story?id=22982624

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 5/20/15

Cozens.

Used in a sentence:  "Who cares what it means, cozens just replaced zanies as my highest scoring word in Words with Friends!"

Gully (Rich G), that means you are no longer in the record books as the person against whom I scored the most points (that person's name will be anonymous for now unless he or she names him or herself).

I'm just excited to have had the opportunity for a new personal best.

Oh ... and by the way ... cozens is not another way to spell that particular classification of your relatives NOR is it the full spelling of the nickname that guys used to give each other back in the early nineties even if they weren't related BUT is the plural action of deceiving someone via "artful coaxing and wheedling or shrewd trickery" ... i.e. shrewd trickery ... like how sometimes you play a word in that game that you don't actually know but that just so happens to line up with a triple letter AND a triple word so you're delighted to see it approved.

COZEN, THE DICTIONARY DEFINITION:
http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/cozen

WELL NOW I'M DEFLATED:
https://recordsetter.com/world-record/highest-point-value-give-for-single-word-game-words-with-friends/5303

THE NEXT CHALLENGE:
http://mashable.com/2013/08/22/words-with-friends-international/

Random Tune for Tuesday 5/19/15

Remember how busy I was of late counting down the songs off of that college-era mixed tape?

Well, during that time, there was an album that was released that I went out to buy the first day it happened ... which means I normally would have featured it on a Tuesday ... and so tonight I catch up on that overdue task.

And it seems like the right time, what with the final season of Idol being announced, and this year's winner being chosen, and this song being sung at the Billboard Music Awards this past weekend.

So maybe I missed Heartbeat Song when it came out as the first tune off of the album ... but I'm super timely with the second one from Ms. Clarkson, officially released just yesterday  ... also known as ... Invincible.

RUNNING FROM AN EMPTY THREAD OF EMPTINESS AND ABANDONMENT:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EB7au2PdddQ

Random Memorial for Monday 5/18/15

Gone but not forgotten:  the last bottle of Gazebo room on hand.

Funny how, when you move from where you grew up, you create a list of "specialty items" that you try to acquire for your pantry in your new locale.

The list once included things like Yeungling (not available in Chicago but in the grocery stores here in Florida) and Tastikakes (once found only in the Walmarts but now available all over BUT no longer purchased as I'm *somewhat* watching my waistline) and Lebanon Bologna (also not in Chicago but kind of found here in Florida ... in that it's an acceptable substitute that doesn't quite get the consistency right but tastes mostly like the home grown stuff).

Now the list of items being missed for which suitcase space is worth saving has been narrowed down to Bickels chips, Utz BBQ ridged chips and the Gazebo room dressing (which I only discovered the years I was a Harrisburgian).  The worst part about this predicament?  I'm not sure that I have plans to visit the place where this stuff is sold until my college's 150th birthday party in October 2016.

Salad dressing that I once tried to drink straight out of the bottom of the bowl because I loved it soooo much, for the next 17 months or so ... you will be missed.

OH WAIT ... MAYBE IT'S AS EASY AS ORDERING IT ONLINE:
http://gazeboroom.com/

OH WAIT ... MAYBE IT'S AS EASY AS ORDERING IT ONLINE:
http://utzsnacks.com/

OH WAIT ... YOU GET THE IDEA:
http://www.bickelssnacks.com/

Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 5/17/15

What southern Florida is talking about this week:

Politics and Presidential elections!

It doesn't matter that election day is many many months away ... it's begun.  I know this for sure, because, on the Facebook, folks have already started talking about pruning friend lists and taking a FBvaca until, you know, 2017.  [Me ... I *like* being connected to people that represent all different points on the continuum, because that makes it much easier to keep track of the crazies of both extremes AND I don't have to watch the politicized talking head shows seeing as how the talking points just get mindlessly regurgitated by those incapable of independent thought.]

In particular for these environs. the talk of late is whether a Bush-Rubio ticket (note the junior position for the junior candidate) would be constitutional, seeing as how both reside in Florida (see the links for explanations as to how "it's possible but not likely and would involve more fun electoral college math that might even send the VP decision to the Senate" from some individuals who are much smarter than I am).

I've said before on this very blog ... I so enjoyed my dozen or so years in wonderful Chi-town, but one of the reasons for the move to Florida was for the political intrigue that goes on in this state (and to feel like my vote actually counts).

Let the games begin!

