Gone but not forgotten: all the fun things I associate with prison life. [Disclaimer: my view of that life is heavily influenced by those marathons of Lockup and Extreme Lockup on late night MSNBC and the male-soap-opera OZ from HBO].
With all respect to Oscar winning ThreeSixMafia, "it's hard out there for a prisoner". And I don't mean internationally (although between the 44 who died in the Mexican Gang War this weekend, and the 359 who perished in the prison fire in Honduras [those countries are clearly taking a very hard line stance at controlling the prison population!]), but domestically where Texas has stopped giving death row inmates their choice of last meal* and where Michigan and North Carolina and Texas and New York have all cancelled or cut back their chain gang public works activities**.
The opportunity to go down to Texas on a killing spree and to get caught and to get sentenced to death row and to ask for what would have been my last meal request (a six pack of Guinness, an appetizer of bacon wrapped scallop, soup course of Campbell's chicken noodle with oyster crackers, a loaf of garlic bread, main course of thick cut medium rare t-bone steak with sides of garlic smashed potatoes, creamed garlic spinach and extremely buttered corn on the cob, and then a dessert flight consisting of a skillet sized cookie with a chocolate ice cream sundae on top made with cookies and cream ice cream, a perfectly crusted creme brulee and a gurney-side prepared Bananas Foster -- plus a glass of German brandy Asbach-Uralt to wash it all down) ... you will be missed.
THEY SHOULD PLAY ALL SEASONS OF THIS FOR THOSE SCARED STRAIGHT EVENTS:
http://store.hbo.com/oz/index.php?v=hbo_shows_oz
*THEY SHOULD HAVE GIVEN HIM STONES, DIRT AND GRAVEL FOR HIS LAST MEAL:
http://www.npr.org/blogs/thetwo-way/2011/09/23/140735845/no-more-special-last-meals-for-death-row-inmates-in-texas
**THEY SHOULD HAVE KEPT THE CHAIN GANGS BUT THEY COST TOO MUCH MONEY:
http://www.usatoday.com/news/nation/story/2011-09-13/prison-work-crews-budget-cuts/50394786/1
No comments:
Post a Comment