Gone but not forgotten: wanting to be the air that someone breathes.
It strikes me that for you to be the air that someone breathes, you'd have to be in proximity to that person's mouth. Which, in turn, would put you dangerously close to that person's exhalations -- which are, by nature, carbon dioxide laden. Which means that you would slowly suffocate. Which suddenly isn't so romantic. Coming soon -- the dangers of whispered sweet nothings in an ear full or wax.
My go-to exhortation of romanticism, you will be missed.
BON JOVI WANTS TO DO IT:
http://www.lyrics007.com/Bon%20Jovi%20%26%20Jon%20Bon%20Jovi%20Lyrics/I'll%20Be%20There%20For%20You%20Lyrics.html
AS DOES CELINE DION:
http://www.elyrics.net/read/c/celine-dion-lyrics/i-want-you-to-need-me-lyrics.html
EVOLUTIONARILY, MICE HAVE A FEAR OF CARBON DIOXIDE BUILD-UP:
http://www.livescience.com/5910-carbon-dioxide-triggers-primordial-fear-suffocation.html
February 28, 2011
February 27, 2011
Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 2/27/11
What Chicago is talking about this week:
Let the Rahmmania begin! Now that he's mayor elect, we're learning all kinds of random trivia. For instance, he's missing part of his middle finger from an Arby's slicer accident in his youth -- that then had to be partially amputated because he swam in Lake Michigan and it got infected. First, I fear an Arby's-free future may now be coming to Chicago (and, as it is, I have to go downtown or the suburbs to get my Big Montana-ish fix). Second, when all the people were taking him to task for not being a resident, why didn't he just raise his middle finger and say that he lost a digit in our e-coli infected waters -- because nothing says "I'm from Chicago" quite like that.
MAYBE I SHOULD BUY ARBY's?:
http://chicagobreakingbusiness.com/2011/01/arbys-to-be-put-up-for-sale.html
NINE MORE RAHM FACTS:
http://www.wgntv.com/entertainment/viral/wgntv-leshock-rahm-emanuel-feb23,0,5660653.story
CAREFUL WHEN YOU GOOGLE SEARCH FOR BIG MONTANA - I MISS THE SANDWICH:
http://www.phoood.com/weblog/archives/000118.html
Let the Rahmmania begin! Now that he's mayor elect, we're learning all kinds of random trivia. For instance, he's missing part of his middle finger from an Arby's slicer accident in his youth -- that then had to be partially amputated because he swam in Lake Michigan and it got infected. First, I fear an Arby's-free future may now be coming to Chicago (and, as it is, I have to go downtown or the suburbs to get my Big Montana-ish fix). Second, when all the people were taking him to task for not being a resident, why didn't he just raise his middle finger and say that he lost a digit in our e-coli infected waters -- because nothing says "I'm from Chicago" quite like that.
MAYBE I SHOULD BUY ARBY's?:
http://chicagobreakingbusiness.com/2011/01/arbys-to-be-put-up-for-sale.html
NINE MORE RAHM FACTS:
http://www.wgntv.com/entertainment/viral/wgntv-leshock-rahm-emanuel-feb23,0,5660653.story
CAREFUL WHEN YOU GOOGLE SEARCH FOR BIG MONTANA - I MISS THE SANDWICH:
http://www.phoood.com/weblog/archives/000118.html
February 26, 2011
Random Soapbox for Saturday 2/26/11
I don't mean to go off on a rant here, but ...
... I did promise earlier in the week that I would tell my story about raising my voice a few decibels at the local Jewel.
The scene -- having returned from vacation to a Mrs. Hubbard's cupboards situation at home, I headed to my grocery store (Jewel) to fill up a cart of groceries. Like many establishments, they have a preferred card (to monitor your purchasing habits in a creepy big-brother kind of way) which entitles you to sale prices. Sometimes, one forgets to bring the card -- and the cashiers have access to a "fake one" that they enter on your behalf. Today was a day I forgot the card -- but today was also the beginning of the new policy that no more "fake card" use would be allowed.
"Unacceptable!", I said to the cashier. I told her to look at my cart, stuffed full of necessities (including new Guinness Black Lager!) as I explained that I wouldn't be paying what amounted to a "Jewel tax" just because I had left my card at home. A search in their system by phone number didn't pull up my information -- and so I was left with no options.