COMMENTARY ON THE BUSH-RUBIO CONUNDRUM NEAR THE END OF THE POST:
http://www.centerforpolitics.org/crystalball/articles/the-new-world-order/

WELCOME TO THE ALL POWERFUL ELECTORAL COLLEGE:
http://www.washingtonexaminer.com/the-tricky-but-not-impossible-electoral-math-of-a-bush-rubio-ticket/article/2559778

GET READY!  2016 WILL BE THE YEAR FOR FACEBOOK AND POLITICS:
http://www.buzzfeed.com/bensmith/the-facebook-election#.jwdzzyjRR

Random Soapbox for Saturday 5/16/15

I don't mean to go off on a rant here, but ...

... I do despise the fact that you're never truly healed.  And that your mind chooses the strangest of times to remind you of your past.

In other words ... it's time to re-tell the story of the stray.

I was doing yardwork, because I'm old and that's what old people do on the weekend, working on the outside of the fence, cleaning up the overgrowth that had all but taken over the sidewalk, when a collarless dog went trotting past, right in the middle of the four lanes of traffic that go by ye *new* olde homestead here in Florida.  The dog kept on going, so I noted it as unusual, and continued with my chores.

However, it wasn't long before the stray returned, hanging out in the spot where I had just been working, nosing the fence to befriend one of the two dogs who RUN ye *new* olde homestead.  Seeing that as a sign that I was to intervene, I went around with a bowl of water (it's HOT here in Florida) to gain his trust, and returned almost immediately with a peanut butter bone treat, which the stray smelled, liked and followed me (and it) around to the gated back yard.

A few hours passed (I didn't have access to a car until early evening for the next phase of the plan ... to get to a vet to see if the boy was chipped), and my new friend got sweeter as the day went on, following me around as I did other outside chores, and curling up underneath the bench where I passed time reading in the afternoon.  (The two dogs who live here already were kept inside, because one was being very vocal about not wanting to mingle, and because there were just too many unknown variables to mix the other with a stray.)

Ultimately, the trip to the vet *did* happen and the stray *was* chipped (and was named Achilles) and his original family was notified.  However, that family took its time to come claim him, despite being just two blocks away.

It was during that time frame, while I was waiting, that the past came crashing down around me.  You see, I was once a stray, and dependent on the kindness of others to determine my fate.  The fact that it was more than twenty years ago ... not a factor as I looked into Achilles' eyes and started projecting all of my long buried feelings on to him.  He may not have understood all the details as to why my mood had changed, but he did what all dogs universally do in that type of situation ... he looked back at me and jumped up to put his front paws in my lap and nudged me to let me know that I needn't be sad in his presence.

Except my spiral worsened.  Because, with *his* reaction, my memories continued to flood back, and soon I was recalling how I had tried to escape my home situation more than once before I succeeded.  Each time, I had made it off the premises of the house from which I was running away, and each time I was returned as the circumstances hadn't quite lined up just right for me to completely escape.

What if Achilles hadn't accidentally gotten out and that he was trying for a new and better life?  What if my actions, while "right" on the surface, were actually returning him to a place where he didn't want to be?  What if the little guy was actually taking his first steps of freedom as an escape and I was about to be an accomplice ... in sending him right back to where he didn't want to be?

Achilles' owners took two and half hours from the time of notification to come and pick him up (ostensibly, although they had "spent the day" searching for him, they had gone over to the next county to visit family in the evening, and needed at least an hour to get back home).  As you can imagine, that only served to feed my psychosis, and made me fearful of the reunion I had coordinated.

Eventually, that reunion happened ... and luckily for all parties involved, Achilles ran to the family that climbed out of the SUV (a mother, father and at least 3-4 kids) and he seemed genuinely happy to be back with those whom he knew, even trying to jump up into the arms of the father.  It was then that I was reminded that this wasn't about me ... and that I had let my past confuse my present and infuse doubt regarding my actions.

After all, at the end of the day, Achilles' happy ending in the here and now was what was important ... and the memories that I needed to dwell on were not the ones from the troubled times (my Achilles' heel if you will) but the ones from all of the successes I had had in my life thanks to those who took the time to help me ... when *I* was the stray way back when.

That's the lesson of Achilles for me ...

