REMINDER
No fear. Concrete plans with action steps so individuals can focus. Specific items to help you best be prepared for life post 1.20.17. Action verbs and goals ... also known as ... a twelve part primer on how to prepare for a Trump "Presidency".
Already shared ...
PART ONE: Learn how to scale a wall
PART TWO: Subscribe to 'The Crusader'
PART THREE: Max out your credit cards (quickly)
PART THREE: Max out your credit cards (quickly)
PART FOUR: Find the nearest fallout shelter
PART FIVE: Renovate your closet
PART SIX: Study French AND Russian (for slightly different reasons)
PART SEVEN: Study Nixon
PART EIGHT: Start an office pool
PART NINE: Get a gun
PART TEN: Get male
PART ELEVEN: Get a female cup
PART TWELVE: Get white
As soon as possible, please. It's only for your own good. Things haven't even started yet *officially* and all the transition team news is tripping the light fandango in order to be the *whitest* shade of pale.
And you might want to practice the makeup until you land on the shade of whiteface that Eddie Murphy used back in the day to more easily secure bank loans. (You could also go for the shade that the younger Wayans Boys use in there movies, but that was more about getting laid, and doesn't quite have the same noble purpose.)
A special note to those of you of mixed race, where one ancestor was white. For the next little bit of time, it is recommended that you gather up the pictures and cultural touchstones related to your non-white relatives and get rid of them. I don't think you have to discard them completely (I do believe America will be great again after it sheds this throwback to a more hateful times), but I do think you might want to put them in that renovated closet you took care of in part five of this primer for safekeeping.
A special note to those of you whiteys who live in sunny areas ... careful not to tan yourself into ethnicity. That's just asking for trouble.
Finally, if it's impossible for you to "get white" in time to help your situation, you may still have a path to acceptance IF you are willing to be a token. If so, learn what you can from Dr. Ben Carson (focus on the head separating stuff and not the knife wielding history ... and ignore the part about those pyramids ... or how a doctor of medicine doesn't quite understand science). Having that one non-white friend apparently goes a long way in easing the conscience.
Good luck to you! (And good luck to us!)
COMING TOMORROW ... EPILOGUE
ACTION STEP: PRACTICE YOUR WHITE FACE (BONUS -- GET BANK LOANS):
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