Used in a sentence: "Schedule me on the Shark Tank ... submit my two week notice to my employer ... pre-order me my nouveau riche status symbols ... because I have stumbled on what will make me my millions: Bacon Mulch ™ ® © patent pending."
Having traded Chicago apartments for Floridian homes when it comes to my domicile, I quickly learned since the big move that there is no yard problem that some mulch can't solve. And then addiction set in. My enablers, the big box hardware stores, would seduce me with their 5 for 10 sales, and soon there was red mulch marking the perimeter of the front yard, and brown mulch forming a sidewalk from the driveway all the way through to the back yard, and cypress mulch demarcating multiple flower beds surrounding the small area left for some sod.
Sitting out on the lanai (okay, okay ... it's just a stone patio ... but once those dollars come rolling in, it will be transformed into a lanai that would make Dorothy, Blanche and Rose jealous), surrounded by that fresh cypress aroma ... it hit me -- bacon colored wood chippings giving off a bacony odor. That's what would make the back yard experience all that much better.
So venture capitalists ... send my your funding ... and this evening, I'll take the first steps toward achieving my dreams by pouring the leftover grease from tonight's baconing out on the existing mulch ... creating my very FIRST (but definitely not my last) batch of Bacon Mulch ™ ® © patent pending.
WHAT I FIND WHEN I GOOGLE BACON MULCH:
http://ellen-inandoutofthegarden.blogspot.com/2012/03/quilts-mulch-and-bacon.html
I MAY BE USING THESE MARKS PREMATURELY:
http://howconceptual.com/tm-symbol/
AS WITH ANY ADDICTION, THERE ARE CONSEQUENCES:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/06/04/AR2008060401063.html
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