ACHILLES AND HIS HEEL:
http://wserver.scc.losrios.edu/~waxmanr/87online/student_sites/morco_luisa/myths/tale_of_achillies.html

ANOTHER LESSON OF ACHILLES:
http://pets.webmd.com/features/microchipping-your-dog-or-cat

SO THE QUOTE IS APPARENTLY FROM AN ANIME CHARACTER:
http://animeboards.com/showthread.php?t=45714

Random Flashback for Friday 5/15/15

As I recall the story, I was sitting in the office of the director of activities at LVC (for a time, she was also my boss, since I worked at the college center as part of my work-study program [and the cafeteria ... and the library]), and she asked me to name a band that we might be able to get for a set budgeted amount of dollars to perform a concert at the semester's end twenty years ago around this time in 1995.

I'm not saying that I'm the sole reason Toad the Wet Sprocket performed on campus that year ... but I am saying I helped plant the seed that got them there ... and that I fetched 3 of the 4 band members in my little two door Ford Escort from the Quality Inn in Lebanon before the show (lead singer Glen Phillips had stayed on the tour bus on campus) ... and that I was rewarded with autographs on my Pale cassette (including Glen, whom the other guys tracked down for me after the show to make the autographs a complete set) ... and that I was one of nearly two dozen staff members that guarded the stage in the gym, protecting a buffer zone in front of the crowd that made the lead singer so awkward, he stopped the show and asked just about everyone with the STAFF shirts to disperse because he felt like he was performing in a prison.

I've been lucky to have seen them twice more as they toured various parts of the midwest, but they will forever be ... "the soundtrack of my college years" (as any reader knows due to their prevalence in previous posts).

Random Thought for Thursday 5/14/15

Monday, May 18th, is the next opportunity for inmate Justin Granier to learn whether there is hope that his sentence of life without parole might be somehow overturned, as an appeals process moves forward with a hearing on that date.

Justin's story is one of a few profiled in the documentary "Serving Life', once on OWN and currently available on Netflix DVD, which touchingly portrayed younger prisoners providing hospice care to those passing away deep within the penal system.

The documentary highlights how Louisiana is the world's prison capital:  ("The state imprisons more of its people, per head, than any of its U.S. counterparts. First among Americans means first in the world. Louisiana's incarceration rate is nearly five times Iran's, 13 times China's and 20 times Germany's.*") AND it calls into question the overall fairness of sentencing.

Second chances seem hard to come by in an arena with deeply systemic problems ... but the hope remains alive for those who dare to believe that justice can have a transcendent meaning and that rehabilitation and release should triumph over the almighty dollar.  Our thoughts are with Justin and those who love and support him at this critical time.

LOUISIANA'S EMBARRASSING TITLE (AND SOURCE OF ABOVE *QUOTE):
http://www.nola.com/crime/index.ssf/2012/05/louisiana_is_the_worlds_prison.html

THE DOCUMENTARY THAT STARTED IT ALL:
http://www.npr.org/2011/10/19/141505983/serving-life-prisoners-find-humanity-in-face-of-death

NEWS ON THE APPEAL PROCESS:
http://theadvocate.com/news/weeklies/12189480-123/appeal-in-ascension-parish-murder

BONUS LINK (RUN BY THOSE WHO LOVE AND SUPPORT HIM):
http://www.justingranier.com/

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 5/13/15

Slip, Slop, Slap and Wrap.

Used in a sentence:  "It's time for the annual message as we head into sunny summertime (even now relevant to those of you in places like where I *used* to live [Chicago's 100 days of summer anyone?]) ... which is to protect yourself from the skin cancer with a few preventative steps, Eselsbrücked for you with the catchy slogan Slip, Slop, Slap and Wrap!"

Note:  It strikes me that you could reverse the order of those commands and it would also serve as a sex education of sorts for the males (clearly different cartoon images would need to be used).

Also note:  It is true that this phrase was featured as wordplay on a previous Wednesday (on 6.15.11 to be exact).  I know yesterday's post was a repeat ... and if once is a coincidence, and twice is a pattern ... will there be a third to make a trend?  Tune in tomorrow to see.  Regardless, public service announcements like these are worth being repeated every four years, no?

Also also note:  not familiar with the Eselsbrücke?  Perhaps I shall make it an upcoming Wednesday wordplay?  Until then, there's a link below/to follow for a clue ...

