July 31, 2013

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 7/31/13

Dick Trickle.

Used in a sentence (followed by a disclaimer):  "Those are capital letters in the words Dick and Trickle, lest you think I'm going to post about something that sends the male species to their doctor's office."

And the disclaimer -- I wanted to mock that name since I saw the sports page article last week about how Ken Schrader bumped Dick Trickle off of the "oldest pole winner in a NASCAR series" list, but it was only when I went looking for an accompanying google image for tonight's post [WARNING -- make sure you have your "safesearch" feature ON before googling the phrase "dick trickle"], that I learned the Trickle family had more to deal with then just Mr. Trickle losing his record.

Sadly, Dick committed suicide in May of this year (and not because of his name ...).  So ... maybe I shouldn't be making any kind of jokes.  Oops ... Anyone know how to retract a post?

HERE IS THE SOURCE THAT DREW ME TO MOCKERY:
http://espn.go.com/racing/nascar/truck/story/_/id/9507199/ken-schrader-oldest-pole-winner-nascar-series

AND HERE IS WHAT I DISCOVERED THAT GAVE ME SECOND THOUGHTS:
http://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/nascar/2013/05/16/dick-trickle-death-gunshot-2013/2169895/

ALTHOUGH GENTLY MOCKING DEAD FOLKS IS A COTTAGE INDUSTRY:
http://elitedaily.com/news/world/making-fun-dead-people/

July 30, 2013

Random Tune(s) for Tuesday 7/30/13

I am reaching the maximum amount of pop culture that can fill my head, and must soon get rid of some of it.

Proof in point -- we were sitting on the couch and the musical phrasing of "... you're my best friend ..." snuck into my head.

Unable to identify it, we thought that maybe it was from the theme song of "Courtship of Eddie's Father", the Harry Nillson tune #1 below.  But that wasn't it, so then I figured it was the Randy Newman theme song from "Toy Story" that was stuck in my head (tune #2).

Nope -- the mystery was finally solved as it was the final notes of Queen's "You're My Best Friend" (tune #3) ... but that victory was short lived, as this morning, when I was trying to recall tune #3, the only thing that filled my noggin was Garth Brooks' "A Friend to Me" (tune #4).

Oh what a jumble is my brain (not that that's so different from my normal state, come to think of it)!

THOUGHT MAYBE IT WAS THIS:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rCF7Dnov8vA

BUT THEN THOUGHT FOR SURE IT WAS THIS:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LXARdPb4YBs

UNTIL I SOLVED THE MYSTERY THAT IT WAS THIS:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c2JSUXaY-tw

THEN I FORGOT IT BY THE NEXT MORNING AND THOUGHT IT WAS THIS:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pI9eLl-OaYY

July 29, 2013

Random Memorial for Monday 7/29/13

Gone but not forgotten:  summer evenings eating ice cream and risking life and limb on the modified "witch's hat" ancient playground equipment at Woods Creek in Lickdale PA.

Full disclosure #1 -- I didn't know the mechanism was called a "witch's hat" until I started googling the interwebs tonight seeking a picture of it.

Full disclosure #2 -- that is not me in the image there, as I never had that much hair ... nor did I wear knee socks ... nor was I a girl when I was younger.

Full disclosure #3 -- Boy I *think* the place was called Woods Creek, but I could *not* confirm that in my googling tonight -- instead just finding the modern day restaurant at the link below.

Full disclosure #4 -- I really like googling.

I thought of this place because I recently saw a post that said the aforementioned restaurant was closing, and then I started thinking about how frequently we would visit the outdoor playground/ice cream place in the summer (I guess it was the poor person's Jigger Shop, for those of you familiar with Lebanon PA ice cream economics).  The best part was finishing the ice cream and still having time to go to the 1940's style playground with death-defying equipment on it.  I remember pushing the limits of the modified "witch's hat", either spinning it so fast that the chains would get caught up on each other and break speed records unwinding or pushing it side to side with a goal to smash someone's shins against the inner pole (you know, just kids being kids).

The other reason we might have visited often was because the small country church down the road was where we spent a good bit of time in my pre-runaway years (the preacher there was my father's fourth wife's ex-boyfriend/my father's fifth wife's ex-husband [ ...the latter coupling just being a spite-marriage to address the fact that the fourth wife seemed to be a little too supportive of her ex-boyfriend's new church {what?  never heard of a spite marriage?  I thought all families had those ...}])

Regardless of what brought us to the establishment, the combination of ice cream treats AND dangerous playgrounding, you are missed!

THIS WAS WHAT I FOUND INSTEAD:
http://www.woodscreekgrill.com/events/

IT WAS CLOSE TO THIS -- WHICH HAS APPARENTLY BEEN RENAMED:
http://www.lickdalecampground.com/

THE BITTER OLD BITCH GETS IT!:
http://tstbob.blogspot.com/2009/12/walk-down-memory-lane-to-dangerous.html






July 28, 2013

Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 7/28/13

What Chicago is talking about this week:

The coldest day ever!  Well -- the coldest day ever in summer!  Well -- the coldest day ever in summer in the last thirty years!

I was going to go to the beach today,  but I had already packed away the accoutrements I would have needed (hat, gloves, scarves) -- plus, I had to work -- but since the Chicago beach has wireless now, I guess I could have overcome the technical issue if I could also have addressed the frigidity issue.

Of course, everything is relative -- so the cold front might make overnight lows tonight in the low 40's (which, for July, is a record), but we're still not talking about shocking the ecosystem too drastically (as a warming spell immediately follows these three days of chill).  Look -- it's Chicago.  Look again (as in, do a double take?) and you don't have to be the progeny of Tom Skilling to understand this (really, though, we all do feel like he's "meteorological" family) but sometimes the winds comes from the south -- and they're warm -- and sometimes they come from the north -- and they're not so warm.

So pull out the afghans and cuddle up with loved ones on the couch and heat up the hot chocolate (and cover up the damn tomatoes) ... and we can get through this calamity together!

[And, if you can spare the time, do something dramatic, because that way you can start the story you tell your grandkids with ... "No one had ever experienced the chill in the air that July in Chitown like we did, and that was the day that ..."  Come on -- you get the point.  The situation practically begs you to do something (note to self:  check birth rates in Chicago in late April 2014 ... just a hunch ...)]

THE WEATHER BLOG SAYS THERE ARE MORE OSCILLATIONS TO COME:
http://blog.chicagoweathercenter.com/2013/07/27/another-autumn-like-day-before-temperatures-recover/

IT WAS WARMER IN DEC 2012 THAN IT IS IN JULY 2013:
http://articles.chicagotribune.com/2012-12-04/news/ct-met-warm-winter-weather-20121204_1_temperature-o-hare-international-airport-national-weather-service

WHILE WE'RE ON THE SUBJECT OF SUMMER AND COLD:
http://www.dummies.com/how-to/content/how-to-treat-summer-colds.html


July 27, 2013

Random Soapbox for Saturday 7/27/13

Something different for me ... for the first time ever on my blog, I turn my weekly rant over to a guest speaker , allowing her to take over my soapbox.  And although I am copying this in its entirety, please check this link to leave your comments for the  author,  Holly Antony ...