Well, not quite -- startling her and everyone around me, I leapt out of the line and, in my loudest stage voice possible (projecting -- it's like riding a bike!) ... I asked passing customers if I could borrow their card to beat this system. Finally, a woman (possibly frightened by my heightened sense of alarm and loud vocality) handed me her car keys (which also had her preferred card on it) and said timidly, "please don't take my car".
Crisis averted, I then came to learn that the manager was standing in the next aisle, stocking gum, listening to my ranting and doing nothing the whole time. Upon reflection, I get it. Using the "fake card" means that there was no information being tracked. And it's not the cashier's fault (she shared with me that she was told by management that if people push back, they are welcome to abandon their cart -- which, in a highly competitive market in a business with slim slim profit margins seems ludicrous), especially since she wasn't even old enough to scan my new Guinness Black Lager. I place all the blame with the manager -- whose own company doesn't trust him to have the discretion to avoid this type of situation.
Shame on you, timid manager. I may have come across as a little scary, but someone in your position needs to demonstrate that situational application of the policies and procedures is sometimes necessary.
NEW GUINNESS FINALLY IN CHICAGO:
http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/food-and-drink/news/can-new-guinness-lager-live-up-to-the-legendary-name-1927432.html
SHELF vs SALE PRICES AT JEWEL:
http://www.mashupmom.com/?p=33983
MOTHER HUBBARD's CUPBOARDS FURNITURE:
http://www.mhcfurniture.com/
... I did promise earlier in the week that I would tell my story about raising my voice a few decibels at the local Jewel.
The scene -- having returned from vacation to a Mrs. Hubbard's cupboards situation at home, I headed to my grocery store (Jewel) to fill up a cart of groceries. Like many establishments, they have a preferred card (to monitor your purchasing habits in a creepy big-brother kind of way) which entitles you to sale prices. Sometimes, one forgets to bring the card -- and the cashiers have access to a "fake one" that they enter on your behalf. Today was a day I forgot the card -- but today was also the beginning of the new policy that no more "fake card" use would be allowed.
"Unacceptable!", I said to the cashier. I told her to look at my cart, stuffed full of necessities (including new Guinness Black Lager!) as I explained that I wouldn't be paying what amounted to a "Jewel tax" just because I had left my card at home. A search in their system by phone number didn't pull up my information -- and so I was left with no options.
Well, not quite -- startling her and everyone around me, I leapt out of the line and, in my loudest stage voice possible (projecting -- it's like riding a bike!) ... I asked passing customers if I could borrow their card to beat this system. Finally, a woman (possibly frightened by my heightened sense of alarm and loud vocality) handed me her car keys (which also had her preferred card on it) and said timidly, "please don't take my car".
Crisis averted, I then came to learn that the manager was standing in the next aisle, stocking gum, listening to my ranting and doing nothing the whole time. Upon reflection, I get it. Using the "fake card" means that there was no information being tracked. And it's not the cashier's fault (she shared with me that she was told by management that if people push back, they are welcome to abandon their cart -- which, in a highly competitive market in a business with slim slim profit margins seems ludicrous), especially since she wasn't even old enough to scan my new Guinness Black Lager. I place all the blame with the manager -- whose own company doesn't trust him to have the discretion to avoid this type of situation.
Shame on you, timid manager. I may have come across as a little scary, but someone in your position needs to demonstrate that situational application of the policies and procedures is sometimes necessary.
NEW GUINNESS FINALLY IN CHICAGO:
http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/food-and-drink/news/can-new-guinness-lager-live-up-to-the-legendary-name-1927432.html
SHELF vs SALE PRICES AT JEWEL:
http://www.mashupmom.com/?p=33983
MOTHER HUBBARD's CUPBOARDS FURNITURE:
http://www.mhcfurniture.com/
February 25, 2011
Random Flashback for Friday 2/25/11
So ... a Happy Birthday wish is in order (actually at midnight as her bday is tomorrow) to my niece Casey Jo, seen here in this picture 20 years ago as she celebrated her 1st birthday -- which means I could now bump into Casey in a bar when I return to visit my hometown this Memorial Day weekend. [Not that a nearly 40 year old would hang out in the same bars as 21 year olds -- but Lebanon is a small enough locale that it could happen!] Casey Jo, here's hopin' you're having a wonderful celebration! All the best to you and yours ....