UH-OH, I'M REPEATING MYSELF (BUT IT *IS* AN IMPORTANT MESSAGE):
http://capcognition.blogspot.com/2011/06/random-wordplay-for-wednesday-61511.html

EARLY NOTICE:  DON'T FRY DAY IS JUST OVER A WEEK AWAY:
http://skincancerprevention.org/programs/dont-fry-day

IN CASE YOU'RE NOT HIP TO THE ESESLSBRüCKE:
http://en.bab.la/dictionary/german-english/eselsbruecke

Random Tune for Tuesday 5/12/15

I am prepared to defend any accusations made that what I am about to do is "lazy micro-blogging", but I'll be damned if what I said in my post on Mar 18, 2014 doesn't deserve to be reprinted verbatim (with an adjustment).  First, the verbatim part:

"You must start watching the Goldbergs on ABC, particularly if you have any part of your personal development that occurred in the eighties.

Not only do you get quality acting (across the board ... even/especially the young 'uns on the show ... not to mention the inimitable [Wendi McLendon-Covey]), but you get the best use of snippets of song on a weekly television program since Scrubs (and I'm even including that odd AfterScrubs concept year).  My only hope is that they will follow in the steps of Scrubs and release a soundtrack or two each season, because they are picking the best parts of the eighties to feature in every episode, and I can't help but smile every time I hear the opening chords of whatever tune they've worked into the plot.

Like, for instance .."

Now here comes the "adjustment" part (actually, the *second* adjustment, if you count how I corrected the previous misspelling of Wendi McLendon-Covey's name).  The last time, I was featuring the usage of a certain Mister Mister tune ... today, it's the John Hiatt classic instead that brought a tear or two to my eyes when it was woven into the plot recently.

Oh yeah ... and release the damn Goldbergs soundtrack already!

WHEN YOUR SECRET HEART CANNOT SPEAK SO EASILY:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8UkKTlzyLhQ

Random Memorial for Monday 5/11/15

Gone but not forgotten:  Santa Claus.

Yes, indeed ... Santa Claus.  Is.  Dead.

Just to be clear, I'm not trying to damage your young 'uns (or your old 'uns who still believe [who am I to judge?]), but I am reporting the news from earlier this month that Frank Olivo has died.

Growing up in central PA, I would have thought I'd have seen this on the Facebook, but luckily the local southern Florida paper covered the story and informed me that the man who was a substitute Santa at the 1968 game between the Eagles and the Vikings ... and who was booed and snowballed whilst "Here Comes Santa Claus" was played on the sideline ... passed away at the age of 66.

You who represented just how dicky Philly fans can be -- Frankie O -- you will continue to live in infamy ... and you will be missed (although maybe not by any of those darn Philadelphia grumps -- I hope they didn't cheer at your funeral.)

THE "ATTACK" ON SANTA:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AWvza6en5Rg

RIP FRANK OLIVO:
http://www.pennlive.com/sports/index.ssf/2015/05/frank_olivo_fill-in_santa_booe.html

SURELY ON THE LIST:
http://bleacherreport.com/articles/816529-ranking-the-30-absolute-worst-fans-in-sports-history

Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 5/10/15

What southern Florida is talking about this week:

Mother's Day, of course!  So Happy Mother's Day to ...

She who bore me*:  Mother Mary ...

Those required to refer to me as their son by the power vested in God and the state of Pennsylvania (at least for the period of time between that ceremony and the divorce decree):  MaryAnn, Paulette and that last one late in my father's life whose name I don't even remember (don't judge me ... it was his "spite marriage" anyway).

Those who graced my life as motherly substitutes:  Judy W, Laura W and Evelyne L.

Those grand motherly types, now all deceased:  Esther N, Irene S and JoAnn D.

Those strong women who influenced my life in other ways:  Aunt Catherine in Elverson, Mrs. K of high school (Polly K), Mrs K of college (Roz K) and Aunt Shirly of Indiana.

*Honorable mention this day to my momma's egg lurking behind the 70's style IUD that one of my father's little swimmies overcame as an obstacle.  And a special thanks to said IUD for being so lazy on the job, hence allowing me a chance to have something to say on this holiday.

And to whichever one of of you sent this actual email to my work address (it was caught in spam) ... very very funny!

THANK YOU IUD, FOR BEING SO INEFFECTIVE IN THE SEVENTIES:
http://www.gynob.com/history-of-the-iud.htm

THE 'ORIGINAL' MOTHER'S DAY MESSAGE:
http://time.com/3850695/mothers-day-2015-origins/

HELP YOUR MOM NAVIGATE THE INTERNET SPAM FREE:
http://ask.metafilter.com/201132/Mom-stop-sending-me-spam

Random Soapbox for Saturday 5/9/15

I don't mean to go off on a rant here, but ...

... I-S-I-whatever-the-consonant, be not proud.