Immigration's Epic Fail

When I was a child I used to listen to the Neil Diamond song “America” all the time.  It always made me swell with pride that I lived in the country where everyone wanted to be. It made me think about how lucky I was to be born here where I was free and how others weren't so lucky.  It also made me imagine my ancestors and how they felt as they stepped foot on this free land for the very first time.  As they stood in the mighty shadow of Ellis Island, awaiting their chance, wondering what this new life would hold for them.  How that must have felt to be…as Herman Melville put it…”a thousand noble currents all pouring into one”.  To arrive on its shores with nothing but the clothes on their back and a hope for a new life…a life that I was blessed to have as my birthright because of the braveness of those people who came before me.  Over the course of my life I have been witness to many amazing people who were as brave, maybe more so, than my own ancestors.  People from all over the world coming here for a better life to contribute positively to our society.  These people stood out to me against the canvas of my small town because they were different.

A few years ago someone I had come to know wrote down a short thank you note to his friends and on it the poignant words of his struggle to get to where he was.  “26 years ago, under the cover of darkness, I covertly stepped onto a 30 foot long boat with a small diesel engine along with 38 other Vietnamese boat people.  We were escaping from the Vietnamese Communist regime.  We spent 12 hours wandering in the South Sea of China under storm.  We fought with the angry sea, the same sea that would bury my younger brothers a few years later. We then floated under the hot and sultry sun for 3 days.  We were thirsty and hungry, a glimmer of hope to survive and live in a free country was the only thing we hung onto while facing death…”  His boat was one of the few that actually made it to the shore.  When I read his story written out like that it affected me to the point of tears imagining what he must have gone through.  His story, both heartbreaking and yet triumphant…a story of survival and sheer will to have a better life at all costs and the risk of the greatest sacrifice of all…your own life.  It is what is at the heart of his story that is what I think of when I think about immigration. 

My first memories of immigration were of a family in my neighborhood as a young child. For years the quiet of my neighborhood was always disturbed by the government housing that popped up on our doorstep.  Crime and multiple generation welfare recipients mooching off the system, taking everything and giving back nothing.  But these were not immigrants. They were US citizens born and raised.  At the least end were the lazy and at the most were the thieves and criminals.  One day the unit next to our house opened up and we saw a family moving in with 2 small children.  They seemed to have nothing and were quite different from the others there. They were from Vietnam and had escaped the atrocities of their own country and had come here seeking freedom and a better life.  My father, being a Vietnam Vet was sympathetic to his story of survival and our family took them under our wing.  My mother would spend her days teaching the wife how to speak English and in return she would cook us amazing meals from her homeland. Not because we asked her to but because it was not of their character to take things and be less than grateful and to show that gratitude in any way they could.  I remember her making a beautiful hand sewn pillow for my mom to thank her for her kindness.  They had very little yet they gave all they had to offer in gratitude for what they received.  They were the hardest working people I have ever seen wanting nothing but a life here free of the persecution of a place they once called home.  Getting factory jobs, my father saw them being taken advantage of by a corrupt and unethical businessman who got away with paying them a pittance for their work.  He felt helpless to see them treated like that at the hands of wealthy unconscionable scum but for them it was work and it was “fair” in their eyes.  Luckily, within a few short months they were blessed to get jobs in another state and moved there into a house of their own where they could finally live their humble American dream.  Upon their entry into our country they had been placed in the government housing near us only as a transition into their new life as contributing citizens of our country.  The process for them was smooth and nurturing which was a welcome blessing to people who had been so wrongfully treated in their own country.  That was the first time I saw our welfare system in a new light.  To be a hand up and not a hand out…not like the litany of lifers as I liked to call them who had no ambition or desire to contribute to our society.  And sadly I believe that is how most people view immigrants.  That they are all here to mooch off the system and steal our jobs (which by the way can’t happen simultaneously…).  I recognize that for some all they know of immigration is what the media has shown them…lumping everyone into the same category.  I am sure you have seen the recent events on the news where immigrants were referred to as nothing but drug mules.  That is the kind of false hype and plain ignorance that stirs the pot and builds a misrepresentation of an entire group of people.  But for me, immigration has a different face.  Because the immigrants I have come to know in my life are people worthy of being called Americans and more importantly people who have taught me a great deal about what it means to sacrifice one life with the uncertainty of obtaining another.

But now I have come face to face with the devastation that our broken immigration system is causing in the lives of so many people and I can no longer remain silent watching this travesty from the side lines.  It is time America gets a glimpse into what’s ACTUALLY going on behind the curtain of our immigration system.  It is time that we stand together to make this right before one more family’s lives are destroyed at the hands of this bureaucratic boondoggle.  This time, the fight has been brought to my doorstep and I have chosen to stand up as an American and not back down from this battle.  I will now shine the light into the dark seedy underworld of our immigration system so that many may seek to stand with me…for my friends, for our country.  This is their story as I have come to bear witness. 

She was 5 years old playing in the driveway of the home next to the empty plot of land my husband and I had just purchased.  We had just laid a foundation for our new home and came to see the progress.  We stepped from our car and were greeted by happy smiling neighbors gathered in her yard having a barbecue.  They introduced themselves and we shook hands and so was the beginning of a wonderful 13 years with the security of having decent and kind neighbors and friends.   Rachael was a single mom seeking a new life for her and her young daughter far from the pain of a difficult divorce back in England.  Her parents were already here and had their green cards.  They had made their lives here and welcomed and gladly sponsored their daughter and granddaughter on their new path.  Upstanding citizens and successful business owners her parents who dedicated a great deal of their time to volunteering in the community are now the driving force behind a charity that feeds the hungry children of our county called First Friday kids Support Group.  Just like her parents Rachael was a solid salt-of-the-earth person who always gave of herself but never once took anything from the system.  She always paid her own way and worked hard to give her daughter the best life she could.  We got to watch Lauren grow up into a beautiful talented independent young adult thriving in this new life she was given.  She constantly excelled at everything she did including starting her first website at the young age of 14.  She is probably the smartest and most ambitious young lady I have ever had the pleasure to know.  Then, this past spring, all these years later, graduating with honors and in the top 10% of her class holding a 4.38 GPA.  But her life has always been in the dark shadow of her immigration status.  Simple things like being unable to get her driver’s license when she turned 16 like all her friends became impossible.  This broken process robbed her of what should have been a special milestone in every child’s life.   Both her and her mom became all but prisoners in their own home waiting for the system to approve their green card status.  They were unable to travel anywhere or even take a simple vacation.  But Lauren pushed through all of that with a smile knowing that soon she would be over the hump and all would be made right.  She focused on the bigger picture…her graduation and dreams of college.  Excelling far beyond her counterparts Lauren should have been a shoe in for any college but she chose FSU even turning down a scholarship to another school.   It was the school she knew she wanted to go to and then being awarded a Bright Futures Scholarship her future was looking up.  Until she began the process of enrolling in school and found how difficult it would be with no social security number, no access to grants or loans which she desperately needed.  But that was the least of her worries because before that could take its toll the letter arrived from the Immigration department rescinding her mom’s green card and denying her status, forever ending her dreams of not only attending college but now of even staying in the country…the country that is her HOME, the only country she has ever known.  Her story will shock you and what I am about to tell you is how they got to this place and only a not-so-brief summary of the horrors our system has bestowed upon them. This chronology is only SOME of the chaos and unending buffoonery that this family has endured.  Not knowing much about the actual immigration process myself I have poured over countless documents from Rachael’s files trying to understand all of this and piece together the sheer mess that our government has made for them.