February 24, 2011
Random Thought for Thursday 2/24/11
I finally caught the TLC series Addiction the other night while on vacation and it struck me that I would be much more impressed with the girl who ate toilet paper if the end result (pun fully intended) was that she no longer had to wipe when she eliminated. That way, instead of being "touched", she would have been just "super efficient"!
ADDICTED ON TLC:
http://tlc.discovery.com/tv/addicted/
HER FAVORITE TYPE IS TWO-PLY -- MINE WOULD BE UNUSED:
http://www.tvsquad.com/2010/12/30/a-woman-whos-addicted-to-eating-toilet-paper-shes-eaten-1-2/
CONSUMER REPORT ON TOILET PAPER DOES NOT INCLUDE TASTE FACTOR:
http://www.consumertipsreports.org/choosing_the_best_toilet_paper.html
ADDICTED ON TLC:
http://tlc.discovery.com/tv/addicted/
HER FAVORITE TYPE IS TWO-PLY -- MINE WOULD BE UNUSED:
http://www.tvsquad.com/2010/12/30/a-woman-whos-addicted-to-eating-toilet-paper-shes-eaten-1-2/
CONSUMER REPORT ON TOILET PAPER DOES NOT INCLUDE TASTE FACTOR:
http://www.consumertipsreports.org/choosing_the_best_toilet_paper.html
February 23, 2011
Random Wordplay for Wednesday 2/23/11
300 Sextillion.
Used in a multiple choice question: "300 Sextillion is ...
A) ... the latest calculation in dollars for our deficit.
B) ... the decibel level I used today at the Jewel grocery store when they told me they wouldn't scan the fake rewards card that they've always used (because I had forgotten mine at home, but more of that on Saturday -- it's a rant and a half just waiting to happen).
C) ... the latest and truest calculation of the amount of stars in our galaxy.
D) ... what you call it when a host of cotillion girls have an orgy.
E) ... 300,000,000,000,000,000,000,000."
FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS ABOUT THE JEWEL PREFERRED CARD:
https://www.jewelosco.com/contact/faqs/preferred-cards.jsp
UP GOES THE DEFICIT:
http://www.aolnews.com/2010/10/15/f/
THAT MEANS INCREASED CHANCE FOR ALIEN LIFE:
http://www.examiner.com/astronomy-in-cleveland/300-sextillion-stars-major-nasa-announcement-about-alien-life-today
[Note: the answer is E. You may have chosen C, but that's a trick distractor answer (hey, give me a break -- I work in test prep) as it's the new number of stars in the universe and not the galaxy.]
Used in a multiple choice question: "300 Sextillion is ...
A) ... the latest calculation in dollars for our deficit.
B) ... the decibel level I used today at the Jewel grocery store when they told me they wouldn't scan the fake rewards card that they've always used (because I had forgotten mine at home, but more of that on Saturday -- it's a rant and a half just waiting to happen).
C) ... the latest and truest calculation of the amount of stars in our galaxy.
D) ... what you call it when a host of cotillion girls have an orgy.
E) ... 300,000,000,000,000,000,000,000."
FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS ABOUT THE JEWEL PREFERRED CARD:
https://www.jewelosco.com/contact/faqs/preferred-cards.jsp
UP GOES THE DEFICIT:
http://www.aolnews.com/2010/10/15/f/
THAT MEANS INCREASED CHANCE FOR ALIEN LIFE:
http://www.examiner.com/astronomy-in-cleveland/300-sextillion-stars-major-nasa-announcement-about-alien-life-today
[Note: the answer is E. You may have chosen C, but that's a trick distractor answer (hey, give me a break -- I work in test prep) as it's the new number of stars in the universe and not the galaxy.]
February 22, 2011
Random Tune for Tuesday 2/22/11
The letter D (in my ongoing series AtoZ Musical Eccentricities (the cassette years)) brings me to this "rare" youtube find (appreciated more if you are of the 80's) of the video for Blasphemous Rumors. And, hey, if you can't get behind the pointed message of the chorus "I don't want to start any blasphemous rumors but I think that God's got a sick sense of humor and when I die I expect to find him laughing ..." (which is admittedly a little dirge-y, but not everyone has the best coping skills), you can at least marvel at the lead singer's elocution and his ability to articulate so distinctly at that section.
D IS FOR DEPECHE MODE!:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-__VV94ziiQ
D IS FOR DEPECHE MODE!:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-__VV94ziiQ
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