Meaning, I have to say I was somewhat shocked that the terrorist organization claimed "credit" for the Garland TX chain of events, seeing as how it was such a failure (from that perspective) that I would think *no one* would want to celebrate the fact that two idiots got out of a car and were shot dead in minutes, having barely grazed the ankle of a well armed good shootin' traffic cop.  Surely the bad guys have better planning skills than to try a shoot-out -- in Texas.  Texas of all places, where I'm sure that the youngest residents get baby's-first-gun shortly after graduating from their pacifier-stage.

What I'd really rather they clarify is whether these two dolts still get in on the virgin action, despite being martyrs-out-of-stupidity.  I don't know for sure but I'm guessing Allah probably has a separate stash of virgins for this type of crusader ... virgins by "circumstance", let's say.  (That's the polite way to say it, right?  Not the PYTs with the promise rings who get by doing the dirtiest things on the down low ... but just not that *one* thing.  I mean the older never-been-touched group.  [And if any reader feels an affinity to that group, I want to insist that I mean no harm by it and will not stop *you* from laying claim to being a virgin-by-choice instead.])

By the way ... can I just pause and say how much I'd rather have the view of the religion in which I was raised -- everlasting life with crown jewels -- even IF it is somewhat on the capitalistic greedy end of the incentive continuum -- than the somewhat sexually perverse hymen-popping paradise that is promised for those who die for he-who-shant-be-cartooned..  They do realize, I hope, that it's not a bottomless bowl of cherries like some Islamic Garden of Olive, and that the hymens aren't going to grow back like they did for vampire Jessica on True Blood.  So if their paradise is forever, I just have to suspect that there's a lot of grief that comes after those 72 membrane-destructions.  All things considered, that activity is but a fraction of eternity, and those 72 flowers (or de-flowers, more accurately stated) are going to need constant attention.  Needy, nagging attention.  Instead, give me gold and rubies and shiny things in *my* afterlife ALL DAY SON as a reward for my good deeds, yo!

I digress ... and I have to be careful because the last thing I want is a fatwa.  I'm in no rush to be Rushdied.  And I have to tell you, those insecure leaders are awfully quick with handing them out ... they're the seedy lawyers of the religion world, ready to fatwa at the mention of a Mo, as if they learned at the school of the Oprah ... you get a fatwa ... YOU get a fatwa ... everybody gets a FATWAAAA!

Of course, I'd be remiss to say that I didn't agree with those who put some blame on the cartoonist convention that was clearly asking for trouble.  I know it's free speech and all, but if you can't yell "fire" in a crowded theatre, surely in today's day and age, we're somewhat close to agreeing that you can't yell "cartoon-Mo" in a crowded mosque either.  Or in a tolerant society.  I-S-I-whatever-the-consonant-bait much?

Last thing ... despite how it may sound, I do NOT mean to make light of our modern world's struggle with the terrorism.  I was in my late 20's on 9.11.01 (about as late as you can get, seeing as how I was turning the big 3-0 just four months later ... but the age still started with a 2), and it did have an effect me as a young adult.  I grew up with five year plans, and I stopped planning for the future after that day.  I decided that living apocalypse-adjacent meant that, more than anything, day to day survival was key, and so it was perfectly acceptable to trade the future for the present, because the present was all that was guaranteed.  (When I'm sleeping on park benches in my seventies and telling this story to anyone who will listen at the soup kitchen, I'll pause at this point in the story to reflect on its poignancy.)

I get it.  Terrorism is a part of our life.  The crusade struggle is real.  It's not going away.  It will continue to strike at random.

So I guess I'm saying ... may we all be as ready as the Garland traffic cop ... stay frosty, folks, stay frosty.

YOU'RE GOING TO TAKE CREDIT INSTEAD OF BEING EMBARRASSED? REALLY??:
http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2015/05/05/isil-texas-attack/26910117/

SO LET'S TALK ABOUT THIS HYMEN-POPPING PARADISE:
http://wikiislam.net/wiki/72_Virgins

LIVIN' APOCALYPSE-ADJACENT:
http://www.scientificamerican.com/article/911-the-psychological-aft/

Random Flashback for Friday 5/8/15

Yes, I know.  It's *yet* another picture of those of us who performed in my MMQs back in the day (that day being twenty years ago in the late spring of 1995 and MMQ standing for mysterious murder quests aka audience participation murder mysteries).

But this one is special for a couple of reasons.

First, it's in color, which means it was taken *after* the show and was not one of our black and white promotional stills that I usually post.