Coming here to Florida in 2000 Rachael and Lauren began their lives in America on an E2 Visa status and hopeful for the future ability to get their green cards and eventual naturalization.  They believed this would be their new home forever and returning to England was never a thought.  The sheer corruption of the whole process was revealed to them very early when they inquired about green card status and they were told her parents could not sponsor them until they were naturalized. This proved to be a one of many false statements over the course of the following long years.   So they decided to file for a 5 year E2 Visa.  To assure it was done correctly she chose to use an immigration consultant (who misrepresented himself as a lawyer) who told her if she paid him an additional $1000 he would be able to expedite the process but nothing happened.  She went back and he told her she would have to pay ANOTHER $1000.  When still nothing happened she did some research and found out that he had filed NOTHING on her behalf (yet he was fast to take the $2000 which she did not get back!) She had to go in and demand he hand over the paperwork to her to file.  He told her she couldn't do it herself which turned out to be a lie because she DID file it herself and it was approved.  After renewing their E2 Visa for 5 years they were informed that they could INDEED get green cards with the sponsorship of her parents so even though they had just gotten their 5 year Visa they began the green card process filing at I-130 within the year.  This left an absurd FOUR YEARS of legal Visa status for the government to complete the green card process. Being told the process would take only a MAXIMUM of 2 years they felt they were more than clear and would have green cards for SURE by the end of the Visa status.  Unfortunately the process languished on and on with a virtual unending litany of ridiculous mistakes (ALL on the part of the immigration dept.) resulting in almost constant trips to the Immigration office in Tampa, FL (an hour and half drive from our home).  Trips that for immigrants can result in possible waits of hours in a room where you cannot eat, drink (try that one diabetics!) or (conveniently) use any electronics.  They are searched upon entry to the office and can even been denied entry to the office itself to ask questions which has happened to Rachael!  This feet-dragging slow-playing poppycock became a constant in their lives. Every day was filled with the ridiculous boondoggle of the USCIS.  This also includes but is not limited to the constant filling out of the WRONG forms.  These forms are given to them by the agents.  It’s not like they “chose” the wrong forms…they were given them and told that is what they needed to fill out!  And they filled them out…all of them, every time.  This, along with a barrage of unending fees, would lead to more fees and more forms and still more fees with seemingly no end. Not to mention the abhorrent treatment by the “officers” and staff including yelling and belittling along with being asked demeaning questions as part of the supposed “process”.  I find it interesting that no one can bring in electronics because in my opinion this is a way that they can avoid any of their despicable behavior being taped or any of their lies and misinformation being on record.  To me a government office like that should be transparent and on the record ALWAYS like a court of law and not like it is now which is in effect its own police state devoid of accountability where people can be treated like animals and have no recourse because they are desperate to have their status approved. The great majority of the staff at these facilities is at best lazy, overwhelmed and uneducated about the process and at the worst incompetent power hungry tyrants who just enjoy lording themselves over people they consider to be smaller than themselves.  The few who are kind and seem to sincerely want to help are not trained or knowledgeable enough about the endless bureaucratic stream of paperwork and forms to perform their jobs efficiently and effectively or given the power to fix things when they are wrong.  This can often mean that issues can be handed off to people who have no connection to the problem, nor understand or care about it, often even being in other states!  They were even once given a form and told it was “new” and they “didn’t really know much about it” but she was to fill it out! Are you kidding me??  Maybe before a form is released for use the staff SHOULD know about it and know what it does and what it’s for! This isn’t a car wash!  This is people’s lives!  And maybe while they are at it they could gather up some actual ENGLISH speaking employees!  I realize it is the IMMIGRATION dept. but really?   You should at least make sure your employees are functionally able to speak the English language.   There are actually people who are immigrants who DO speak English.  And at best I am not even sure how employees of the USCIS that don’t have a functional use of the language can even begin to understand the process in front of them!  I am college educated and had problems reading over everything!!  There is no way you can convince me that someone who does not have a functional use of the language should be in a position to comprehend the endless forms and fees and then be able to explain that to immigrants (most of whom DON’T speak much English) in a comprehensive and accurate way!