Second, the guy in the upper right is Darren L, and it may be the one time that he made it all the way to central PA (those who know LVC nightlife might recognize the Underground, which is where this particular show ended).  Darren was a big part of my life back in the Uniontown era, when we worked together in my cousin's theatre company, and he played the role of "older brother" during my late-blooming-development stage (and he *literally* played my older brother in our first show together, Neil Simon's 'Come Blow Your Horn').

According to the search feature of the blog, this is the fifth (and likely the final time) that Darren will appear in my photo flashbacks ... but to put things in perspective, he also did get a shout-out during my bonus series of posts back when the world was supposed to have been ending as one of the three main male influences during the time when I needed that kind of influence the most.

By the way ... as for why I was *in* the trash can for this shot?  Well you're going to have to see the show to solve *that* mystery!

Random Thought for Thursday 5/7/15

Here are 9 Nittany Nuggets from today's game:

1.)  Surprise!  The randomness for today has been taken over by the bonus posts I usually post on game day Saturdays in the fall ...
2.)  Because ... courtesy of the combination of the BTN and a DVR ... I was able to finally watch the Blue-White Game from April.
3.)  Although, thanks to a DVR that's always at capacity, I couldn't record (or watch) it in the old HD, as I prefer to watch sporting events (#firstworldproblems).
4.)  Spoiler alert -- we won!  To that point, it struck me that the "We ARE ... Penn State" chant is never more *literally* true than during this game each year.
5.)  Thanks to the graphic that hit the screen about "key losses" from last year (meaning the players, not the games), I get to say, for one last time, ATTA BOY FICKEN, for making it into the broadcast.
6.)  Speaking of those who once played for the blue and white, hello there Matt McGloin, co-announcer for the game, on loan from Oakland for the day.
7.)  Also -- hello there surfer dude, I mean freshman quarterback, Tommy Stevens.
8.)  AND -- hello there Sandy Barbour, new AD for PSU.  Great interview ... good luck on the job!
9.)  My favorite part of the telecast (I mean, let's face it ... you don't watch this kind of game for the game) was the interview with the new Penn State Lacrosse coach, who said he'd consider "support from just 1/10 of the football fans" as a good thing (#realisticexpectations)

In closing, there are only 121 days left until the new season starts on Sat Sep 5th!  See you then!

SPEAKING OF ATTA BOY FICKEN, GOOD LUCK IN KC!:
http://www.pennlive.com/pennstatefootball/index.ssf/2015/05/former_penn_state_kicker_sam_f_2.html

CAN'T WAIT TO 'PLAY ARMY' ON OCT 3; HOPE BUSTER BLUTH WILL BE THERE:
http://espn.go.com/college-football/team/schedule/_/id/213/penn-state-nittany-lions

WELCOME SANDY BARBOUR:
http://www.gopsusports.com/genrel/sandy_barbour_916711.html

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 5/6/15

Nefarious and contumacious.

Used in a sentence:  "Even at the ripe old age of 43 years, 3 months and 30 days, the geek in me is still excited to expand my vocabulary, which was done recently when I saw the phrase 'nefarious and contumacious' and had to look up the second word."

Sadly, I don't remember the place where I saw it ... (in the Sunday newspaper?  on a 24 hour news channel?  during a Judge Judy episode?) ... but I did have to go edumacate myself pretty quickly so I could sleep that night.

Would that I were a boxer ... I would have named my right and left nefarious and contumacious respectively.

But since I'm not, I can at least file away an adjective to describe myself more colorfully when I get in one of my antidisestablishmentarianistic moods.

MY NEW FAVORITE WORD:
http://www.wordsmith.org/words/contumacious.html

SEEMS LIKE POETS HAVE KNOWN ABOUT CONTUMACIOUS FOR AWHILE NOW:
http://hellopoetry.com/words/176250/contumacious/poems/

THE SOURCE OF MY VOCABULARY EXPANSION IN HIGH SCHOOL:
http://www.amazon.com/Word-Wealth-Ward-S-Miller/dp/003041931X

Random Tune for Tuesday 5/5/15

With Cinco de Mayo falling on a Tuesday ... and Tuesdays being the day when I go seeking a random tune ...

I said to myself, "Self ... who do you think of when you think of music and Mexico?"

The answer ... Mr. Freddy Fender.

So then I said to myself, "Self ... what tune do you think of when you think of Mr. Freddy Fender?"

The answer ... "Until the Next Teardrop Falls".