But the real down fall for Rachael in this process was what occurred as she approached the end of her legal 5 year E2 Visa status.  Obviously the 2 year maximum to get her green card was a joke. After YEARS of waiting and jumping through every hoop, some multiple times, they were in fear of their 5 year E2 Visa expiring and still not having the green card.  She was told twice by agents at the USCIS that once she applied for the I-130 and it was accepted (which occurred when she still had 4 years left on the Visa…July of 2005) she was in the system and it didn't matter if her Visa expired.  Rachael was uncomfortable with that and decided that she would go to the office to inquire about what to do well in advance of its expiration.  She was denied admittance to the facility in Tampa saying her “Visa is still good, go home”.  This is a perfect example of how proactive she was ALWAYS about doing the right thing and how she went above and beyond trying to just do what was asked of her but was constantly up against a system that was broken deep into its core.  As more time passed she got even more uneasy.  She then tried the USCIS office in Orlando and was told that she could apply for an extension to her Visa for “safety”.  For her peace of mind she paid the $1200 and filed for the extension for the 5 year E2 and work permit.  This came back DENIED. When she went to inquire why she was denied they told her that she had failed to provide a document which had been written on the BACK of one of the forms (all forms are usually front side only and stapled).  AND it was a double redundancy item which they could clearly see in the other documents she provided but she apologized for missing that ONE item and said she would gladly provide it and was then told that she only gets ONE CHANCE and she screwed up.  (Really?? Because it seems to me that the USCIS screws up pretty much consistently and THEY are allowed MULTIPLE tries to get it right!! Often not getting it right at ALL!!)  She was yelled at by an agent in the Orlando office in broken English (because apparently the majority of workers at the immigration office appear speak little English and most of which you can’t even understand).  This man (and I use that word LOOSELY) yelled at her something like “You Illegal.  You understand that?  You ILLEGAL.  You get out of country now!!  You ILLEGAL!”  in front of the entire room of people!!  How humiliating! And to yell that at a woman and her child?  What is wrong with these people?  They both left in tears and decided to go to the office in Tampa with her father where she was assured that it didn't matter because she was still in the system for the green card and she would get it soon. They continued to plug along slowly with the I-130 process at this point, always having to chase after people and push to get things moving.  They were then asked to fill out yet another form (I-485 for permanent resident status for another $1010).  The agent who gave her the form gave her 1 form and told her the one amount to pay and it asked for dependents so since Lauren was a dependent Rachael had no reason to question this.  After filing this form Rachael received 2 letters in the mail for her to proceed with bio-metrics.  Both had HER name on them but she assumed that one was for Lauren but in her name since she was the mother. When they showed up for the bio-metrics she was told the one letter was just a duplicate and sent in error (surprise) and Lauren was not in their system! Upon returning home she called and spoke to a seemingly very helpful and kind woman on the phone from USCIS who told her that because Lauren was now over 14 years of age she would need to file her own I-145 so the form she THOUGHT was for both of them in fact only covered HER.  (again not HER mistake.  The agent should have given her the 2 forms but probably didn't know enough about what he was asking her to do). Rachael immediately filled out the form for Lauren and sent another check for $1010 which was returned to them saying they did not include enough payment as the rate had gone up since she paid for hers!  So they wrote ANOTHER check (this time for $1070).  Again more delays but they were assured it was all clerical and would be rectified.  So Rachael’s process began moving along and eventually she was approved for her green card (April 27, 2011) but at the final interview was told she was approved but would have to wait for the actual card until a number became available since her previous Visa has lapsed.  He even went to check with his supervisors before he approved her saying that he wanted to double check that everything was ok with that because he wasn't sure.  But he returned and said all was fine and she was approved! He even offered her the option to fill out ANOTHER form that would enable her to travel…for more money of course (since without a valid Visa at this point she was unable to go anywhere) which she declined since her daughter would still be unable to travel as she was STILL awaiting her green card interview.  (Rachael’s actual card in this case was not issued until August of 2012! That is over a year after she was approved!) This, however, gave them hope that it would not be long until Lauren was also given status. But again the process for Lauren was lagging way behind.  Due to the constant delays in paperwork they actually had to do redo Lauren’s medical screening (to the tune of hundreds of dollars) because the one she had done “expired” while the USCIS took their sweet time.  But eventually AFTER ANOTHER YEAR AND A HALF of screwing around she too completed the process and had her interview (January 7, 2013…only months before her high school graduation which meant that from Kindergarten to graduation Lauren was just as much a citizen here as any of our children!) Note here that the supposed 2 year process that they applied for in 2005 (that is NOT a typo) took almost 8 years to complete!!!  Unacceptable!!  But all of that washed away as Lauren sat at the desk and took her oath and was welcomed to our country.  Being handed her approval papers she finally felt a sense of relief.  After all these years she was going to be able to enjoy all the privileges of her friends…apply for a driver’s license, start applying for college scholarships.  Before leaving, Rachael asked just out of curiosity if the officer could shed some light on exactly why their claims were separated since they are mother and daughter.  This is where her real nightmare began.  The woman looked at her computer screen and then raced out of the room.  Upon her return she took back the paperwork from Lauren!!  She said that there was a minor problem but it was just about “dotting the ‘i’s and crossing the ‘t’s and nothing to worry about”  They said they just wanted to put them together so that they could enjoy the benefit of naturalization together someday.  Even though Rachael thought this unnecessary they seemed unwilling to do it any other way.  But they assured them that it would all be taken care of and it would just take a bit longer…5 days in fact.  18 days later Rachael’s father wrote a letter inquiring what was going on with the process (since they had been told it would be rectified in 5 days and 18 days is almost 4 times that!) Shortly after that, Rachael received a letter from them in the mail with the intent to RESCIND HER green card and deny Lauren’s application!! I would like to tell you for sure what their claims with this were but it is difficult to decipher all the legal jargon and wade through the unending pages of pure horse manure to get to the truth.  What can be surmised is that they claim there was a lapse in her legal status after the E2 extension was denied.  Yet another lawyer said it is her guess (since that is all they have as the USCIS is very careful to never admit their own fault on paper!) that what actually is happening is that because the I-130 and the request for extension were in the system at the same time it appears that she is committing fraud!!  WHAT???  Because she wanted to make sure her legal status was not interrupted??? THEIR agents told her to do that! Every form she filed was at THEIR hands and THEIR request! And she had to conveniently pay fees to do it and I didn't hear anyone complaining about cashing her checks! These are not the actions of someone who was seeking to DEFRAUD the US government.  These were the actions of a mother trying to do what is right for her child and her LEGALLY!  It was about a group of untrained, ill-mannered, couldn’t-care-less, do-nothings that put her in this position!  I find it interesting that people who are getting married to someone they have known for 2 days on the INTERNET are allowed to bring over their NEW BRIDES from other countries no questions asked and get them green cards and then divorce months later as free and legal citizens actually ARE committing fraud but that is OK!  Do you know that Rachael was told numerous times during this process to just “get married” AND to marry off LAUREN (who was a CHILD!!!!) and that would secure their residency!?  Do you know that she was told of ways to “buy” her green card…for example…putting $10,000 cash into a doughnut shop bag in a certain location and her green card would magically appear??! She was constantly told of unscrupulous charlatans that would make this all go away. Yet Rachael chose none of those options.  She wanted to be a LEGAL citizen of this country and never considered not going by the book.  Well the BOOK is poorly written and even more poorly read my friends!  So after this blow of the ‘Intent to Rescind’ letter Rachael was devastated.  Horrified by this turn of events, they inquired what they could do to fight this and were told that for yet MORE money they could file an appeal within 30 days!  They did that and put together a HUGE packet detailing the mistakes and egregious errors that the USCIS had made through the entire process, all her detailed information and letters from friends and family set in a HUGE 3 ring binder complete with summary and colored tabs to direct anyone who wanted to look very clear access to EVERYTHING.  But when the package arrived at the USCIS, they removed and CASHED the check, then pulled everything that was neatly organized from her binder, crammed it in an envelope and returned it to her a jumbled mess saying they couldn't process it because there was “no notice of denial in their system”  WHAT???  Again they had no problem cashing that check as fast as it hit their hot little hands, before even checking her status!!  At that point Rachael’s father who was the petitioner went to Tampa and scheduled a meeting where he was told that OOPS it WAS in the system “somewhere” but it had not reached THEIR office yet.  This is another example of one hand not knowing what the other is doing!!  So they RESUBMITTED all the papers for the appeal.  They were told that they can see all the errors that were made and that they can see they are a good family and decent people hopefully their superiors would have empathy for their situation as they do.  They were told it would take 30 days for the appeal.  Last week after 113 days…almost 4 times what it should have taken (and they sure as hell weren't going over their documents with a fine tooth comb because no one could look at the absolute absurdities and not realize a terrible mistake has been made!!) their appeal was DENIED, Rachael’s green card was rescinded leaving them now as illegal aliens eligible for deportation from our country.  Anyone with a bit of common sense and a brain can discern that what has occurred here is nothing short of a travesty.

I always hear people talk about Immigration Reform and I really don’t know what they mean by that.  To some people “reform” means closing our borders to any one from another country who wants to come here for a better life and even deporting those who are already here. That is an absurd and selfish concept to me.  Unless you are of Native American descent your lineage is NOT that of this country.  At some point your ancestors came here to this country seeking a better life in some way, shape or form.  You have NO right to deny a better life to anyone because you have been allowed the precious gift of freedom yourself even if it was at the hands of your ancestors.  When I first moved to Florida I had a neighbor who had emigrated from Russia.  Born on the 4th of July in the former Soviet Union he was an inspiration to all who met him.  He had written a beautiful letter about his experiences growing up under the Communist regime and then transitioning into perestroika and all the chaos that came with that process.  He was an eloquent writer and of the many things I took from his journey one really stands out to me now…”The years I have spent in America have strengthened my conviction that this is the country of my future.  We cannot choose the country of our birth just as we cannot choose our parents. I will neither forget nor disavow my country and the people who are dear to me, but I am prepared for my new life in America.  It is my destiny”.   As with all my immigrant friends over the years I have come to feel humbled in their presence.   They did not choose to be born into their country, as WE have not CHOSEN to be born into OURS, but they did choose to fight for more in a new one…THIS one.  They chose to give up everything they knew to be born again into a new life here in our country. 