So *then* I said to myself, "Self ... but Cinco de Mayo is more of a drinking holiday, and although some drunks get sad, isn't there a better song to select?"

The answer ... tonight's random tune ... dedicated to all the drinking folk (and sadly I can't join you this evening but know that I fully intend to defer my fun until a ten day vacation coming up around Memorial Day) ...

So Happy Cinco de Mayo (or Cinco de Miracle Whip if you're whiter than most) to you and yours from me and mine!

THIS MEANS SOMETHING DIFFERENT IN COLORADO:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y3olza6suT8

Random Memorial for Monday 5/4/15

Gone but not forgotten:  thinking that Teller *never* talks.

Because, it turns out, he does!

I mean, sure, I never thought he was a medical mute, and I fully expected that he chatted with friends and family on the sly.  But I assumed that any time he was doing something *in the public eye*, that he'd keep his mouth shut in order to protect the integrity of his performances.

So I was somewhat shocked when I was watching a Houdini documentary on the History channel the other day and heard him speak in interviews (oddly, he sat in the shadows, as if that made it so that the viewer would excuse the shtick-infraction).  By the way, I was also shocked to learn that Houdini died because he let a college kid gut-punch him out of vanity ... but that's another story for another day (or for one of the links to follow/below).

Raymond Joseph Teller's voice, now that I've heard it and so feel somewhat betrayed, will not be forgotten.

OK OK SO HE TALKS *A LOT* APPARENTLY:
http://variety.com/2013/scene/features/teller-sounds-off-1200328939/

THE AFOREMENTIONED DOCUMENTARY WITH SECRETS REVEALED:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=72IBUiXJogc

A GUT PUNCHER HE WAS *BEFORE* ALL THE KIDS WERE DOING IT ON YOUTUBE:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QJ9lNRAjTQM

Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 5/3/15

What southern Florida is talking about this week:

A 1000 foot slip-n-slide set up yesterday in a nearby park.

Would that I had slipped and slid, but alas I did not participate in this fund-raiser for Special Olympics.  So I post this today after learning that this activity travels our country, so that YOU, the reader, can be better prepared than I to engage in this event when it hits your town (look to the link below/that follows for details).

After all, it's summer here year around, but the season is likely just get started where you live ... so why not plan now to escape your day to day pressures and slip and slide your way to happiness ...

GET READY!:
http://www.slidethecity.com/

YESTERDAY'S LOCAL EVENT:
http://www.wsvn.com/story/28962807/hundreds-slide-down-giant-water-slide-in-davie

THE LOCAL EVENT FUNDRAISER'S BENEFICIARY:
https://specialolympicsflorida.org/what-we-do/

Random Soapbox for Saturday 5/2/15

I don't mean to go off on a rant here, but ...

... here's what I *think* I know about the recent developments in Baltimore.

By the way, as I always do of late when weighing in on these types of issues, I use the qualifier *think* before the phrase "I know", because, ironically, there's little that's black and white about the issues of racial inequality between black and white (and the browns ... I'm not trying to forget the browns ... but, let's face it ... they have taken the back burner of late, unless/until immigration reform takes center stage again ...)

AND also because the matured Billy Joel gets it spot-on about how aging has affected my take on things of this nature:

Now with the wisdom of years I try to reason things out
And the only people I fear are those who never have doubts
Save us all from arrogant men, and all the causes they're for
I won't be righteous again
I'm not that sure anymore 

Of course, that means I have to wonder "who am I?" to even offer commentary in the first place.  Sure -- I tend to watch documentaries on PBS during Black History Month (what can I say ... there's just something about the way that Henry Louis Gates, Jr puts things in perspective as a modern day story teller), but I can't speak to what it's like to be faced with the unique challenges and obstacles growing up in a world that constantly reminds you that you are a minority.  I can't relate to having generations that are still alive that can tell tales of a recent time when bigotry and hatred and fear of those unlike you led to uprisings -- some peaceful, some with bloodshed -- all painful.  I don't carry the weight of hundreds of years of unequal treatment on my shoulders.

Basically -- I'm not of that community.  Yes, I know, I know.  We are the world.  We're all in this together.  It takes a village.  The future is color-blind.  I understand the ideals to which we all strive to make a more perfect world.  But I put those goals in the "man's reach should exceed his grasp or what's a heaven for" category ... and I think the string of these hot-button occurrences require us to be grounded a touch more in reality over ideality.