I have never felt threatened by immigration or worried an immigrant would “steal” my job.  A candle does not diminish its light by lighting another candle.  This country is to be shared and I share it proudly with anyone who is willing to work hard and be my equal.  I have heard people point at the dirty men picking oranges in the fields near my house and say horrible things about them being job thieves.  REALLY?  Because you wanted so badly to PICK ORANGES for a career???  Then I hear that because these immigrants will work for cheap wages and we won’t, they will get hired over us.  But then in the same breath I hear how they are lazy moochers.  I am pretty sure the people in those fields dirty and covered in scratches working long hard hours traveling where the work is are neither lazy nor moochers.  They are people who want a better life than they had.  A safer life.  I think possibly immigrants appreciate our country in a way we never can.  It is through their eyes that we can see the desperation of need.  We don’t have that in our eyes because we have been born into those gifts.  We should bow our own heads in embarrassment for even thinking such thoughts of people we don’t even know…whose “stories” we have made up in our own heads to suit our purposes.  Oh there are the bad seeds.  Do not get me wrong.  I recognize that along with this broken system comes corruption and greed and there are those who have come about their place here wrongly.  But it is not ALL of them.  It is not the poor field workers who struggle to make what is not even a living wage doing jobs that are hard and back breaking.  It is the ones who live 15 in a house stealing their neighbors cable and all collecting welfare, food stamps and free medical care that we should be concerned with.  NOT those who are working to support themselves and live an honest life.  Do you know that Rachael and her daughter have NEVER had or been in any way entitled to healthcare even through her job?  If they needed a doctor they paid…full price.  So it is a myth and farce that all the aliens are just being handed everything.  Rachael has been handed nothing and she has taken nothing.  Yet she is the one we don’t see.  She is the REAL face of immigration here. 

I remember when I was young being told this was a melting pot and that I lived in the greatest nation in the world.  One where people from any country would be proud to call home. Now I am not even proud to call it home.  I am embarrassed at how we behave and how we allow these atrocities to continue and all because it doesn't really affect us right?  I mean if you were born here then who cares about these people who weren't, right?  They should just all go back where they came from and who the hell cares what happens to them, right?  WRONG.  Where has our human compassion gone???  This land is a tapestry made up of millions of tiny threads of all different colors and the more colors the better.  If we all contribute to that canvas with our gifts and talents what a beautiful world this could be.  No one “owns” this country.  It is a country by the people, for the people.  ALL people.  Good, decent people.  And for those bad apples that are spoiling it then it is THOSE we cast out.  It is not the people who are going through this process legally that are the problem.  It is the people who are using the vastness of the corruption of this system to work it for their own gain.  That includes the immigrants, the lawyers, the consultants and the USCIS itself all the way down to the core of this fractured organization.  It is the unscrupulous, unfeeling lowlife scum that take advantage of the loopholes and vulnerability in the system that are the problem. It is the people who work outside the law with those who are impervious to it who are making a mockery of this system.  It is the deep rotted innards of the carcass that is our immigration department that foul and sully the process.  It is NOT the good, kind, hard-working decent people of this world that are only asking for a chance at a new life.  Just as OUR ancestors once did.  What if YOUR ancestors were turned away?  What if no one stood up for them?  What would have become of them…and subsequently you?

This is nothing that a tiny bit of common sense can’t fix.  Surely we should be able to look at the paperwork of a woman and her child and see their longstanding history with this country.  Surely we can see that at no point did she hide her existence from the agency.  She was always vocal and upfront about where she was and what she was doing even going to exceptional lengths to make things legal and right.  They checked their status numerous times a WEEK during the entire process! Surely we can see there on paper that she paid all their fees, filled out all their ridiculous forms, hid NOTHING from them.  She resisted all the illegalities that were suggested to her by these supposed upholders of the law to make sure she was doing this by the book.  Yet we cast HER aside.  While those who have bought their way into a green card through illegal means or fake weddings manage to squeeze our system like a grapefruit for all they can get living off the backs of the people.  And THOSE are the stories we hear.  Those are the stories that have stripped us of our compassion as a united people.  It is NOT the stories of good people who are as much citizens and we are, going through what is a pathetic excuse for a process. Those are the stories people NEED to hear.  It is stories like Rachael and Lauren’s and like my other friends that should be at the forefront of this fight.  It is THOSE stories that should unite us and burn a fire under us.  It is THOSE stories that should reignite the passion of what this country stands for…what it was built upon.  It should raise up that foundation under our feet and allow us to stand strong for each other…for our nation…for our HUMANITY!!

Nothing that can ever be done can make immigration a perfect process but it can be repaired.  In my eyes those repairs start with a total strip down of the system and that includes proper and thorough training of employees, a simplified process that everyone can understand not filled with pages of legal jargon that even a college educated person can’t deconstruct.  It means cleaning house of the entire Immigration Department.  Those that want to learn and be a positive force can do so and the rest should be fired…cast out as those that have come to them begging for rights have been at THEIR hands.  The lawyers and consultants should be investigated and held accountable for the lies and money schemes and no longer be able to use their privilege and standing to circumvent the law for their own financial gain.  In fact there should be a whole department that does nothing but expose corruption from every angle and weed out the true illegals and by that I don’t mean everyone with no current status.  I mean the people who have come about their status by illegal means and shortcuts. The days of allowing the rampant corruption and abuse of this Dystopia need to be over.  But I believe that true reform will come only at the hands of this country’s citizens requesting…no DEMANDING…a complete overhaul of the entire immigration system.  But that does not mean slamming our borders shut and kicking out the people who have become a solid part of this country.  THOSE immigrants embody the true essence of what an American is in my eyes.  What our ancestors intended America to be.  A great land made up of people from all over bringing to the table their unique talents and gifts to build a stronger more solid society…to make us all more worldly, more compassionate…to restore our country to the once great and powerful world leader it once was.
  
At the end of the song “America” the word ‘today’ is repeated…”they’re coming to America…today”  and each time the word is spoken it gets softer and softer until it is merely a whisper exasperated against the softness of the song.  Sadly I think that is what has happened with immigration.  Its triumphant uplifting passionate cry is being drown out to a whisper by a process that is broken and people who seek to defraud.  It is all that is left for the honest, good-hearted and genuine people who come here seeking only the chance to contribute and grow and prosper.  It is up to us…those with common sense…those of us with courage in our spirits and bravery in our souls to stand up and make sure that ‘Today’ is lifted up and shouted clearly and never again reduced to a whisper.    


July 26, 2013

Random Flashback for Friday 7/26/13

Normally, my flashback on Friday is just one picture from twenty years ago (so ... the summer of 1993), but today, it's three photos, because that seems to be the only fair way to pictorially represent the old Dunbar watering hole.

And can I just start by saying that I absolutely love that, in my past, I have stories that involve something called "the old Dunbar watering hole".  Thanks to the high school class in the Uniontown area (where I was living at the time), I was brought into the "inner circle", and became privy to the dirt path (with huge gullies in the road after it rained), and knew exactly where to park around which turn in order to go back through the woods to find it.

The first photo -- that's from the top looking over the edge (where once I jumped off, even though I didn't know how to swim -- just because all the cool kids were doing it and I trusted they would save me.  [Which they did, but it was almost a disaster as they say that the top half of my body moved, but the bottom half practically stood still as I "jumped" -- putting me dangerously close to the rocks.])  The second photo is also from the top -- but this time looking to the other side of the old Dunbar watering hole (so you can get a sense of perspective as to how high it really was).  And the third photo -- well that's my sister and her kids, whom you can barely see in the second photo and whom I took (along with my moms) to said hole when they were visiting on the way to the social event of that summer (more to come on that next week).

By the way, the old Dunbar watering hole will also make another appearance in this series in a few months (which, if you do your math, means a winter time set of photos -- and a true life story to accompany them).  But that's a flashback for another Friday ...


July 25, 2013

Random Thought for Thursday 7/25/13

So ... I've been living with a secret.  Although those that know me best  can't possibly be surprised because they know how I spend my time.   But I think the tide has turned due to recent developments, so I feel comfortable sharing my news.