To be consistent with past times I've attempted to process these news stories, I do think the reality of moving forward with a solution does start first within that community.  Which is something Baltimore seems to have in spades (and I'm using that in the classic idiom way, not the urban dictionary way), based on the stories that filtered out once the "shocking riots and fires and looting" photos faded from press coverage.  In my opinion, that's how it *should* be.  Religious leaders, parents, educators, government officials ... working together to keep the potential to slip into complete anarchy to a minimum.  (And I also stand by my frequent chastising of the 24 hour news talking heads, who would do the future a favor by learning to shut the hell up about most matters.  Blathering blowhards across the political spectrum exacerbate issues, and their talking points distract and divert conversation and action away from progress.)

Speaking of which, a pause seems appropriate here to celebrate Toya Graham, and her instinct to slap some sense into her rock-wielding boy ... I *am* of the school that values what the National Guard accomplishes in these scenarios (I'm not beyond them rolling into my home-before-this-one of Chicago once the temperatures warm and the annual killing sprees start there), but I also think we learned that there could be tremendous value in deputizing the slapping mother squadron in future uprisings.

By the way, for balance, let me also say that I understand that the modern day policeperson's job is tremendously stressful, and that a thug culture has taken over many of the youth (and so long as there are "aspirational" figures cloaked in thuggery and hashtags promoting #thuglife, I will reject the notion that the t-word is the new n-word, and continue to use it descriptively as appropriate.  I blame the rising cache of "swagger" that has permeated too many nooks and crannies of everyday life, but that's another post for another day.)  I also applaud the fact that Madame Baltimore Mayor said today that the initiative to bust the rioters and the firestarters and the looters is underway.  I am skeptical of attempts to recast those crimes as free speech and acceptable activity.  In my opinion, we all could use a bit more accountability in our lives, and I'm particular concerned about a youth culture that is quick to play victim or disassociate from their deeds when those actions tend toward the extreme.  (I know, I know ... this old grumpy man thinks videogaming is likely to blame ... shocker, right?)

What I want more than anything -- even the aforementioned SMS (slapping mother squadron) -- is for the discussion to focus on concrete steps that can be taken toward that idealized future.  Where are the specific actionable items?  Let's prioritize funding for police cameras as we did during the "community policing" initiatives in the past.  Let's explore what living wages mean .. and let's find compromise (I know, I know ... that's a dirty word in today's intractable TeaParty vs Liberal political climate) ... because it is compromise that is needed when it comes to welfare reform and prison reform and educational system reform.  Let's stop making all governmental decisions with an eye toward the next political race, and return to the past glory of federalism where states experimented with policy and the best of the best rose to the top to be applied nationwide (instead of the propensity for wallowing in deadlock that has paralyzed progress to kick off this century).

And until that happens, let's use these events as a call to action for each of us to search our souls, to understand our biases, to continue the conversation and to consider how it is to walk in the shoes of others (whether thug, community member trying to rise above, policeperson, government official, or outsider) before rushing to judgment.

Let's engage now or watch our cities burn later.

MLK: "CONSTRUCTIVE SOCIAL CHANGE WILL BRING CERTAIN TRANQUILITY":
http://nursingclio.org/2014/09/16/learning-from-lyndon-how-america-should-respond-to-ferguson/

A DIFFERENT TAKE ON THE SLAPPING MOTHER:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/style/lonnae-oneal-the-baltimore-mom-slaps-her-son-for-the-ages/2015/04/30/5103d25a-ef49-11e4-a55f-38924fca94f9_story.html

ACTION STEP ONE:  EXPLORE BIAS (WHAT IT IS and WHAT IT DOES):
http://www.nationaljournal.com/magazine/beyond-dialogue-what-we-can-do-about-race-and-the-police-20140905

Random Flashback for Friday 5/1/15

In general, I'm not a fan of "favorites" per se.

With enough retrospection, I think that it is easy AND more meaningful to reflect until I find the best parts about anything ... especially when it comes to artistic output.

To be true to myself, that means that I can't officially declare that this is one of my favorite pictures ever taken from the black and white publicity stills we did on my undergrad campus of LVC back in the day two decades ago (which is, of course, when this photo was snapped ... in the late spring of 1995).

[By the way, all credit for all of these photos sprinkled throughout my Friday flashbacks in this blog goes to our "troop" photographer, Robin O, for all of the complimentary work she did multiple times a year.]

All that said, I can (and *WILL*) say that this is one that I really really really really really like.  (What can I say -- doing audience participation murder mysteries is clearly *hard* work ...)