I regularly watch (and even enjoy) Honey Boo Boo.  I know -- I know -- there are some who say that she (and her show) represent the end of civilization.  I don't mean to upset any elitists who might chastise me for supporting the media consumption of a family that conducts themselves in the manner that is broadcast (well -- cablecast) every week.

But you know what?  The key word in that last sentence is FAMILY.  Despite the activity that the show is redneckinizing (by the way, one of the best/funniest parts of this show is the *attempt* to provide closed captioning), it is clear at its core that the FAMILY loves and supports each other.

Maybe it's that I am the same age as Sugar Bear ... or that I once lived in front of the railroad tracks (the house in which I spent a good bit of time in my hometown of Lebanon had a crick and a parking lot and big somewhat abandoned buildings leftover from a twentieth century industrial complex between my bedroom and the train tracks -- but I still heard the whistle loud and clear on many an occasion) ... but either way, I'm enjoying myself and this season.  I particularly enjoy the six fingered baby, who seems to be pleading with the camera man to make sense of her surroundings in the shots if you focus on her off to the side.

All that said, I anticipate the "very special episode" when many of the family members learn that "sugar" is not just the first name of the nickname for Mama June's most recent baby daddy -- but is also a nickname for the diabetes that is bound to visit this family in due time (the family diet does leave something to be desired) ... but until that time, it's just laugh-out-loud fun.  And I'm not ashamed to be proud of my viewing habits.

Let the judgment begin ...

PERHAPS THE DIABETES HAS ALREADY STARTED:
http://www.dumbdouches.com/honey-boo-boo-forklift-foot/

IT IS NOT THE END OF CIVILIZATION:
http://www.tlc.com/tv-shows/here-comes-honey-boo-boo/about-the-show/about-here-comes-honey-boo-boo.htm

OK ... OK ... DIABETES IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER:
http://www.diabetes.org/


July 24, 2013

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 7/24/13

Masculine Head Nod.

As featured in an excerpt from my ongoing Lorem Ipsum short story (Chapter 3 has been added to the photo album version on Facebook and to the link on the right hand menu of this blog that takes the reader to the completed chapters -- 4 and 5 are also finished and will be added soon):

"If only I had chosen a different major, I would have loved to explore the masculine communication method known as the head nod -- not to sound all sexist -- but just to recognize that the male gender, over time, seems to have taken that motion and perfected it to nonverbally message so much to the person at whom he was nodding.  Actual translation, of course, is always dependent on three factors -- the contextual situation,  the level of familiarity between nodder and noddee and whether the nod itself occurs by sticking the chin up-and-out or down-and-in.

In this case, I was clearly communicating -- 'Ok, big boy, time for you to step in here and evaluate whether this fool should be thrown out.  Oh -- and I got your back, to the extent that you're twice my size and so would really just need someone to lurk in the background with imaginary lat syndrome.'  By the way, imaginary lat syndrome is the biological phenomenon that results in 'puffed chest', in case you were unaware of the medical definition.

Of course, that's what I *thought* I was communicating.  For all I know, Mario saw the movement and thought that I was twitching and might be someone to watch to make sure I didn't have a seizure.  Without verbal communication and since our level of familiarity was relatively low (he had only served me two drinks so far), one never knows what one is communicating with absolute certainty."

DIRECT LINK TO THE PHOTO ALBUM VERSION:
https://www.facebook.com/troy.neidermyer/media_set?set=a.4256647034768.1073741826.1843633569&type=3

DIRECT LINK TO THE BLOG VERSION:
http://capcognition.blogspot.com/search/label/Lorem%20Ipsum%3A%20%20The%20Aloysius%20Angelasia%20Archives%20COMPLETED%20CHAPTERS

July 23, 2013

Random Tune for Tuesday 7/23/13

It's time for me to again embrace the random.

My original intent for tonight was to find a tune that included the singer PitBull -- which I figured would be an easy task, as he's pop-ubiquitous right now -- but first I went looking for an image to use to accompany the post (thanks again, google, for providing images for us all to use and for informing us that copyrights *may* be attached to the photography you supply in your query results -- I hang my hat on the word "may" [and feel protected in that I don't monetize my blog posts]).

Doing an image search led me to find actual pit bulls "dancing", which led me to the youtube and a search there that turned up what ended up being my random tune for the night -- Torgny Melin's "I'm a Dansbander, Yes I Am" -- they are apparently a Swedish pop phenomenon (and now I have a second Swedish pop reference behind Abba should I have be quizzed to name any Swedish rockers).

Of course, all of this means that it's even more of a stretch to share my observation that PitBull always seems to be dancing like he's violently playing a game of dice (I'm not bein' a hater -- it's just an observation -- heaven knows that I'm guilty of only demonstrating my "rhythm" during DUIs [dancing under the influence]).

There you go -- I'm not sure I could get any more random than all that!

MY FIRST TORGNY MELIN'S TUNE:

July 22, 2013

Random Memorial for Monday 7/22/13

Gone but not forgotten:  the Moo and Oink stores (with their accompanying commercials).

Every time I head down LSD (that's Lakeshore Drive, not a trip courtesy of the hallucinogenic drug) and leave town over the Chicago Skyway, I can't help but get sad when I pass the (now dilapidated) former Moo and Oink store.

Not that I ever shopped there -- I wouldn't know a chitlin if it rose up out of the display case and slapped me silly -- but I did so enjoy my potluck Thanksgiving meal back at TCF when I worked there after first moving to Chicago (oh the soul food that fed my soul that day) ... and I do still get my regular fixin' of collared greens every now and then at Shirly's house.  [I bring those experiences up because I have to think those items were always for sale in these stores.]

Having researched the info for today's post, I discovered that the brand and the logo and the mascots were bought and products are now for sale at some existing grocery stores (and online) -- but until they bring back the great commercials, I won't be entirely satisfied.

Real estate that *still* makes me say "moooooooo and oiiiink" when I pass by it, you are missed.

IT'S HARD TO BEAT THIS COMMERCIAL:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zz8fTbLjo9c

IT'S LIKE THE STORY OF THE TWINKIES, BUT MORE MEATY:
http://chicago.cbslocal.com/2011/12/14/moo-oink-name-goes-to-highest-bidder-530000/

NOT DEAD YET!:
http://www.moo-oink.com/

July 21, 2013

Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 7/21/13

What Chicago is talking about this week:

Free wi-fi at the beach.

A few years ago, the company for which I work went through a change that resulted in me being a remote workplace employee (I roll out of bed, and get connected to my laptop for a day's worth of activities in and about nearly three dozen internet based systems -- it's fun and modern and makes me gain weight easily!).

Today, Chicago has decided to "see" that overall experience, and to "raise" it by one -- as they have announced free wi-fi at certain city beaches.  I am actively exploring how to make my equipment waterproof, and determining the life of my existing laptop battery, and figuring out if I can string a number of industrial style extension cords together to render the battery life question moot, and I am now realizing that my dream of making my skin sizzle whilst listening to the crash of the waves of Lake Michigan, all at the same time I'm busily producing work output, is one step closer to reality.  Now how do I handle the glare?

Co-workers of mine -- listen closely to the background of my skypes and google hangouts, and you just might hear the sounds of summer playing out all around me.

WORK FROM HOME EVEN IF HOME IS A BEACH:
http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/local/breaking/redeye-free-wifi-at-5-chicago-beaches-20130722,0,3823783.story

THE EQUIPMENT WAS DONATED (WONDER IF THE NSA IS LISTENING?):
http://www.bizjournals.com/chicago/news/2013/07/19/free-wifi-now-available-at-five-beaches.html

TIME TO STUDY UP:
http://toomanyadapters.com/five-tips-keeping-laptop-alive-tropical-climates/

July 20, 2013

Random Soapbox for Saturday 7/20/13

I don't mean to go off on a rave here, but ...

[still committed ... once a month ... to rave instead of rant weely ...]

... thank goodness the Sochi folks caved when it came to their plan to mass exterminate about 2000 stray cats and dogs before the Olympics.

Who cares about Snowden living on the cold frozen tarmac spilling spy secrets, when it comes to suggesting a boycott, I was ready to join the effort based on the approach of "we must kill them for the protection of the athletes and the improvement of our city's image".  Supposedly, (and very very quickly after news first broke, I might add with just a touch of suspicion), a non-profit will now build a shelter, and efforts will be undertaken to treat and sterilize instead of annihilate in advance of the games.

Want to make me rave more?  If you are in the market for a new family member, please visit your local shelter to adopt today (I just stopped by the local PAWS to donate the rest of Baby's experimental old-cat food and I can attest that there are many animals seeking a forever home).  And, in the words of the late great Bob Barker (he is dead, right?) ... don't forget to spay or neuter your pets (to help control the stray population)!

THE PLAN THAT REVERSES THE ORIGINAL PLAN (HOORAY)!:
http://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/olympics/2013/04/18/sochi-russia-winter-olympics-cats-dogs-/2093817/

OOPS -- MAYBE HE'S JUST GREAT AND NOT LATE:
http://www.deadoraliveinfo.com/dead.Nsf/bnames/Barker+Bob

A NOBLE CAUSE, THIS PAWS:
http://www.pawschicago.org/


July 19, 2013

Random Flashback for Friday 7/19/13

Twenty years ago this summer, I was in my apartment in Uniontown (pictured elsewhere in this series of 1993 photos) ... and so were these seldom seen members of my family -- my niece and nephew Ashlyn and Nic!

["Seldom seen" is all relative when it comes to my relatives -- as, thanks to the Facebook, I get to virtually see them much more nowadays -- which is nice, since the event that brought them into PA twenty years ago was the last time I was in the same room as these youngsters.  Life flies by so quickly ...]

By the way, that's my biological mother in the middle.  In my adult history, I've seen her once a decade (my high school graduation in the 80's, for this event in the 90's and for a nephew's graduation in the 00's).  I state that factually, not judgmentally, as I am fully aware that you play the hand that is dealt you (in this case, dealt by a Lebanon County judge in a seventies style divorce, and exacerbated by a jealous new wife of the baby daddy of 60% of your kids) and I want to try to salvage the tone of this post to something as celebratory as that which brought us all together twenty years ago (more to come about that in subsequent Friday flashbacks).  [Plus, let's face it, I'm old enough and well-traveled enough to take matters into my own hands should I so choose.]

So -- here's to what was a happy visit in the summer of 1993!  Be sure to cherish the times you have with your family!


July 18, 2013

Random Thought for Thursday 7/18/13

I'm not ashamed to say it.

I root for the bulls each year.  And I don't mean the local team that plays bball at the United Center.  I mean the ones in the picture.

I know that they all die in bullfighting later.  But I am perfectly fine with the fact that they might take out a few idiots as they stampede through the streets on the way to their certain death.

Sorry all you Hemmingway fans.  Find some other way to prove what manly men you are.  I scoff at you and the chance you'll be gored -- as a matter of fact, I welcome it.

Go Bulls!

WARNING:  THESE PICS ARE, INDEED, AS THEY SAY, GOREY:
http://coed.com/2013/07/12/running-of-the-bulls-best-worst-gores/#photo=15

WAIT A MINUTE -- THEY DO THIS IN VA AS WELL?:
http://forcechange.com/66160/call-for-the-end-of-inhumane-bull-run/

HOW WE GOT HERE:
http://www.time.com/time/nation/article/0,8599,1908948,00.html


July 17, 2013

Random Wordplay for Wednesday 7/17/13

Low-roller reprise.

Used in a sentence:  "Nothing makes me realize that I do not belong in Vegas than reflecting on my second annual work trip I'm on to Sin City -- truly a low-roller reprise from last year."

In 2012, I found an old fashioned one-armed bandit quarter machine, put in my twenty bucks and cashed out the first time it went back over my original investment (and I was ecstatic to make twelve bucks).  In 2013, I did not have such luck -- my winnings were incremental and never sizable, so I watched them all disappear (admittedly, I was playing a five-line one armed bandit machine, and I think I passed up a few payouts being stingy by only playing singular credits before I caught on to the options I had).

Truth be told, my budget for the trip was wiped out on the first night when I went seeking the third burger in my quest to partake of all twenty-five listed on the 2013 Zagat list.  It turns out "just outside of town" in a Vegas taxi is a pretty penny when the to and the fro trips are added up.  I'm embarrassed to say exactly what surcharge I paid to check this off my list, but suffice it to say that the task of eating the slider meant that my social budget was all but eaten up as well.

Oh well -- it's not like I needed it to gamble, what with my low-roller status and all.  Maybe next year!

THE SOURCE MATERIAL INFORMING MY LATEST QUEST:
http://www.usatoday.com/story/travel/2013/02/18/get-your-buns-to-zagats-top-25-burger-joints/1928829/

SURE IT TASTED GOOD, BUT THE CAB RIDE TO AND FRO WAS EXPENSIVE:
http://slidinthru.com/

GUESS I'LL HAVE TO DO THIS NEXT YEAR:
http://www.lasvegassun.com/news/2013/mar/06/construction-underway-slotzilla-part-new-downtown-/

July 16, 2013

Random Tune for Tuesday 7/16/13

They are back.

A new album this October.

A new release that is a perfect choice to be the tune for today.

A new concert tour (happy to be in the fan club, but sad to have my discretionary income tied up in other things so I can't participate in the lottery this year).

A visit to my back porch (kind of -- the proximity of my domicile to Wrigley means that I can sit outside and listen to any concert there, like the one they are providing this weekend).  It's even better if the wind is blowing just right -- but I have no fear that these boys will be loud enough for me to hear regardless.

Welcome back PJam!  Looking forward to October (and to reliving so much of my youth in your music that I'll play whilst waiting in the months preceding the release).

A MESSAGE FOR OUR TIMES?:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DhODYyZVL6Y

July 15, 2013

Random Memorial for Monday 7/15/13

Gone but not forgotten:  Cory Monteith.

Contrary to my usual tone, you'll find no snark here.  I briefly toyed with stating that I think Dean/Brody should contact his agent and negotiate a return to the show, but this doesn't seem to be the place nor the time for that.

Instead, I'll just mourn the loss of yet another young actor long before he should have left this world.  And I'll reiterate that the best of the best demonstrate full functionality even as they toy with the deadly mix of drugs and alcohol.  And I'll lament the fact that the walking wounded among us see no other recourse but to self-medicate instead of seeking the help they need.

It will be difficult to return gleefully to the quality show that is Glee this fall (assuming they find a writerly way to address this), for you, young man, will be missed.

THE MOST DANGEROUS THING TO DO IS TO MIX A SEDATIVE WITH A SEDATIVE:
http://www.scu.edu/wellness/topics/alcohol/mixingalcohol.cfm

SEEK HELP -- ATTEND A MEETING:
http://www.chicagona.org/

THE LATEST ON THE PLANS FOR THE FIFTH SEASON:
http://insidetv.ew.com/2013/07/20/lea-michele-cory-monteith-ryan-murphy/

  

July 14, 2013

Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 7/14/13

What Chicago is talking about this week:

The Verdict.

I have to tell you, I'm just not that sure what I have to add to the national conversation at this point -- although I will say if Facebook and other social media had been big during the trial of my century (that's the one with the dancing Itos and the Glove nursery rhymes and the original Kardashian baby daddy [not the current Kanye one]), I have a feeling that second civil war that various factions have been hinting at as a possibility would have happened back then.  (Or maybe a few years after that, when Clarence and Anita testified about pubic hair on pop cans [oh picture the meme possibilities].)

And I have to tell you that I've searched the interwebs and I can't find anyone who referred to the Zimmerman weight gain as a "twinkie offense", so maybe I can be the first?  I mean twinkies and hate crime murder cases go together like gloves and hands that fit into them (since the days of H. Milk), and surely this was a strategy to fatten up the Zman to appear less threatening to a jury, right?  What with the return of the snack treat from the depths of bankruptcy around the same time as the trial, that wordplay just seemed like a slam dunk.

And one more thing I have to tell you -- it is odd how the subconscious works.  I could have sworn the other night that I was awakened from my sleep with the sounds of someone outside the window yelling "help" (with a cheap AC unit installed, the sound barrier to Wrigleyville is compromised).  Upon reflection, it might have just been Murder (the sole remaining pet in the apartment) playing her usual game of "whine and seek" (she puts the cat in caterwaul, let me tell you), or it might have been a random drunkard yelling something that sounds close to the help word (or the word itself), but there were no sounds of shots fired after that which I thought was a scream (in my 'hood, we tend to stab each other and eschew guns [at least for now]) and there were no bodies on the corner the next morning, so I'm thinking it must have been my dream state processing the gorging of related news stories I had stuffed into my cranium throughout the preceding 24 hour period.

And so life goes on -- well, for those of us who survive overzealous watchmen ...

TWINKIE OFFENSE GOOGLE SEARCH DOES TURN UP THIS ARTICLE:
http://www.nationalreview.com/corner/333601/twinkie-offense-mark-steyn

WHO KNEW?  CATERWAUL THE CAT IS AN EXISTING CHARACTER:
https://www.facebook.com/pages/Caterwaul-the-Cat/217133498345787

ARE YOU TOO YOUNG TO UNDERSTAND THE PUBIC HAIR REFERENCE?:
http://www.zimbio.com/America's+50+Most+Scandalous+Political+Scandals/articles/20/Clarence+Thomas+Anita+Hill+Pubic+Hair+Can

July 13, 2013

Random Soapbox for Saturday 7/13/13

I don't mean to go off on a rant here, but ...

Dear God ...

[Or Dear Satan ... Come to think of it, I'm not sure who is actually responsible for the experience once people get to hell, beyond the obligatory wailing and gnashing of teeth that's been promised.  I mean God created the heavens and the earth and he banished Satan to hell, so I guess he must have created that as well prior to the banishment.  But let's face it, Lucifer was sent there a long time ago, so he's probably had lots of opportunity to put his own imprint on the place.  And, what with all the "creative types" that are supposed to regularly join him there (according to hateful signs I sometimes see), I'm thinking the whole layout has probably gone through a redo a time or two in the last however many years, just because I'm sure it would make him pissed to hear "oh, this is *so* last season" when folks arrive.  But I digress ...]

Dear Powerful Religious Figure Who Gets Assessed on the Overall Hell Experience:  Please assure me that there is a special place of torment (now do you understand how I ended up going down that earlier path?) reserved for those who blatantly ignore the signs above the lanes at the remaining tollway spots that do not have open road tolling -- like the Skyway (as beautifully pictured in this image) -- and who interrupt what should have been my speedier processing time by forcing an employee to leave his or her booth and to come over to the unmanned or unwomaned spot to take your cash.

THE LANES HAVE A FLASHING SIGN ABOVE THEM TELLING YOU WHICH VEHICLES PLANNING WHICH KIND OF PAYMENT ARE ALLOWED TO ENTER!  PROCESS THAT BEFORE YOU CHOOSE A DAMN LANE!!

Maybe, just maybe, you who do this (it seems to be every time I'm there in the lane in front of me) are too old to understand the modern technology that allows those with a not-so-secret transponder to electronically transact in these scenarios -- but then, if so, you just might be too old to be driving on fancy fast paced highways and you should restrict yourself to back roads ... in the country ... on Sundays ... in your model-Ts ... wearing driving gloves.

Maybe, just maybe, you who do this (to me -- always to me -- I'm starting to take it personally) are unfamiliar with the English language and do not have the skills to interpret the nonsensical word "ipass" to mean "not-you-pass-unless-you-bought-into-the-system".  But come on -- cash is universally understood in every language, right -- money makes the world go round -- so surely you can see and read and understand that such a lane is for you and your cash and you can stay out of mine.

Maybe, just maybe, you who do this (and you must wait by the side of the road until you see me coming and then jump in line a few cars ahead of me to screw things up for me) are simply self-centered and lazy and roll up on these plazas and gravitate toward the smallest line because your mommie told you everyone is special and that you deserve only the best no matter what and that the world owes you.  And if that shoe fits, well then you are the group that I can't wait to see suffering the most if I ever get a tour of the underworld (like in a near death experience).

Maybe, just maybe, one day I'll do this by accident and end up in the wrong lane, and then I'll have to come back and amend this rant and talk about how easy it is to get confused sometimes when you are driving long hours and every state has its own rules and you just want to get a move on.  But that's not today -- today I want you all in the aforementioned group to go to hell.

Oh -- and to have safe travels.  But mostly --  to go to hell.

IT'S BEEN A PROBLEM SINCE 2003:
http://articles.chicagotribune.com/2003-12-15/news/0312150144_1_lanes-tollway-officials-illinois-tollway

THEY'LL GET YOU IF YOU VIOLATE THEM!:
http://www.illinoistollway.com/contact-us/violation-enforcement

CATHOLICS ANSWER MY "DID GOD CREATE HELL" QUESTION:
http://forums.catholic.com/showthread.php?t=151384

July 12, 2013

Random Flashback for Friday 7/12/13

Look closely at this picture.

You will see no technology -- no cell phone (it would still be a year or two before I met DJ -- the first exposure I had to a "bag phone" that he kept in his jeep), no interwebs, no Facebook, no email, no blogger.

What you *will* see is someone practicing the ancient art of letter writing.  Next to me in the sand, that's a pile of correspondence to which I was replying -- and for those of you for whom this concept is foreign, I would have taken my replies and put them in individual envelopes and affixed a stamp (according to the Wiki, one that cost .29 twenty years ago in 1993).  And then the US Postal Service would have delivered them (you may have heard of them -- they are the ones taking Saturdays off later this summer).

Of course, the color of my skin and the shoreline in the background points to the fact that, even on vacations, this guy is happiest writing.  I still take "work" with me when I go away although I don't think I've written a letter in months (maybe even years)!

[And look at me -- I'm tattoo free!  And yes, that's a Thalia/Melpomene Greek Muse gold chain around my neck (this was in the midst of my full blown theatrical phase).]